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Parents' Handbook: NLP and Common Sense Guide for Family Well-Being Paperback – September 20, 2012
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About the Author
Roger Ellerton, PhD, CMC, a father of four, is passionate about helping others get what they desire in life. He is a skilled life coach, certified NLP trainer, public speaker and author of many articles and books, including "Live Your Dreams Let Reality Catch Up". --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Drawing on neuro-linguistic programming, more commonly known as NLP, the Parents' Handbook provides you with tools, techniques and approaches for healthy parenting. It is a resource that not only parents, but anyone seeking to improve their relationship with children and youth, will find enlightening. As an organizational consultant, I use and promote many of these techniques in the workplace.
The book is divided into eight chapters. The first three chapters set the stage by helping the reader to understand the basics of NLP and using that information to better understand themselves, their spouse and their children. There are so many good ideas throughout these early chapters, but these two set the tone for the rest of the book.
"Your perception of the world is your reality."
"Your thoughts and actions in the present create your future."
The following three chapters provides techniques for improving communication, tools for change, and steps to achieve your desired outcomes. Examples of techniques include developing rapport, reframing, anchoring and mirroring. A key idea in the toolkit is "changing your perception, changes your reaction." It is amazing how changing a few words can change an experience.
Chapter 7 explores the six primary parenting roles: caretaker and guide, coach, teacher, mentor, sponsor, and awakener. This chapter is filled with tips about how parents need to change their parenting style to correspond with their child's stage of growth and need.
Chapter 8 recaps the material and then provides strategies for effective learning. When you read that 50% of your child's brain nerve cells are connected by the age of six and that ages six to twelve are the most formative years for developing basis skills, it is not hard to see how critical parenting is during these important years.
There is a lot of content covered in these 200+ pages. Parents not familiar with NLP or the underpinning philosophy might be somewhat overwhelmed at first. Take your time as you go through this material. Reflect on what is presented. Do the exercises. Practice the techniques. It is well worth it.
While the book is engaging and an enjoyable read, your parenting style is unlikely to change until you begin to apply the strategies put forth by the author.
As a parent of a 17 year old, I am glad that I have a copy in my bookshelf.
Val Kinjerski, PhD, author - Rethinking Your Work: Getting to the Heart of What Matters
Parents' Handbook: NLP & Common Sense Guide for Family Well-Being provides tools, techniques and approaches to improve our communication, to be available emotionally and physically, and to successfully fulfill the different parenting roles through the NLP approach.
NLP is the acronym for Neurolinguistic Programming, strategies for personal development and growth. Neuro refers to neurology - our visual, auditory, kinesthetic, gustatory and olfactory sensory experiences. Linguistic refers to how we use the language of the mind to make sense of and remember an experience or to forecast a future experience. What does this mean for us as parents?
If we believe we don't have good parenting skills, what two thousand bits of information do we pay attention to at any given moment - All those times that we do not meet our expectations, thus reinforcing the belief. The NLP model shows how we filter information based on our beliefs, values and memories, and encourages us to step outside of our comfort zone and explore our children's realties.
I enjoyed this book immensely because of the clarity of its organization. The easy-to-read language walked me through step-by step how to change. First, Dr. Ellerton made me examine the structure and meaning of how I communicated. Then he offered suggestions for improvement such as rapport and mirroring and leading. And he invited me further...to expand beyond my limitations to achieve my dreams. How perfect is that as a role model for a child's success?
Dr. Ellerton then covers the six roles a parent plays...caretaker, coach, teacher, mentor, sponsor and awakener in using the most effective learning strategies and knowing how to gauge success.
A highly, recommended enjoyable read!