Amazon.com: Customer Reviews: Passion Lubes, Natural Water-Based Lubricant, 55 Gallon Drum
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on August 22, 2016
WARNING: YOU MAY HAVE TROUBLE HOLDING YOUR COCKS WHEN USING THIS PRODUCT.

Two weeks ago me and Julio went down to the ring to bet on our prized Cock, we thought that rubbing lube on our cock would make him more aerodynamic, but little did we know, this product made the slipperiest cock to ever exist. Obviously our cock got the better of theirs, with his aerodynamic stature and slippery state, there was no way our cock could lose, he's definitely one of the better cock beaters I've owned.

We now have a cock champion who has yet to lose a battle using this product. I give this product 3 stars only because we still cant get a hold of our cock, he's out there, beating every cock in existence.
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on July 31, 2016
Upon first thrust I accidentally slipped my entire body into my girlfriend and she exploded. It works really well; 5 stars. =*(
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on July 27, 2016
A barrel of crude oil doesn't even cost this much
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on July 10, 2016
Best soft drink I've ever had- went through the whole tub in a week!
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on June 30, 2016
Need helpful reviews so I can join the vine team. Thanks. 😓
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on June 19, 2016
🐮🔪
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on June 18, 2016
🐮🔪💦
0Comment| 11 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you?YesNoReport abuse
on June 14, 2016
Me and best friend have enjoyed lots of encounter's thanks to this. Cheers for making him and myself more passionate...
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on June 7, 2016
Just what I needed. I poured this into the back of a minivan, and fit all of the furniture from my 10,000 square ft house in one trip.
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on May 14, 2016
Working as a coastguard on the Canadian West Coast is tough, but thanks to this 55 gallon barrel of lube my job became so much easier. Let me explain...

I had been surfing Amazon, originally looking at a pair of binoculars with a ridiculously high range, you know, to survey the beach; until in the recommended section I saw this. 55 gallon of lubricant. I was intrigued, and went onto the product.

I was pleasantly suprised to discover it would only set me back over $1,200; perfect for what I had in mind. I immediately purchased 10 barrels of the product, to have them arrive a week later.

Two days after the barrels had arrived, I was told that a whale had become stranded upon the beach, so instantly I rolled the barrels down the beach. It was a pleasant day, no clouds, ships were out at sea.

I rolled my 10 barrels down the beach to where a crowd had gathered; I shouted at them to get out of the way, my voice cracking like a little bitch.

I found they had gathered around a large humpback whale. I walked up to its face, patted it and whispered into its eye (I didn't know where its ear was) "don't worry little guy, we'll get you back safe."

I rolled up my sleeves, and, like my dad always said, put a little bit of elbow grease into it. I opened the barrels, and started slathering the ground around the whale with lube and slathering the body of the whale with lube.

Barrel after barrel I used until they were empty, and the sand was the brown colour it goes when it becomes wet. The tide had gone out by this point, so the whale was about 200 metres away from the edge of the water. Luckily i'd sufficiently lubed the ground, so it was simple as giving the whale a push.

I shoved the whale, and it began moving slowly down the gradient of the beach. It began building up speed, and was beginning to spin gyrometrically around and around, its fins flapping helplessly.

I stood with my arms folded (and covered in lube), satisfied as the whale was about to re-enter the water, and it was all done by me. But suddenly it hit a sandbank, at the edge of the water, and took flight.

The crowd watched dumbfounded as the whale began sailing through the air, emitting a low noise and lube dropping from its body like bird poo. Several people were hit in the face.

Suddenly the whale began to descend, towards open sea. Then, suddenly, I noticed a kid... yes, it was little Billy Prachard-the store keeper's kid- on his surfboard. I watched, helpless, as the gigantic blob cast a shadow over the boy and board. Prachard looked up, just as the whale obscured him from sight. An all-mighty smack sounded out to shore, accompanied by a sanguine explosion of tissue and erthyocytes in every direction.

The beach was silent, as half of Billy Prachard's board surfaced. Slowly the crowd turned to me.

So I decided to order another 10 barrels of the stuff today, it makes for very effective whale rescue.
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