- Series: Kerner
- Paperback: 222 pages
- Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks; Reprint edition (March 1, 2008)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0060834390
- ISBN-13: 978-0060834395
- Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.2 inches
- Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 216 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #60,168 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man (Kerner) Paperback – January 29, 2008
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"Maybe You Should Talk to Someone" by Lori Gottlieb
"This is a daring, delightful, and transformative book." ―Arianna Huffington, Founder, Huffington Post Learn more
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“In Passionista, his pleasure is all yours!” (Tracey Cox, bestselling author of SuperSex)
“Passionista satisfies the reader with tasty morsels of sexual enlightenment, nibble by nibble, bite by bite.” (Lou Paget, best-selling author of How to Be a Great Lover and The Great Lover Playbook)
From the Back Cover
Transform Yourself from "Passion Victim" to Passionista!
In the smash hit She Comes First, Ian Kerner singlehandedly waged battle against male sexual "ill-cliteracy," and women everywhere benefited from his "viva la vulva" philosophy of female pleasure. Now, in Passionista, it's time to learn all about what turns men on—and makes them stay on. In this point-by-point, "blow-by-blow" guide, Kerner makes giving as much fun as receiving as he covers every angle of male sexuality, unlocks the secrets of satisfaction, and offers knowledgeable answers to the questions every woman wonders about. His advice is the closest you'll ever come to waking up in a guy's skin and knowing what truly makes him sexually tick.
Written in the same witty, insightful, and utterly readable voice that has made She Comes First and Be Honest—You're Not That Into Him Either so popular, Passionista is the empowered woman's guide to enjoying sex to the fullest—and ensuring that he does the same.
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216 customer reviews
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<b> Ladies, here is what you need to know. Figure out what you, personally, like about what YOU do to yourself - then COMMUNICATE that to your partner. It really is that easy. Take time and explore his body - then COMMUNICATE with your partner about likes and dislikes. </b>
The book is insulting. Why as a female reader I need to get some cutesy She-Ra like nickname, such as "passionista;" can't I just learn about pleasuring a penis without some trite empowering moniker? I'm really not here to be all cheerleader rah-rah and make sure that my man takes his vitamins and exercises. (Seriously, that advice is in there, like my man is some kind of incompetent pet that requires me to help him be an adult.)
The book is written in an informational manner with a Q&A sprinkled throughout. All the questions and many quotes have a name attached to it, I guess because it seems more personable? Maybe the reader will be less likely to question if the questions or quotes are made up? The naivety of some questions, based on the age of the questioner, really made me think that they were fictitious questions. Some questions didn't even appear to have a direct answer, it was just a way to fill some tangent or agenda. The book is full of contradictions as well: There’s a chapter about exploring fantasies that includes role-playing, then later, poor Wanda (and the reader) is insulted at attempts to dress up and role play as "sexual flash and novelty."
There's tons of instances where over-generalizations paraded as facts are completely the opposite truths for myself as a woman, and any man I’ve been with (and I highly doubt I or any of my former partners are a unique flavor of humanity). This absurdity throughout the book made it lose credibility in my mind. A lot of the survey pieces or generalized comments were naive and offensive to both men and women. Here are just a few that come to mind:
- A survey about how women don't like or watch porn is incredibly ignorant, then to pile on that women don't order pornographic movies when traveling hotels is just fraught with incorrect assumptions. Women very much like porn, there's a whole industry related to female-friendly viewership and with the ubiquity of mobile devices, there's no need to pay however much for a hotel movie when mobile devices hold the key to free porn. I had to look up when this book was written - which was 2008 and not some quaint throwback era where women might get the vapors hearing the word 'penis.'
- Snuggling after sex? As a female, I hate it, yet my husband loves it - though according to this book, it's supposed to be the other way around.
- A general comment about how men don't like to take their socks off has never been something that's happened with any of the men I've been with or spoken to (because, seriously, I was on a mission to figure out the truth to these "facts").