- Paperback: 320 pages
- Publisher: Dell (April 1, 1996)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0440507545
- ISBN-13: 978-0440507543
- Product Dimensions: 6.1 x 0.7 x 9.1 inches
- Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 146 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,407,736 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Radical Honesty: How To Transform Your Life By Telling The Truth Paperback – April 1, 1996
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From Publishers Weekly
Gestalt therapist Blanton believes that lying is the major cause of human stress and advocates strict truthfulness as the key to achieving intimacy and calm.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From the Publisher
"Outrageously entertaining and wonderfully wise....apply it liberally throughout your life." --Gay Hendricks, Ph.D., co-author of Conscious Loving
"Dr. Blanton advocates a take-no-prisoners approach to honesty that would send Miss Manners shrieking from the room." --Elizabeth Hickey, The Washington Times
Top customer reviews
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I have always considered myself to be one of the "most honest" (this belief was part of the OCPD reality I created for myself that fueled my self lies and my disconnection with those around me). Within 1 chapter I realized the amount of lies I had been telling myself as I justified my "moralizim" and belief by being honest to everyone else but myself (and in reality this dishonesty allowed me to lie to others with righteous indignation).
This book has assisted me in transforming my life while discovering who I truly am. It has brought me closer to my wife then I ever thought possible. It has transformed my professional career and brought me deeper and more meaningful relationships with my family and my friends.
While I do not think this book is the end all be all. . . I do think that it is a light in the darkness and a core piece in having self love, experiencing love, being present, and having a joyful life.
I highly recommend this book and I have bought over 7 copies in the past month.
I see the negative reviews and I am grateful for their take on the book. That being said, if there is a chance that this book might bring you the healing, self love, and joy that it has brought me, my wife, my family, and my friends. . . it is worth the price and the time!
It is written in a casual tone, which is nice because it's the way you would talk to a friend. But he's also kind of nutty and some of his points were pretty out there.
Overall, I learned a ton from this book, and if you're trying to figure out how to live an honest life for yourself, this is a good place to start.
Very simply, it’s allowed me to be honest in a way I didn’t even recognize as possible, and to have the courage to be so. It’s illuminated ways in which I lie and deceive myself and my relationships, and how these lies cause stress, damage, and distance. I’ve since been healing and bridging the gap in these relationships, and it’s been a soul-shaking process.
Here’s just a small sampling of some of the gems I gleaned from this pure-nuggets-of-gold book:
“The assumptions that we so stubbornly cling to as truths are, in fact, decisions we have made about what “should be true” based on past experiences.”
In other words, we’re governed by lies, constantly.
“The purpose of expressing your anger directly instead of indirectly is to get in touch with the source of your own judgements.”
If you can get in touch with the source of your own judgements, you’ll not only find a reservoir of lies, but a jackpot on unreleased anger.
“Groups worth belonging to are people who support each other in staying in that area of insecurity and heightened experience and aliveness that threatens to kill your mind-made identity every day.”
I’ve since taken care to be in relationships that challenge me to grow and be my best self. What’s the lasting point of friendships if they aren’t designed to sculpt you into the greatest version of yourself? Fun got boring a long time ago.
> On page 163, there’s an powerful checklist for creating intimacy.
> On page 140, there’s the best step-by-step process I’ve ever seen on forgiveness.
> Between pages 143-150, you’ll learn the best way to release your anger.
You don’t need to read this whole book. In fact, if you have an aversion to super-radical and perhaps extreme ways of thinking, I recommend you only read 3 quarters of it. You can certainly avoid the Afterword. There's some unconventional radicalness contained in those pages, but there's no reason for it to stop you from gaining immense value from this book.
I think all perspectives ought to explored, with curiosity and consciousness, but that’s your prerogative. I happened to find the Afterward discouraging and it temporarily mildly tainted the content of the rest of the book for me. With some distance, I’ve been able to further examine how and why, but when I first read it (a couple of years ago), I went from being inspired and excited to being involuntarily weirded-out.
Regardless, this book has been a game-changer for me, and I recommend it, especially if you are passionate about pushing the envelope within your relationships and drinking in the intensity of what life has to offer. Practicing radical honesty isn’t easy, but it is significantly rewarding and freeing.
Most recent customer reviews
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