Customer Reviews: Raising Children That Other People Like to Be Around
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4.6 out of 5 stars
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on February 4, 2014
If you follow the advice in this book you will have polite respectful kids who can also think for themselves. I liked especially the chapter about respect. I also liked the idea of getting down on your knees to be at the toddler's level to communicate. Clear cut examples are helpful to any parent no matter the age of their children.
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on July 23, 2013
Richard Greenberg has written a wide-ranging real world guide to modern parenting with a specific issue as a starting point. We all want our kids to feel valued and loved but we also want (or should want) kids to understand that they're not the only people in the world. So kids' feelings should be respected, and kids should also respect the feelings of other people, whether it's their brothers and sisters or an older couple at the next table in a restaurant. Making this happen takes neither boot camp discipline or New Age permissiveness. It does require what the author calls common sense. What "common sense" parenting really means is made very clear in this book. I learned a lot from it.
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on April 12, 2014
My son is 11, and is an only child, though this was never our plan. I do not want him to reach adulthood as a spoiled individual who finds it impossible to work with other people. When this book showed up on the bestseller list, I decided to give it a read.
This book has a simple approach to dealing with the things that we face as parents. First, make the rules, then model the rules. Apply the rules. Very important: Respect Yourself! Lastly, teach all the time. It seems simple, but it also seems to work. I was surprised at how much I expected my son to know, to have somehow magically divined, without clearly articulating to him. One of the first things this book inspired me to do was to create a set of core rules that serve to define what we are all about. Once that was done, a lot of the frustration inherent in disciplinary tasks became a simple, "does (this behavior) exemplify (this core value)?" At age 11, my son's old enough to stop and analyze his behavior according to the standard. It has taken away a lot of argument, because it is not as if I am making up arbitrary rules. I am just asking HIM to decide if what he's doing will result in the expectation.
Another thing that has helped me a lot from this book is forgiving myself for my failures. This really goes along with the idea of teaching all the time. When I mess up, instead of becoming embarrassed, or feeling like I can never try to reprimand that particular behavior again, I use it as a teaching moment...I am not perfect. I will make mistakes. So will you. Growing up is about switching from a time when the mistakes are most common to a time when the desired behavior is most common. You'll have successes and failures in both cases, so you have to acknowledge a failure but then let it go.
I recommend this book for anyone who works with children, whether as a parent, teacher, caregiver, or whatever. Give them a set of expectations, and show them how those expectations look in real life. Don't let them get away with bad behavior...expect them to reach the goal, and soon enough most kids will come to expect it of themselves. Free yourself from the debilitating effects of guilt and "put your behind in the past!!"
(A little note to those of you who are raising the super-stubborn, like I am. The stage of expecting the good behavior IS trying. It is NOT easy. But I will tell you our does eventually come. For us, it took almost total social withdrawal, and it did take total media withdrawal. Once my son realized that I meant it when I said I would not allow him to behave that way in public, and I would enforce it by not letting him go places with his friends...or I would remove him immediately from a situation if his behavior warranted...he began to try a lot harder to be like the expectation.)
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on July 26, 2013
This is a great book. I have one child and the author is a father of four. He knows a thing or two about the challenges of raising kids. He offers some really easy tips on how to be a smarter and calmer parent and to respect your children and maintain their respect for you, the rules and themselves. I want that for my family. Parenting is daunting and there are a lot of parenting how-to books out there. This one has this thing called S.M.A.R.T.: Set an example, Make the rules, Apply the rules, Respect yourself, and Teach in all things. I really liked it. The author sounds really funny and fun and I bet his house was a nice one to grow up in.
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on January 5, 2014
Reading this book could save your children a lot of money on therapy. Richard's book is powerful in its simplicity. Letting readers into his personal life, he recounts anecdotes from his marriage and raising of four children, along with observations about their transition into fully functioning, well-adjusted adults. The advice he has mined from his experience is simple, smart and insightful. It's almost obvious, and yet it leaves you wondering, "why don't more parents do that?"
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on August 25, 2013
Raising Children That Other People Like to Be Around is terrific. It is not a medical journal -- it is fun reading.

We've already tried some of the suggestions in the book and had some great results.
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on April 12, 2014
After reading all the other rave reviews, I expected more. Did not discover any great insights, and the writer seemed to ramble at times. Lengthy, rambling discussions to make a single, simple point. If you can say it in five words, five hundred must be better?
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on November 5, 2013
Richard Greenberg has condensed thirty years' worth of common-sense parenting advice into this pithy and humorous book. It doesn't pretend to cover every base in child-rearing, and the author isn't an academic or medical professional, so the writing style is more conversational and straight forward. While this book is not intended to overlap the domain of clinicians; as a family lawyer, I do plan to give it to a number of my clients, who could benefit from Greenberg's advice on boundaries, setting examples, and parents setting a united front with their children. Well worth the few hours with a good cup of tea.
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on December 11, 2013
This is an insightful book for aspiring parents, current parents or any grandparents. We all have common sense, and the author taps into our own self-knowledge through anecdotes and analysis. It's a fantastic read!
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on May 31, 2014
This was a nice, easy read that I enjoyed. I plan to read it one more time in the near future. I appreciated the first hand stories that made it easy to read and relate to. It highlights some things that may be common sense, but are worth bringing to the fore (especially because common sense can fly out the window if you also happen to be sleep deprived!). I have to say I didn't 100% agree with the way the author handled things, but I did agree with most of it and even what I didn't agree with the principle was good I would have just handled it differently myself and that is ok. Overall enjoyed the book and now I need to figure out how to get my husband to read it :-)
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