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Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming parent-child relationships from reaction and struggle to freedom, power and joy Paperback – January 1, 2006
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Naomi Aldort is an eloquent proponent of the simple idea that children need love and validation, rather than control and behavior modification. The result is the disappearance of power struggles and the emergence of closeness and cooperation. Aldort teaches parents how to listen effectively when children express strong feelings, and how to recover their ability to love, validate and offer comfort to their children when they, themselves, are upset.
About the Author
Naomi Aldort is the author of Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, sold in thirteen languages. Her advice columns are published in progressive parenting magazines worldwide. Aldort offers guidance by phone/Skype internationally regarding all ages, babies through teens: attachment parenting; natural learning; peaceful and powerful parent-child relationships, self-realization, marriage and more. Products, phone sessions and free newsletter: www.authenticparent.com
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Interesting book. Makes me think of how I was as a child and how my parents dealt with me and why it may be the way I am now. I am not so sure about all the "clients" examples. It seems fairy tail or after school special to me, unless that is how all of her clients and children talk. It has helped me to understand why my toddler does certain things. I have always been more open minded and let my toddler be clingy, frightened without telling him to not be, explore, figure it out, or experience on his own than most parents. There are days he has a temper or some kind of frustration all day, at least if feels that way. This book has helped me keep calmer than I normally am and not yell or raise my voice at him (which I started doing after he was 2.5 years old). He is now a month shy of 3.
I have read many many parenting books, This speaks to me. It opens me up to see our parent child relationship first, enjoy our times together first, appreciate what we do have first, and stop worrying, criticizing, controlling, and thinking too much about whether my child behaves, or this or that.
The book also has practical accounts of dialogues between she, as a counselor, and her client parents. Situations of conversations between children and parents. Very easy to follow by reading actual exchanges, in addition to analysis and theories.
Practicing the teachings within can bring a gentle peace, acceptance, and love where there was once turbulence.