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Raising Resilient Children : Fostering Strength, Hope, and Optimism in Your Child Paperback – August 28, 2002
Frequently Bought Together
Child psychologists Robert Brooks and Sam Goldstein are too humble to promise a "sure bet" method for fostering resilience in all children, but their book Raising Resilient Children certainly does an impressive job of upping the ante. The authors open their comprehensive study with two bold questions: Why do many parents insist on pointing out their child's weaknesses and try--in vain--to mend these, when harnessing the child's strengths bolsters self-esteem? And how can parents change their erring ways to help these kids become thoughtful, confident adults? Their answer is a wisely crafted set of 10 essential parenting behaviors ("guideposts")--a prescription of sorts, for nurturing resilience in kids. Ironically, it's the parents who may reap the greatest rewards from putting these guideposts to work.
Drawing heavily from 50 years of combined clinical practice, Brooks and Goldstein conclude that a child's resilience grows its deepest roots in the home, nurtured by parents who incorporate healthy doses of empathy, practical optimism, respect, unconditional love, keen listening skills, and the patience to administer these values every day. Sounds logical, but the gap between knowledge and action is deceptively wide. The authors knowingly share a caseload of tales from their own clients' histories--familiar scenarios of well-meaning parents who say and do counterproductive things. But they also present a treasury of suggestions for righting the wrongs, including detailed steps for rewriting negative parenting scripts, teaching and modeling empathy, and creating opportunities for kids to act responsibly and compassionately. This timely, insightful book will prove an effective tool for parents who are willing to scrutinize--and improve upon--their own resilience. --Liane Thomas --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
From Publishers Weekly
In this practical handbook for parents, clinical psychologists Brooks and Goldstein draw on their considerable experience working with children and families to demonstrate that parents' core goal should be to instill in their children a sense of inner recourse. "A resilient child is an emotionally healthy child, equipped to successfully confront challenges and bounce back from setbacks," they contend, and to this end they provide 10 parenting "guideposts" for nurturing the kind of resilience that helps children thrive. From being empathic, to teaching problem-solving, to identifying "islands of competence" in order to help a child experience success, to editing and eliminating what the authors call "negative scripts" (what parents hear themselves saying and doing repeatedly, "with negligible beneficial results"), the guideposts are clearly delineated, first outlined in the introductory chapter and then expanded in individual chapters. In "Accepting Our Children for Who They Are," for instance, the authors discuss important abstractions--mapping out different personality types in children, addressing parental fears of being "mismatched" with their children--and then pack a practical punch with "Four Steps to Developing an Accepting Mindset with Your Child." An abundance of real-life examples encountered in the authors' own practices further helps to unite principle and theory with action, and while the subject-specific chapters encourage browsing, the down-to-earth strategies ensure that this title will be used as well as read. Though the book's straightforward, collaborative "we" yields a slightly lackluster voice, ultimately it doesn't impede the transmission of this truly valuable material.
Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Top Customer Reviews
These ten principles are "idealized" child "mindsets," which parental behavior supports. The authors do not criticize parents for not supporting their children all the time. Instead, they give numerous suggestions and examples of what a parent can do to improve their communication with their children.
The tone of this book is "talky" and easy to read. Perhaps 2/3rds of the examples are about children; the rest, adolescents. Almost all examples come from the authors' extensive psychotherapy and family therapy practices.
I have some quibbles with the logic of some of their conclusions, but, in general, parents will find this an easy and helpful read. Although the topic of "resilience" is a part of the newly emerging field of "social-emotional learning" (SEL), educators will find this book harder to use. The children in the examples attend schools, but there is no description of how to implement a resilience curriculum.
The authors also publish a workbook, "Raising resilient children: A curriculum to foster strength, hope, and optimism in children." This workbook is tied to a video that the authors have produced (but which is not sold with the workbook; the video must be ordered from the publisher and I have not seen it on Amazon.com). This workbook provides exercises with which they can build the competence to support their children. This workbook also gives the gist of their argument, and teaches parents directly how to implement the skills to support their child.
This is a 9-week course covering: (1) Teaching and conveying empathy; (2) re-writing negative scripts; (3) Discplining in ways that promote self-discipline and growth; (4) Making decisions, solving problems; (5) loving children in ways that help them feel special and appreciated; (6) learning from mistakes; (7) Expecting success, "islands of competence"; (8) hope and courage.
It is accompanied by a video tape (not available from Amazon.com) but which would be good for persons planning parent groups or in-service for teachers.
The age-group that the authors write about is children, but with some modifications (especially with discipline) it could be applied to adolescents.
This book is an easy beginning to the practical aspects of resilience education. It is graphically good looking and substantively good.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
One of the best "parenting" books around. A needed addition to the parent library.Published 1 month ago by Dr. Wayne D. Samuelson
A decent read and great information. I highly recommend investing your time and money in reading this book.Published on August 31, 2014 by Phoenix7
The book is thorough. It has case by case examples that I could relate and apply. This book gives great insight into the minds of children / teens. Read morePublished on June 14, 2013 by Cristie Brewer