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Real Sex for Real Women Hardcover – October 17, 2008
"Rebound" by Kwame Alexander
Don't miss best-selling author Kwame Alexander's "Rebound," a new companion novel to his Newbery Award-winner, "The Crossover,"" illustrated with striking graphic novel panels. Pre-order today
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About the Author
Best-selling author and renowned sex therapist, Dr. Laura Berman is America's leading expert in female sexual health. She is the founder and director of the Berman Center in Chicago, which specializes in sexual health and therapy, and she is assistant clinical professor of psychiatry and obstetrics/gynecology at the Feinberg School of Medicine at Northwestern University.
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Top customer reviews
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Upon reading this book, it is important to do so with an open mind. My wife actually read this book without my knowledge and only after reading she stated it a few times which made me read it too. The first few chapters of the book teach the importance of understanding the female mind and anatomy. It states that a woman's sexual drive and desires is more mental whereas the man's sex drive is more instinctual. Once the female mind is stimulated, their body language will follow. However, male desires are less about emotional feelings but more about a physical urge. The book uses the example of women needing to be warmed up, like a stove, with foreplay being the key role. Men are referenced to a microwave; it only takes a few seconds for us to get turned on.
"Real Sex for Real Women" discusses why a person may feel intimidated when expressing their needs and wants to their conservative loved one. Some women feel like their sexual needs don't align with other roles they play in their life. Therefore, the woman will suppress her sexual wants due to feeling ashamed. Instead of confiding in her husband, she will push him away sexually to console or comfort herself if she feels her spouse will look at her in a demeaning way. The book states some men assume their wife won't perform or partake in certain sexual fantasies, which in return causes men to begin a marital affair. They instantly assume their wife is too conservative, due to her professional role or her role as a parent, and they avoid asking for what they truly want and need sexually.
Most individuals understand the importance of communication and healthy dialogue. This book state, when trying to maintain a marriage or any relationship, confiding one's sexual wants is vital. Often, marriages break down due to either finance or romance. It is important to have the confidence and maturity to say, "I'm unhappy with our sex life, let's try something new." "Real Sex for Real Women" aids couples in identifying when a sexual problem is arising and this book arms couples with the tools to get your intimacy back on track.
As I read this book, I realized that while it looks basic, it isn't as basic as it seems. The info is just very clearly communicated. I think that one of the goals in this book is to talk about sex explicitly but respectfully. This is an excellent book for women who are uncomfortable talking about sex or talking about their bodies and their partner's body. This book is also good for women who struggle with with sex due to poor body image.
I found that many of the women in this book were not skinny models. There were women of different ages, and different sizes. There were small breasted women and average to larger breasted women. Many women had round figures with a bit of a tummy. No one in the book is really big, but you are not going to find that in any book. The pics showing sexual positions were used with averagely healthy weight women. But that was necessary for clarity IMO. And no, I am not thin! Or even close to thin!
I will admit that the book is not quite what I expected otherwise. From seeing Dr. Berman on the show, my impression was that it would include more case studies and information on what actually goes on in her sessions and how she helps women overcome specific issues. Instead the book is more of a "Jot of Sex" type book, with tips on improving one's sex life complete with colorful fonts and a magazine type layout.
It's not a complete disappointment or waste of time but it's probably not the best book out there.