From Library Journal
With these two books, the publisher enters the self-help arena, and the results are disappointing. The usually sound Leman (Bringing Up Kids Without Tearing Them Down) misfires here. In the book's first half, he stresses the importance of individual birth order and personality type (sanguine, melancholic, phlegmatic, and choleric) in defining one's true self. He then contradicts those arguments for predisposition by claiming, "You are the way you are because of the choices you have made in response to your surrounding environment." Leman would like readers "to rethink everything [they've] been doing," but he doesn't explain why. Vaguely Christian in tone, the book lacks anything practical and is filled with fluffy anecdotes about celebrities, e.g., Charlton Heston is presented as a typical first born. Not recommended. Best-selling Christian author Harley's work is similarly superficial. The titular metaphor characterizes people in relationships. Freeloaders are "only willing to give and receive care if it comes almost effortlessly." " 'Renters' are willing to improve their ability to care as long as it is in their best interest to do so." "Buyers [are] committed to providing exclusive and permanent care in a romantic relationship." This scheme takes the author (His Needs, Her Needs) only so far; while clever enough for a little while, the book ultimately dehumanizes and oversimplifies complex human relationships. Pass.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From the Back Cover
Know yourself-then reinvent a better you! Dr. Kevin Leman has fantastic news for those ready to create positive changes in their lives. Whatever flaws you think you have can be reworked and changed-for good. Unlock the secrets of your birth order, your childhood memories, your "love language," and your natural personality bent. The Real You is an informative and fascinating guide through these four personality indicators that have shaped you into the person you are today. Once you really understand yourself-your strengths, weaknesses, predispositions, the forces of nature, and your family background-there will be no holding you back, promises Dr. Leman. You can build on who you already are to become your personal best in your relationships, in your career, and at home. Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known psychologist, humorist, radio and TV personality, and best-selling author of The New Birth Order Book, Making Children Mind without Losing Yours, The Birth Order Connection, Sex Begins in the Kitchen, and Adolescence Isn't Terminal-It Just Feels Like It. He is founder and co-host of realFAMILIES and president of Couples of Promise. He and his wife, Sande, live in Tucson, Arizona.
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.