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Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D

Reinforcements: How to Get People to Help You Hardcover – June 12, 2018

by Heidi Grant (Author)

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Humans have a natural instinct to help others.

Imagine walking up to a stranger on the subway and asking them for their seat. What about asking a random person on the street if you could borrow their phone? If the idea makes you squeamish, you're not alone--social psychologists have found that doing these very things makes most of us almost unbearably uncomfortable.

But here's the funny thing: even though we hate to ask for help, most people are wired to be helpful. And that's a good thing, because every day in the modern, uber-collaborative workplace, we all need to know when and how to call in the cavalry.

However, asking people for help isn't intuitive; in fact, a lot of our instincts are wrong. As a result, we do a poor job of calling in the reinforcements we need, leaving confused or even offended colleagues in our wake.

This pragmatic book explains how to get it right. With humor, insight, and engaging storytelling, Heidi Grant, PhD, describes how to elicit helpful behavior from your friends, family, and colleagues--in a way that leaves them feeling genuinely happy to lend a hand.

Whether you're a first-time manager or a seasoned leader, getting people to pitch in is what leadership is. Fortunately, people have a natural instinct to help other human beings; you just need to know how to channel this urge into what it is you specifically need them to do. It's not manipulation. It's just management.

Print length

208 pages
Language

English
Publisher

Harvard Business Review Press
Publication date

June 12, 2018
Dimensions

5.75 x 1 x 8.5 inches
ISBN-10

9781633692350
ISBN-13

978-1633692350
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Editorial Reviews

Review

Named a Business Book of the Month by the Financial Times

Advance Praise for Reinforcements:

Daniel H. Pink, author of When and Drive--
"Everyone--seriously, everyone--will benefit from reading Reinforcements. With graceful prose and a firm grasp of the science, Heidi Grant shows how to seek assistance in ways that leave both the asker and the helper feeling positive, effective, and ready to help again."

Dorie Clark, author, Entrepreneurial You and Reinventing You--
"No one can do it alone. Whatever your project, mission, or job, you'll almost certainly need assistance to succeed. Heidi Grant's Reinforcements shows you the path forward."

Art Markman, Founding Director, Human Dimensions of Organizations program, University of Texas; author, Smart Thinking and Brain Briefs--
"As always, Grant provides a masterful blend of theory and practical advice that is as entertaining as it is useful."

David Burkus, author, Friend of a Friend--
"This brief but brilliant book will have a lasting impact on how you ask for (and get) more help in your work and life."

Thomas Wedell-Wedellsborg, author, Innovation as Usual--
"A powerful, practical book on how to attract allies and gain support for your ideas. Required reading for anyone who wants to get things done with the help of others."

Robert Sutton, professor, Stanford University; author, The Asshole Survival Guide and coauthor of Scaling Up Excellence--
"Reinforcements is a delightful and surprising masterpiece. Grant's compelling weave of stories and studies shows how to ask for help (and how not to), and--believe it or not--why, when you ask others for help, you do them a big favor."

About the Author

Heidi Grant, PhD, is a social psychologist who researches, writes, and speaks about the science of motivation. She is Global Director of Research & Development at the NeuroLeadership Institute and serves as Associate Director of Columbia's Motivation Science Center. She received her doctorate in social psychology from Columbia University.

Product details

ASIN ‏ : ‎ 1633692353
Publisher ‏ : ‎ Harvard Business Review Press (June 12, 2018)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9781633692350
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1633692350
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 11.2 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.75 x 1 x 8.5 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #696,707 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #2,537 in Communication & Social Skills (Books)
- #2,795 in Business Motivation & Self-Improvement (Books)
- #2,806 in Motivational Management & Leadership

Customer Reviews:
72 ratings

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Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D

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Heidi Grant Halvorson is a social psychologist, and Associate Director of Columbia's Motivation Science Center. Her research has focused on understanding why some people give up when their goals give them trouble, while others can rise to the challenge. She is the author of SUCCEED, NINE THINGS SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE DO DIFFERENTLY, FOCUS, and THE EIGHT MOTIVATIONAL CHALLENGES. Through her books, articles, and her blogs (99u, Harvard Business Review, Psychology Today, Fast Company), she hopes to help people understand that ANYONE can reach their goals, and give them the scientifically-tested strategies they need to succeed.

In addition to her work as author and co-editor of the highly-regarded academic book The Psychology of Goals (Guilford, 2009), she has authored papers in her field's most prestigious journals, including the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, European Journal of Social Psychology, and Judgment and Decision Making. She has received grants from the National Science Foundation for her research on goals and achievement. She also serves on the Board of Advisors for Columbia University Business School's Motivation Science Center. Her work has been praised by Carol Dweck, Matthew Kelly, Dr. Edward Hallowell, and Peter Bregman, among many others.

Dr. Grant Halvorson is a member of the Association for Psychological Science, and the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, and was recently elected a Fellow of the Society for Experimental Social Psychology. She gives frequent invited addresses and speaks regularly at national conferences, and is available for speaking engagements and workshops, primarily in education and management. She received her PhD from Columbia University.

You can contact Heidi at heidi@heidigranthalvorson.com

Visit her website at www.heidigranthalvorson.com

Customer reviews

4.3 out of 5

72 global ratings

5 star		58%
4 star		26%
3 star		9%
2 star		3%
1 star		4%

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Top reviews from the United States

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Chaze Patrick

The Effectiveness of Helping

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on June 19, 2020

Verified Purchase

Dr. Halvorson provide some crucial tips and examples on how help can be facilitated in different settings. I really enjoyed the last chapter at the end. Many of the concerts were tied in make sense of what the author was trying to convey in her overall message.

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on July 12, 2021

Verified Purchase

The theme of this book is interesting, but it doesn't keep me hooked as I expected.
Maybe giving /getting help is really a case-by-case thing, the book is offering just the simplest guidance for our information, not for the execution.

Helpful

Amazon Customer

Good, useful information.

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on April 28, 2021

Verified Purchase

Practical advice! I already used this effectively at my job in corporate America. I would recommend as it's a short, informative read.

Helpful

Bruce1212

Smart, fast paced, enjoyable

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 25, 2020

Verified Purchase

For those who resist asking for help or even a consult, this book delivers a smart, fast paced, enjoyable read. Pleasantly surprised with the actionable nature of this book.

2 people found this helpful

Helpful

Antonio Pelaez Barcelo

Directo, preciso, entretenido y de gran ayuda

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on December 16, 2018

Verified Purchase

Gracias al estilo sencillo, simpático y muy documentado de la autora, no sólo se lee con facilidad, sino que además ves en seguida cómo aplicar sus consejos y conocimientos a la vida real. Y con ello no sólo conseguir que te ayuden, sino además ser de ayuda y sentirte eficaz.

Helpful

Translate review to English

CKO

Research-based, practical, and a quick fun read to boot

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on December 21, 2018

Verified Purchase

Really useful advice for everyday life, business settings, or fundraising. Does a great job of applying research findings to practical situations, and addressing the emotional issues raised by "making an ask." You may find yourself reading sections out loud to your spouse or colleague.

2 people found this helpful

Helpful

Trusted Customer

Why we should all feel comfortable asking for help.

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 28, 2019

Verified Purchase

Excellent research on understanding that asking for favors improve relationships and outcomes. Gets rid of the guilt of needing others and reinforces the idea that people feel better when they help you. Brilliant work.

2 people found this helpful

Helpful

S. Ignelzi

It was a gift

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on February 14, 2019

Verified Purchase

Gift

Helpful

Top reviews from other countries

William Jordan

excellent short study of asking for, and giving, help

Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on October 21, 2018

Verified Purchase

This excellent short book explains why we are reluctant to ask for help (it gives rise to all sorts of uncertainty) and we therefore underestimate the likelihood of receiving help, and don't understand that asking for help may make others like us more (Benjamin Franklin's borrowing of a book from a rival makes the point brilliantly - if I've lent Franklin a book, I must like him and want to help him); how we need to ask for help clearly and to a defined individual and not on a quid pro quo basis; and then how to couch requests so they will be met - appeal to in-group identity, or the identity someone aspires to (three year old children like to be 'a helper' rather than just 'help'), and ensure that the helper can see that their help will be effective (ie it really will help us - the story here of a children's story about a tree who is constantly exploited by a human, but who can feel at least its help has been effective). On the giving side of the equation, giving actually makes us feel good, but we need to see the good we've done in action - and we should remember this.

Along the way you will learn that painkillers can treat a broken heart (page 12); about the 'door in the face' technique (ask for one thing then another - repeatedly saying 'no' isn't easy), and all the ways we keep up a positive self-image (denial, ascribing success to ourselves and failure to circumstance, downward comparison) - and much more.

So this is a book that is very learned but wears its learning lightly; and does all it can to be practical. I very much enjoyed reading it and would recommend it strongly to others.

One person found this helpful

Allan Kelly

Informative & easy to read

Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on October 5, 2018

Verified Purchase

Rear combination: a book which is very information and an easy read.
Not sure how many of these lessons I can't actually put into practice but a) I'm sure I can a few of them and b) simply knowing how people respond is good to know.

Jorge Campos

If you're human you need to read this book... Understanding giving and asking for help

Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on January 4, 2019

Verified Purchase

This book is really insightful in addressing the mechanics of asking for and giving help.
The self-imposed friction that we apply when considering asking for help without clearly thinking on how the helper will feel (in reality not in perception).
Examples abound in how we forgot how well we felt about giving help at the time we need to ask for it.
Really, read this book.

One person found this helpful

Joseph George A

Easy Reading of practical skills in influencing others

Reviewed in India 🇮🇳 on January 28, 2019

Verified Purchase

Well researched, relevant digest of practical skills well laid out through the book. From Cialdini to Neuro Leadership, the range is impressive and the perceptual positions between the influencer and the influenced seen very subtly

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