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Reinventing Your Life: The Breakthough Program to End Negative Behavior...and Feel Great Again Kindle Edition
|Length: 380 pages||Word Wise: Enabled||Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled|
|Page Flip: Enabled||
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“Several of the most painful petards upon which people become hoisted during an unhappy childhood are neatly dispatched here by two cognitive therapists, who attack 11 common ‘lifetraps’—destructive patterns that underlie a variety of emotional problems. Young and Klosko ably demonstrate how to deal with issues of abandonment, dependence, trust, social rejection, emotional deprivation, failure and vulnerability. They provide meaningful case histories, perceptive descriptions, diagnostic tests and a variety of nugget-sized, easily understood lists detailing the causes, danger signs and effects of negative impulses and actions, as well as ways to short-circuit them.”—Publishers Weekly
“Using illustrations from case studies, the authors describe each lifetrap, discuss its origins in childhood experience, and provide a questionnaire for self-assessment. They then offer a program for change using techniques ranging from experiential (getting in touch with your inner child) to cognitive (writing a ‘case’ against your lifetrap) and behavioral (identifying specific behaviors to be changed).”—Library Journal
From Library Journal
- Lucille Boone, San Jose P.L., Cal.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
- File Size : 1070 KB
- Language: : English
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Publication Date : May 1, 1994
- Print Length : 380 pages
- Publisher : Plume; Reprint Edition (May 1, 1994)
- ASIN : B0776JJ6L8
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Enhanced Typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Lending : Not Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #36,741 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
Top reviews from the United States
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Then I found this book. It all seems familiar. There is nothing radical in it, but seeing things presented as lifetraps (schemas) allowed me to see myself in a new way. I recognized myself in the subjugation lifetrap. As difficult as it was I started to assert myself, to ask for help and be honest with myself about my own passive-aggressiveness and the symptoms of my depression started lifting! As soon as I was manipulated into doing something I didn't want to do, I could feel the depression symptoms returning. I later told that person I would not be able to help after all and the depression symptoms lifted again.I am looking forward to finding myself in some of the other lifetraps.
This book is not a cure. I still have bipolar disorder and I still take meds. However, I consider this book to have been an important piece of my progress toward a more normal life.
The packaging was very nice and the book came very quickly. Highly recommend this book and this seller!!
Overall, I liked the book. I gained some insight into some of my own negative behavior patterns, and it certainly gave me some things to think about as far as relationships! With a foreword by renowned psychiatrist Aaron Beck, the book held great promise for insightful psychological breakthrough. I enjoyed reading about the different lifetrap patterns and how each could be unknowingly cultivated in a child by parents who are either absent, addicted, or well meaning and just uneducated. Young and Klosko go into great detail of childhood origins of each behavior pattern, giving examples of each and an anecdotal story of how some of their patients (of course with privacy protected) learned to overcome the self defeating behavior. The book was an easy read, used little medical jargon that was not well explained to the layperson, and will get you thinking.
All that being said, there were some negative points, as to why I felt it only earned 4 stars. For starters, the information can be somewhat dated. The book has a copyright of 1993, so some of the interactions and anecdotes are not as applicable to the current world. That in of itself, however, is a minor flaw. The biggest issue I had with the book was the fact that there were just not enough time and words spent on how to fix the behaviors and how long that was going to take the average person. While a list of steps to take to remedy the behavior was presented with some explanation, I felt that wasn't enough to really assist a person in making drastic changes in thinking and interaction patterns without a professional therapist to assist. Therapy is great, but the point of a self help book is to help yourself, so they could have spent some more time explaining just how to implement these recovery steps and give more detail into how each of the examples did so in their lives. Compared to the amount of information provided on childhood origins (which provide great insight, but that is only half the battle), I think the implementation of change sections were lacking.
In the end, I do recommend the book for use with your therapist in helping to determine and solve some self defeating behavior. I'm a huge fan of education and self improvement, so if you enjoy the same, this book might be worth your time to check out.
I have shared the book with numerous friends and family members. The feedback has been positive and what people tell me again and again is that the book gave them hope...hope of conquering behaviors that interfered with relationships, career advancement, handling money prudently. It is very powerful, so if you want to feel better about yourself and you've been wondering how to make that happen, give this book a try. I am confident you will feel you got your money's worth.
Helps identify unconscious behaviors that are blocking progress in your life and solutions, practices to change the behaviors
Not hokey not a quick fix
Very valuable if your really interested in understanding why the same things keep going wrong in your life
I was recommended this by my therapist and we worked through it together, but it's entirely possible to do it yourself
Top reviews from other countries
This book really has changed my life! I have never understood myself, and have never understood what makes me tick, what makes me do the things I do, and behave in the way I do. I often got into situations and then got frustrated and unhappy as a result.
This book has helped me unravel ALL of my life from the day I was born. It has helped me piece together so many different aspects, to the point where I was able to sum up my life in a short 1000 word essay and completely discover who I was.
I didn't read chapter one of this book, I was a bit impatient so went to straight to chapter 2 - the quiz. Out of 11 of the lifetraps - 8 of them were problems for me. Ouch!
I then read chapters 3,4,5 to understand more about lifetraps in general and how we respond to them. Fascinating insight in to my life already. I then did the longer questionnaires for the 8 potential lifetraps and whittled it down to 5 confirmed lifetraps. I then set about reading just these 5 chapters. I would NOT recommend you jump into this book without first doing the test in chapter 2 and working out your lifetraps - this is really important.
I have to say that reading these chapters was like reading a biography - it was ME - in a book!! It was a very emotional time. Not only did the book tell me about the lifetraps but it provided me with practical advice on how to stop them controlling my life.
This book - in combination with reaching the lowest point in my life at the end of 2014 has been a revelation and I cannot praise it enough. Buy it.
My abusive ex partner borrowed the book after me. After reading the first few chapters, he has taken it upon himself to calculate how much money he stole from me over the years, and has taken a second job to pay it back. He apologized for the way he treated me when I was with him, and for the first time I see genuine empathy and emotional connection in his eyes. We have been broken up for 1.5 years, and in that time he was unable to connect with to anyone, let alone me. While the book didn't come in time to save that relationship, it may have at least saved his self worth, and prevented him from victimizing anyone else in the way he hurt me. This is such a powerful book.