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The Ring Makes All the Difference: The Hidden Consequences of Cohabitation and the Strong Benefits of Marriage Paperback – September 1, 2011

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Glenn T. Stanton (Author)
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4.4 out of 5 stars 37 customer reviews
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 160 pages
  • Publisher: Moody Publishers; New Edition edition (September 1, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 080240216X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0802402165
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.4 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #527,111 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 starsFascinating Results from 40 Years of Research Studies
By WatermarkedOne on January 16, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition
I've often heard my peers say things like that living together is a safe way to "test out" a relationship to see if it is going to work before you make a permanent commitment to marriage, or that they are "practically married" and don't need a piece of paper to solidify their relationship. I confess I've often been rather tongue tied, not knowing how to respond.

When I saw that there was a book compiling the findings of four decades worth of scientific studies on the impact that living together has on relationships, I was instantly interested. This fascinating book explains research findings on the effects of cohabitation on a wide range of relational issues and shows some surprising results, such as that:

1) Couples who live together before getting married are 50-80% (!) more likely to get divorced than couples who have not lived together beforehand (l. 949)

2) The rate of violence for cohabiting couples is twice as high as for married couples, and the rate for "severe" violence is nearly five times greater (l. 679.) Similarly, women living with boyfriends are nine times more likely to be murdered by their partner than married women (l. 695)

3) Live-in boyfriends are nearly four times more likely to cheat than husbands (l. 704), and men who cohabited before marriage are more likely to cheat after they get married

4) Married men typically spend 8 more hours a week helping with housework than live-in boyfriends (l. 753) and contribute more financially (l.2084)

5) Living together without relational clarity/commitment tends to foster controlling and manipulative behavior patterns, which continue into marriage (l.Read more ›
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5.0 out of 5 starsCrisp, Clear, Candid - One of Stanton's Best!
By Jules loves to shop on September 13, 2011
Format: Paperback
Focus on the Family's Glenn Stanton is a student of not only the social science surrounding and supporting traditional marriage, but also the culture, both religious and secular, in which it resides. With a strong command of these two spheres, this makes Stanton the ideal author to examine the chronic but worsening trend of cohabitation.

In the early 1970s, at the apex of the Cultural Revolution, American model Lauren Hutton, succinctly put to words the fears of her generation. In an interview with Time Magazine, Ms. Hutton was unapologetic when acknowledging that she lived with her boyfriend. When asked about the prospect of marriage, she said that it was "great for taxes, necessary for children, abominable for romance."

That such a lie took root amidst the tumultuous turn of culture's tide is not surprising. However, as Stanton convincingly points out with grace, just believing a lie doesn't make it true. Over three decades removed from Hutton's progressive perspective, there is conclusive evidence that the cohabitation experiment has failed, and miserably so.

"This is a rare instance where there's a chasm the size of the Grand Canyon between what many young adults believe and the proven reality of their experience," Glenn writes. "And it is not the moralizing preachers and traditionalists saying so."

Stanton wades through the scientific research indicating that cohabiting couples, if they ever marry, are 50% to 80% more likely to divorce than those who live apart prior to the big day. Cohabiting couples are also at much greater risk of suffering "serious relational impairments" - a gentle term for general discord and dysfunction.Read more ›
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5.0 out of 5 starsThis is a must read!
By holly11 on September 14, 2011
Format: Paperback
Cohabitation. Many couples go this route to "test drive" their partner for marriage. What they don't know is how detrimental it is to their future relationship. Using current statistics, Glenn Stanton presents the case that couples who live together before marriage have a higher rate of divorce than those who don't.

I had often heard that cohabitation was bad for a relationship, but I hadn't heard the statistics and reasoning behind it, beyond the church circles that say it's wrong. Stanton does an excellent job of presenting the fact in an unbiased manner. In fact, if I didn't know that Stanton comes from a Christian viewpoint, beyond the first and last couple chapters, I would think I was reading a secular sociological study. What is interesting to me is Stanton's conclusion that God knew what He was doing when He commanded against fornication. All of the statistics point to God's perfect plan.

This is the second book I've read and reviewed by Glenn Stanton. I have also read a lot of his material on Boundless.org, and am impressed with his research skills and interesting take on today's issues.

This is a great book - one I think would be great for anyone who counsels or works with youth or singles, or married couples.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Moody Publishers, through NetGalley. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 starsExcellent resource for anyone who does counselling or has young adult...

A fascinating and well-documented summary of why people should get married! First from a secular perspective, and towards the end, from a Christian perspective. Read more

Published 24 days ago by janet l anderson
3.0 out of 5 starsThree Stars

Definitely a book to read before a person starts to date.

Published 5 months ago by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 starsFive Stars

Helpful.

Published 5 months ago by Roger Woodrome
5.0 out of 5 starsJust getting started reading this but so far it's great! It not only...

Just getting started reading this but so far it's great! It not only gives the biblical teaching but back it up with scientific proof which is great for agnostic or scientific... Read more

Published 12 months ago by Sharon Tompkins
5.0 out of 5 starsVery helpful book. Gives some concrete facts to the ...

Very helpful book. Gives some concrete facts to the thoughts our young people think they'll attain by their choices...

Published 13 months ago by seal beach mom
5.0 out of 5 starsSolidify your thinking on life in general and yours in particular!...

Just a must read for those folks that are assessing marriage and the value of committment.

Published 15 months ago by Jerry Franklin
4.0 out of 5 starsFour Stars

Poor grammar throughout.o

Published 17 months ago by Eddie Flash
5.0 out of 5 starsMarriage really is the better way.

Cohabitation and sex outside of marriage is so destructive to the couple and their children. The terrible thing is that it is especially bad for the woman. Read more

Published 17 months ago by E. schmitt
5.0 out of 5 starsFive Stars

Brand new!

Published 17 months ago by Jean A Culver
4.0 out of 5 starsVery grounding read at a pivotal time

In a relationship with the guy I want to marry and was tempted to move in with him. This book reaffirmed my desire to get married first.

Published 18 months ago by Candace Brekka

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