Rodney Lacroix

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About Rodney Lacroix

Rodney Lacroix is just one of those guys. He's one of those guys that make you say, "You know, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy."

THAT? That's Rodney Lacroix.

Rodney Lacroix lives in southern New Hampshire. He is the proud biological father of two amazing children and step-ological father of two stepamazing stepchildren.

He also likes to invent terms.

Rodney Lacroix has been writing about his misadventures for years. He's done stand-up comedy, emceed charity events and has hung out with many celebrities.

Rodney's books have won him multiple humor awards and have appeared on international best-seller lists. He is worshipped in most third-world countries and is known as "El Chupacabra.' Perhaps you've heard of him.

Maybe you shouldn't believe anything he says. DO read his books, though. He's hysterical.

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Author Updates

Titles By Rodney Lacroix

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But Did You Die?: Setting the Parenting Bar Low (I Just Want to Pee Alone Book 5) Jun 11, 2017

by Jen Mann, Kim Bongiorno, Victoria Fedden, Amy Flory, Rodney Lacroix, Alessandra Macaluso, Susan Maccarelli, Kim Forde, Kelcey Kintner, Kathryn Leehane

( 199 )

$6.99

Everyone has terrible parenting advice, but ours actually works!

But Did You Die? is the fifth hilarious installment in the New York Times bestselling I Just Want to Pee Alone series. It is a collection of terrible (but also kind of good) parenting advice from some of the funniest moms and dads on the 'net (plus that one super helpful childless friend we all have who loves to tell us we're parenting wrong).

So put your kids in front of the TV and let them eat junk food while you read this book and laugh your tail off.

We set the bar low so you can feel better about your parenting skills. You're welcome.

Featuring the writing of:

Jen Mann of People I Want to Punch in the Throat™
Elizabeth Argyropoulos
Kim Bongiorno
Julie Burton
Joel Ryan
Jeff Vrabel

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

The Fall of Baby Hitler: Sometimes Evil Wears a Diaper Dec 16, 2015

by Cameron Croy, Noreen Conway, Rodney Lacroix

( 14 )

$0.99

Bobert McGee is just a regular guy. Anonymous in his job and his life, Bobert's singular obsession is to make a difference in the world. He wants to be noticed. He wants to be famous. He wants to matter.

Bobert's desires come true when he stumbles across a time machine for sale on an Internet shopping page. Scrambling all the savings he has, he buys the machine with the intention of changing history and improving the world for all of mankind. In doing so, Bobert will finally become the man he's always wanted to be.

Bobert will become the man who saved the lives of millions. Bobert will be the man who changed history. Bobert will be the man who stopped Hitler.

But Bobert is a giant wimp, so he'll need to stop Hitler when it's easy for him to do so. Going back in time to when Hitler was a baby should make this whole thing easier, right?

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

Perhaps I've Said Too Much: A Great Big Book of Messing with People Apr 27, 2016

by Rodney Lacroix, Ross Cavins

( 87 )

$5.63

This book is dedicated to the pranksters and jokers who all walk among us and for their hapless victims who are looking for ways to get back at those sons of bitches.

Whether you're carving evil messages into your coworker's banana peel or telling your kids that, yes, raisins are actually dehydrated people, there's a certain, sinister-yet-fun draw to playing jokes or pranks, or generally just messing around with people.

This book will give you some great ideas.

In Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much (the much anticipated follow-up to the heralded, award-winning Things Go Wrong For Me), Rodney Lacroix gives the reader some insight on professionally living the prankster life. No one is safe, including Rodney himself as not all of his antics go entirely as planned. Join him as he spins some yarns, gives you some new ideas and lets you relive the catastrophic consequences of jokes gone terribly, horribly wrong.

Complete with original hand-drawn artwork and graphics, one-two punch Brain Nuggets, and the ever-popular Draw Something Files, Perhaps will not disappoint.* (Assumes you are an immature child who enjoys potty humor and making fart noises with your armpits.)

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

Things Go Wrong For Me (when life hands you lemons, add vodka): Hysterically true tales (COMEDY, SHORT STORIES) Apr 27, 2016

by Rodney Lacroix, Ross Cavins

( 208 )

$5.99

FINALIST - 2013 Next Generation Indie Book Awards (Humor/Humour)
FINALIST - 2013 National Indie Excellence Book Awards (Humor/Humour)

Think you've got it bad? You ain't seen nothing yet.

Murphy's Law, meet Rodney's Law. If it can go wrong, it has already happened to Rodney Lacroix in the worst, most comedic way humanly possible. And you'll find all of those stories right here, in full-color detail, right in this book.

Things Go Wrong For Me (when life hands you lemons, add vodka) is a memoir of sorts, a road map of Rodney Lacroix's haywire life thus far. If you think you're having a bad day, this book is a great reminder that it can always get worse. This is typically at Rodney Lacroix's expense, sadly for him.

There's no doubt, if you enjoy snorting milk through your nose, and you're drinking milk right now ... you're going to love this book.

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

The Sins of the Father: A Short-Read Psychological Thriller Inspired by True Events (CRIME, MYSTERY, SUSPENSE) Sep 1, 2016

by Rodney J. Lacroix

( 13 )

$0.99

Inspired by his real-life experiences, award-winning humor author Rodney Lacroix takes you on a dark journey with his first entry into the world of dramatic literature in "The Sins of the Father."

Sometimes, when lives are shattered, families destroyed and dreams obliterated, the only recourse is to put pen to paper. "The Sins of the Father" short-read chapter series is the raw emotion of a writer's catharsis, his therapy put forth in a fictional short story based on a catastrophic life event.

Rodney J. Lacroix is typically known for his award-winning humor and comedy writing.

But here, within the pages of this powerfully compelling story, he reveals a darker side. In "The Sins of the Father,"he gives you insight on what it's like to be trapped inside a horrific nightmare when you're neither the criminal nor victim. A memory of a true crime and hidden past decades old gives life to this short story, and the final outcome which serves as a resolution that can only live in fiction.

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

The Vasectomy Diaries: A Tale of Hard Decisions, Empty Emissions and Tiny Incisions (comedy, humor) Feb 1, 2017

by Rodney Lacroix

( 52 )

$3.99

"This is a GENIUS book. You guys have to pick this up." - Jenny McCarthy, from "The Jenny McCarthy Show" interview with Rodney Lacroix on June 15, 2017

From the best-selling humorist and comedy author of "Perhaps I've Said Too Much" and "Romantic as Hell."

Written in Rodney's trademark comedic style with spot-on timing, "The Vasectomy Diaries" is a hilarious, frank and hysterically wince-inducing account of one man's journey through the procedure.

Rodney takes you along with him on his quest to shoot blanks with a fast-paced, brain-storming diary format. Starting with the moment he makes the life-changing decision while experiencing a migraine during a kid's birthday party, all the way through to the final reveal on whether or not the damn thing took, it's a fun and racy ride.

Follow his progress in this day-by-day journal as he discusses and describes in full comedic (and graphic) detail such things as:

- The decision to empty the pistol chamber
- The vasectomy consultation, and why it sucks
- What a vasectomy is, wonderfully described using cars, factories and hair dryers
- Manscaping for beginners, and the perils of putting a sharp razor on bumpy bits and pieces
- The procedure itself, and why it sucks
- How frozen peas can replace a dog as man's best friend
- Some Not-Safe-for-Work reading on post-vasectomy "chores"

Punctuated with some amazing illustrations, "The Vasectomy Diaries" is a feast for the eyes, as well. It's a great read for any man who is thinking of the procedure, any man that has had the procedure or just anyone who wants to laugh at another man's pain.

Think of it as "What to Expect when You're Expecting a Procedure to make Women You Sleep with Stop Expecting."

Sit down, relax and a get ready to laugh as Rodney Lacroix tells a tale in a way only he can. Trust me, it's not your average diary.

You'll laugh your balls off.

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

Romantic as Hell - Tales of Woe, Tips of Woo: An Illustrated Guide for the Romantically Challenged Apr 27, 2016

by Rodney Lacroix, Noreen Conway, Ross Cavins

( 84 )

$2.99

FINALIST - 2016 IAN Book of the Year Awards

In this hilarious, heartfelt and surprisingly useful book, bestselling humor author Rodney Lacroix opens up about his failed romantic endeavors and - more importantly - how you can avoid the same hysterically bad (and sometimes wince-inducing/dry-heave generating) mistakes.

Let's face it. Everyone can use a little help in the dating and love departments. It just so happens that sometimes such help comes in the form of a hysterical book that has a cover showing a teddy bear riddled with arrows and the word "Hell" in the title.

Written in Rodney's trademarked comedic style, Romantic As Hell gives some great relationship advice like:

- Why shouldn't I give a feral cat as a token of my affection?
- Why you're not fooling anyone with that "free back massage any time" coupon.
- Which "romantic getaways" should you avoid, and which one may result in having your own shoes thrown at you?
- Why doesn't my man wear his Pinocchio thong?
- How can we keep the spark alive while parenting in a house with four children who are all busy annoying the crap out of us?

Each hilarious story is punctuated with amazing illustrations that transform the book into a highly entertaining feast for the eyes, as well.

Forming a relationship is hard. Keeping a relationship is harder. But adding romance into that relationship? Well, that can be a real bitch, can't it?

Whether you're trying to find a mate, already dating, trying to keep your marriage fresh or just looking for some new ideas to spice up your relationships, Romantic As Hell - Tales of Woe, Tips of Woo by award-winning humor author Rodney Lacroix has got your situation covered and is here to save the day.

Rodney Lacroix knows two things: comedy and romance. As "A Guide for the Romantically Challenged," he puts them together in a package that is sure to give the audience some unique concepts and perspectives on affection, and a whole lot of side-splitting laughter.

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

The Bigger Book of Parenting Tweets: Featuring More of the Most Hilarious Parents on Twitter (The Big Book of Tweets 2) Apr 12, 2015

by Jessica Ziegler, Norine Dworkin-McDaniel, Kate Hall, Kim Bongiorno, Bethany Thies, Andy Herald, Paige Kellerman, Rodney Lacroix

( 49 )

$4.99

Following the enormous success of their first book, The Big Book of Parenting Tweets, Science of Parenthood and Kate Hall are back with The BIGGER Book of Parenting Tweets, featuring EVEN MORE of the funniest parents on Twitter!

Venturing deep into the Twitterverse in search of even more hilarity, those intrepid editors discovered more than FIFTY of the funniest comedians who just happen to be parents. Together with still more of Science of Parenthood’s signature cartoons and special “behind the tweets” stories, Book Two is BIGGER … it’s BOLDER ... and gosh darn it, people LIKE it!

Praise for The Big Book of Parenting Tweets:
"The perfect book for parents who want -- NEED -- to laugh, but don't have time to sit down and read a daunting book. Grab it, head to the bathroom and lock the door until they find you!”
— Jill Smokler, author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy

"The Big Book of Parenting Tweets dishes up bite-size nuggets of funny. Impossible to read just one." — Jen Mann, author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges

“This book is HILARIOUS. Being a parent is a frustrating, hilarious, weird, wild experience. This book captures some of the best of our snark. You need it. You do.” — Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink and Swear

A terrific read, featuring some of the funniest (and most honest) parents in the Twitterverse... my go-to gift for new parents! — Johanna Stein, author of How Not To Calm A Child On A Plane and Other Parenting Advice from a Questionable Source

Here is just a peek at some of what you’ll find inside:

I don’t believe in spanking my children, but I do believe in flipping them off from the other room.
— Jewel Nunez (@OneFunnyMummy)

Me prying a toy hammer from my 4yo:
“Stop. It’s not hammer time!”
Parenting is lonely when nobody’s there to hear your outdated references.

— Full Metal Mommy (@FullMetalMommy)

The saddest thing I have ever seen is watching my son trying to carve a Playstation 3 out of a giant lump of coal on Christmas.

— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22)

All restaurants should have a $200 cover charge for babies.

— Rodney Lacroix (@Moooooog35)

No, honey. The deer is just sleeping. They tied him down so he wouldn’t fall off the top of their Ford Explorer.

— Linda Doty (@LindaInDisguise)

Other Formats: Paperback

This title and over 1 million more available with Kindle Unlimited.

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