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Secure Daughters, Confident Sons: How Parents Guide Their Children into Authentic Masculinity and Femininity Paperback – January 18, 2011

4.0 out of 5 stars 83 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

Praise for Secure Daughters, Confident Sons

"Excellent! Timeless wisdom is dispensed with clarity and refreshing lightness. If you are serious about raising great kids, you must read this book."
-Meg Meeker, MD, pediatrician and author of the best-selling Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters

"Secure Daughters, Confident Sons provides a powerful vision of raising girls and boys in an ever-changing world. Combining brain science with a Christian perspective, Glenn Stanton inspires parents and teachers to be at once visionary and practical. This book is inspiring and far reaching."
-Michael Gurian, author of The Wonder of Boys and The Wonder of Girls

"In this delightful book, Glenn Stanton lovingly reveals the secrets of raising healthy sons and daughters."
-Louann Brizendine, MD, author of The Female Brain and The Male Brain

"Secure Daughters, Confident Sons will help you become a secure, confident parent in raising gender-healthy children. It offers rich insight and highly practical applications for empowering your children to be all God intended when He made them male or female."
-Robert Lewis, founder of Men's Fraternity and author of Raising a Modern-Day Knight

"The culture tells us that the lines separating male and female are meaningless, but Glenn Stanton has tapped into the critical importance of recognizing and cultivating the distinct qualities of boys and girls. His book gives parents practical tools to help them appreciate and develop the femininity of their dauthers and the masculinity of their sons. Glenn's work demonstrates that each gender is uniquely gifted by God for a purpose, and by celebrating these gender-specific behaviors and attitudes, we strengthen families and help men and women find purpose and fulfillment."
-Jim Daly, president and CEO of Focus on the Famliy

"Every parent is raising a boy or girl into manhood or womanhood. There is no third option. Glenn Stanton has done parents and grandparents a noble service in helping us understand-based on insights of emerging science and the ancient wisdom of Christianity-how mothers and fathers both guide their children into healthy, balanced, and authentic masculinity and femininity. I know moms and dads-as well as those who want to understand how and why gender matters-will be helped by this important book."
-John Rosemond, family psychologist and author of The Well-Behaved Child: Discipline That Really Works!

"Glenn Stanton has courageously addressed one of the most challenging and rarely discussed aspects of parenting: what is the essence of your child's gender? His observations are not only insightful, but also practical. In a world steeped in gender confusion, this resource is invaluable."
-Dr. Juli Slattery, author and psychologist, Focus on the Family

"We live in a time of almost breathtaking confusion over things that should be basic, like the difference between boys and girls. Parents need good guidance in the midst of such confusion, and Glenn Stanton offers this kind of advice in Secure Daughters, Confident Sons. The secular world tells us that masculinity and femininity are merely social constructs that we must learn to leave behind, but Stanton believes that a proper understanding of manhood and womanhood is essential to Christian faithfulness and human happiness. I am thankful for his conviction and his courage."
-Dr. R. Albert Mohler Jr., president of the Southern Baptist Theology Seminary

About the Author

GLENN T. STANTON is the director for family formation studies at Focus on the Family. He debates and lectures extensively around the country on issues related to gender, sexuality, marriage, and parenting. Often sought out by national media to speak to these issues, Glenn is the author of several books and numerous articles. Glenn and his wife have five children.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Multnomah (January 18, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1601422946
  • ISBN-13: 978-1601422941
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.7 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (83 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #114,661 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
In the preface the author suggested the folly of trying to almost create an asexual humanity and even

how such attempt is hypocritical as such is not being practiced by those who preach. Thus in first two

chapters, Stanton describe the universal understanding of male and female qualities boys and girls possess,

and answered questions of doubts of apparent out of the norm behavioral symptoms. In chapters 3 and 4,

Stanton explored how parents can reinforce gender traits. In chapters 5 and 6 Stanton explored how parents

might bring out gender-distinct qualities, walking with them as they turn into men and women, what parents

might do to get them there. In chapters 7–13, Stanton examined the expression of gender-specific attributes in

parents might contribute necessary processes for the healthy development of children’s security, compassion,

confidence, intellect, and maturity. Finally, in chapter 14 the author suggested that gender differences affect

marriages and how such effect can be used to make a difference in raising healthy children.

Universal attributes of gender

Dealing with this in the first two chapters Stanton spoke about male and female universal traits which

characterized them. Concerning male, he suggested traits such a goal driven, strategist, opportunists, chance

takers, initiators, aggressive, competitive and dominant. In bringing out the best in one’s son, the author

suggested threefold approach of modelling, molding and mindful of God’s unique will for their son.
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Format: Paperback
Glenn T. Stanton unapologetically believes that males and females are different, and that the difference isn't just a result of social conditioning. Little boys are different from little girls just like their daddies are different from their mothers. Their interests are different, their needs are different, even their brains are different. Stanton's book itself is evidence. If we were to remove his name along with all of the references to his being male, there wouldn't be a doubt that a man wrote the book. What lady would write a section on the benefits of throwing and catching babies, after all?

Stanton makes it clear that "different doesn't mean inferior":

"Different means different--think unique if that helps--and many of these female and male differences show us how important, vital, and necessary both male and female are for society and the family. Each has essential qualities, strengths as well as weaknesses, that the other doesn't have."

And to back that up, he gives equal space in his book to raising boys and raising girls; they even get their own chapters. Why wouldn't they? The goal of raising little boys is to make good men, he says, and the goal of raising little girls is to make good women. While "goodness" is the same regardless of gender, what makes a good man is quite different from what makes a good woman, and so there are aspects of their upbringing that should be different. "Raising secure daughters and confident sons is, by definition, gender distinct work."

Stanton also makes a big fuss about the difference in parenting styles between mother and dad, and he says that both are important. Kids benefit from the balance.
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Format: Paperback
Secure Daughters/Confident Sons: How parents guide their children into authentic masculinity and feminity by Glenn T. Stanton

This book is actually a wonderful guide to the inner workings of men and women. I was initially put off in finding out that Mr. Stanton is part of the Focus on the Family team, but those fears were immediately laid aside.

The book delves into the minds of men and women and the contribution each gender/sex brings to the table in raising children. The book is filled with research, both from others and his own work with families and children, and with real life stories from his own upbringing and his experience with his four daughters and one son as well as from his practice.

Mr. Stanton clearly defines the differences between the sexes and decries the use of the word 'gender' as something different or less than our physical differences. Men and women were created differently in order to fulfill different roles in life, in marriage, and most importantly in the raising of children. Whole children need to be raised in families (or extended families) where they receive the benefit of both a mother and a father. Neither one is more important or less important than the other, both sides of the coin so to speak are needed in order to produce whole human beings.

The book initially breaks down boys in one chapter and girls in the next, balancing what fathers bring to the table with what mothers bring to the table. Later chapters of the book bring together both sides to more clearly show that the differences are more than superficial but less controversial than they sound. Each chapter ends with a question(s) relating to the information presented and a real life response.

Anyone who has children in their lives would find this book helpful. Anyone contemplating having children should read this book.

disclaimer: "I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review"
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