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Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself Paperback – June 23, 2015
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“A portable friend to all readers―especially but not only women―who need to learn that the Golden Rule works only if it’s reversible: We must learn to treat ourselves as well as we wish to treat others.” (Gloria Steinem)
“A beautiful book that helps us all see the way to cure the world, one person at a time, starting with yourself. Read it and start the journey.” (Rosie O’Donnell, talk show host)
“An original and doable blueprint for improving the quality of your life.” (Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, author of Flow and Creativity)
“Neff’s powerful research and her ability to explain how self-compassion affects our everyday lives makes this book a transformative read.” (Brené Brown, Ph.D., author of The Gifts of Imperfection)
“This is an important book. Following its advice can free readers from the chains of self-criticism and replace them with the wings of self-encouragement.” (Steven Stosny, Ph.D., author of Love Without Hurt)
“In this deeply personal, highly practical book, Kristin Neff moves the entire study of compassion forward.” (Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Happiness)
“Drawing on a powerful blend of Western psychology and Eastern meditative strategies, Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation.” (Tara Brach, Ph.D., author of Radical Acceptance)
“This book and its courageous and compassionate author will become essential reading for all of us seeking inner peace and true, lasting happiness in our lives. Savor and enjoy!” (Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., author of Mindsight)
“Brilliant! Self-compassion is a revolutionary new idea-a better idea-pioneered by the author, Kristin Neff, with profound implications for how to live our lives.” (Christopher K. Germer, Ph.D., author of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion)
From the Inside Flap
The relentless pursuit of high self-esteem has become a virtual religion. Our ultracompetitive culture tells us we need to be constantly above average to feel good about ourselves, but there is always someone more attractive, successful, or intelligent than we are. And even when we do manage to grab hold of high self-esteem for a brief moment, we can't seem to keep it. Our sense of self-worth goes up and down like a Ping-Pong ball, rising and falling in lockstep with our latest success or failure.
Fortunately, there is an alternative to self-esteem that many experts believe is a better and more effective path to happiness: self-compassion. The research of Dr. Kristin Neff and other leading psychologists indicates that people who are compassionate toward their failings and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who repeatedly judge themselves. This book powerfully demonstrates why it's so important to be self-compassionate and give yourself the same caring support you'd give to a good friend.
Using solid empirical research, personal stories, practical exercises, and humor, Dr. Neff--the world's foremost expert on self-compassion--explains how to heal destructive emotional patterns so that you can be healthier, happier, and more effective.--Brené Brown, Ph.D., author of The Gifts of Imperfection
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I am Bipolar with Histrionic tendencies and have struggled all my life with my self-image and an eating disorder. Guilt has always been my default emotion. Shame. All the things that one stuffs down with food. Or alcohol. Or shopping. Or any reckless, impulsive behavior meant to stuff feelings down so we DON'T FEEL them. And when I don't feel my feelings, I PUNISH myself. This has been going on all my life.
This book is changing my entire outlook, without confusing me or SCARING me to death. This is because it is so straightforward and common sense. I feel Empowered. And almost Brave.
This does not read as a medical/scientific text and I tend to be highly skeptical about these sorts of books. However, with this book I find few, if any, intellectual objections to the manner in which it is written or in how the studies and source material are not cited until the "notes" at the end. (This seems to be increasingly common and I often find it hard to stick with a book when the author is not forthcoming with sources within the text itself.)
But in this case, I am not bothered the lack of in-text acknowledgement of source material because there's really not anything to OBJECT TO or call into question within the text. All of the advice is sound. I've not read anything (so far) that is harmful or suspect.
The exercises are so simple and the advice will set your brain to sparking, esp. if you have a spiritual bent as do I.
I am eager to work my way through the rest of the book and am pacing myself so that I don't do too much at once. I will check back in when I am finished.
Buy this book and see if it helps you as much as it is helping me.
It made such a difference on me that I gave a talk to 85 young adults on the subject to help them see what I saw from this book. Thanks Kristen.
Hook em! (UT 07)
Top international reviews
This book covers these subjects and it has reinforced my beliefs
Reassuring that you don't need to be perfect but just be.