Industrial Deals Beauty Save up to 90% on textbooks Womens Red and Rose nav_sap_plcc_ascpsc New year, new music. Amazon music Unlimited. Learn more. All-New Fire 7, starting at $49.99 Starting at $39.99 Grocery Handmade 2018 Planners Home and Garden Book a house cleaner for 2 or more hours on Amazon TheGrandTour TheGrandTour TheGrandTour  Three new members of the Echo family Fire 7, starting at $49.99 Kindle Paperwhite AutoRip in CDs & Vinyl Shop now



on February 13, 2017
Dr. Gottman's principles are simple but they aren't easy. Some of the exercises are fun, others, not so much.
0Comment| One person found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on January 17, 2018
My wife and I were told to get it and read it before attending marriage counseling. I have talked to other couples who attended counseling at different places and they all were told to read this book.
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on April 15, 2014
there is so much practical advise in this book.

most relationship books are based on a lot of theory of principles, but this books actually approaches relationship from a more science observation perspective. there are more statistics and numbers presented in this book than others.

this is a great book for couples and something i strongly recommend to all my married friends.
0Comment| One person found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on April 4, 2015
EXCELLENT book and I recommend couples to read it BEFORE they get married or shortly thereafter BEFORE problems and emotional baggage build up and can't be repaired. Great for any stage of a relationship however, and also helpful for ANY relationship-not just marriage. A lot of basic relationship advice, communication and expectations discussed that would be helpful for co-workers, neighbors or relatives ect.
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on November 13, 2014
Using this more for premarital counseling, so some of the questions and examples don't quite fit yet, as we haven't been arguing ourselves into trenches for years.

It does often seem both pessimistic and optimistic, saying that there are certain subtle signifiers that show a marriage is doomed, but then there are rather extreme examples (a couple where the wife wants children and the husband doesn't) that is then followed by a statement that acknowledging that these problems will never be solved will save the marriage. Perhaps it will save the marriage from ending in explosions in flames and instead end a bit more civilly? I'm not sure, just an observation from the unexperienced.

I would like a non-religious book that means to work specifically with couples thinking about marriage, ideally from Gottman!
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on July 6, 2015
Recommended by my therapist and it applies beautifully to any relationship. There are fun quizzes that help you get to know your partner as well as great examples of the principles described in the book. Real life relationship scenarios help bring home the information and illustrate the author's point. The introduction itself was a huge help for me, dispelling many commonly held beliefs about what makes a good relationship. Biggest message from the extremely study-based information is that no two relationships are just alike, and that what makes people happy with each other is much more individualized than "recipes" like enjoying the same hobbies or even practicing active listening.
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on March 28, 2014
I'm not much for psychobabble and tend to look at books like this, as just that. However, I was way off on this one. If you and your partner actually "like each other" but find yourself struggling and are wanting to reconnect, this book may be very helpful. The truth actually does hurt but, if you can listen to it and admit it, the author makes it clear that you may need to cut your losses and save each other more grief and disappointment. Some things just can't be fixed. There is nothing too heavy or complicated in this book to keep you from understanding each other better and having a great, long life together, if you're willing. I actually got a lot of good information and insight out of this book.....go figure.
0Comment| One person found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on December 10, 2014
As a counselor with a specialty in marriage and family therapy, I rank this book quite high on my suggestions of MUST READs. I've worked with many couples and found this book to be quite helpful for clients as well as conducting therapy. I've found that couples can understand better when they are able to put a label on behavior rather than just having a gut feeling. For example, the four horsemen (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) gives people labels or definitions for behaviors that can occur during ineffective communication. Now partners can label what was offensive rather than "it was the way you said it!" Its also great because it gives readers assignments or therapists can tap into it for ideas for homework assignments. Excellent book. :)
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on December 4, 2014
Lots of homework and at one point they had you write practically a novel to each other which my husband did not do (he's not really much for writing). I get that the point is to work on things together but a little more realistic portions of work would be better.
0Comment| One person found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on June 5, 2015
This is the best relationship books I've ever encountered. It helped me see how my relationship was getting into a really negative pattern. The concept of the four horsemen was extremely helpful as I realized I was exhibiting some nasty behaviors that needed to stop. I also learned about how important it is to have "repair attempts" in an argument to deescalate the argument. The book also has chapters on building a sense of love/affect/admiration for your partner. This book can save your relationship.

The author has a pretty high opinion of himself - he has great ideas but he didn't solve the Israeli/Palestine conflict.
0Comment|Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse