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Sex After . . .: Women Share How Intimacy Changes as Life Changes Hardcover – February 6, 2014
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"[Krasnow] is a knowledgeable guide who shows great respect to the variety of life circumstances and aims to put readers at ease...there is osmething relatable for everyone and many opportunities to gain new knowledge as one moves through life."
"A nuanced, revelatory account of the role of sexual freedom in modern intimacy"
"We think that sex is eternal but in fact our ideas on sex do change with the decades. Sex After… is full of comforting information about these changes. A book that will be read and reread with gratitude."
—Erica Jong, New York Times bestselling author of Fear of Flying
“This book will start conversations that need to be had, and discussions about female sexual health and pleasure that need to be better understood. Some of the best and most practical advice comes from those who have been there. I also know change to, and in, our sex lives is inevitable and that women want to know what other women really do to recreate their intimate and sexual landscape. Part validation, part guide, part supportive girlfriend, Sex After... is your close girlfriends in book form sharing the real goods—and I mean real goods—on what they did and do.”
—Lou Paget, author of The Great Lover Playbook and AASECT Certified Sex Educator
Praise for The Secret Lives of Wives
"One of Ten Titles to Pick Up Now. ‘Boyfriends with boundaries,’ separate summers, and other therapeutic strategies for maintaining wedded bliss over the long haul."
— O, the Oprah Magazine
"At first this book terrified me: another submission and sacrifice marriage manual for wives? Instead Iris Krasnow delivers astonishing candor, realistic compassion, and invaluable wisdom when it comes to how paradoxically infuriating and rewarding long-term marriages can be. The best book on marriage ever."
— Leslie Morgan Steiner
"In this breathtaking book, The Secret Lives of Wives, Iris Krasnow opens a window into the inner world of women whose unique courage and vision has enabled them to find relationship happiness over the long term. With wit and wisdom, she thoughtfully tells their stories and then fills the reader with brilliant ideas and concepts to apply to their own lives. This is as much of a men’s book as it was written by and for women."
— Dr. Bill Cloke
"Iris Krasnow has managed to demystify the workings of long-term marriages by confirming the mysterious uniqueness of each one. The secret, she finds, lies in the way two people negotiate their own personal amalgam of companionship and sex, compromise and disappointment, lust and tenderness, trust and lies. The challenge for the rest of us is to do the same."
— Suzanne Braun Levine
"She whips up a spirited, enlightening cocktail of comfort, support and grace. Fulfilling and well-structured."
— Kirkus Reviews
About the Author
Top Customer Reviews
However, my initial interest was sparked by the chapters titled "Sex After His Illness" (my husband's chemotherapy) and "Sex After Menopause" (my own hormonal rollercoaster). I felt I at least owed it to the book and its author to read those chapters.
In "Sex After His Illness," both stories were from newlyweds dealing with pregnancy and babies. You cannot, of course, address every circumstance, but why have two people in similar positions as the only examples, especially when the previous chapter was "Sex After Baby"? I felt for Richaela, the young wife of a Marine who lost his leg during a deployment. And, I liked that the story was told in her voice. However, she needed some guidance to put it in a coherent order. It would have been beneficial for Krasnow to ask questions for clarification. I don't expect the women who tell these stories to be writers, but I expected it of Krasnow. Most unsettling about Richaela's account was how severe her husband's PTSD was—yet there is no mention of counseling. Instead, Krasnow uses the missing limb to launch into research on the regeneration of genitals.
When Krasnow introduces Julia, she gets it wrong from the start, saying Julia's husband got sick right after their first child was born.Read more ›
I was expecting great things from this book, but they were not delivered.
The beginning was lots of stories about 20-somethings and how sexual their lives are, how they 'hook up' and text to get sex.
The later chapters were divided into reasons why sex may be more difficult or absent. But there were no real suggestions on how to improve my sex life should any of those things occur, just a series of stories by women who had experienced those things and how it affected them, and how the issues resolved. For example, the young wounded warrior wife whose husband gradually got better healthwise and then the sex improved because he had more strength and stamina. The chapter on 'his parts' gave a detailed explanation of how male sex drive can be affected by both physical issues and emotional/mental ones. But no real help was offered.
I feel like the author was focusing less on sex than on emotional/romantic connections and how important THOSE are and how penetrative orgasmic sex doesn't really matter if you have that. Also there was no comment at all on older women who want to have sex outside of a committed partnered relationship. With some women choosing to remain single and sexually active, that segment of the population was ignored.
All in all, I was not impressed with this book and the way sex was addressed with women who are experiencing difficulties of any kind.
The tone in chapter after chapter felt almost like a cheerleading chant reiterating that women can continue having a fulfilling sex life at each stage of their life. Quite a bit of the anecdotal advice was repetitive. Finally I felt slightly uncomfortable that the author often chose to emphasise the attractive physical appearance of those women who had success stories to share, in many instances inclusive of materialistic attributes, as well, such as the fact that they arrived for their interview wearing designer shoes.
I don't enjoy writing a negative review, but I didn't find this book particularly informative and would not recommend it.
I received this book as a Library Thing Early Reviewer, but that did not influence my review.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I bought this for my wife who loved it, shared it, and it's still being passed around to all her friends. I enjoyed the feedback.Published 4 months ago by jim
Excellent, up-to-date book about the realities of robust and healthy sexual life beyond "after…. Read morePublished 21 months ago by naomi s. korn, lcsw, inc
Issue after issue is addressed in this book concerning sex under a variety of circumstances that are common, such as aging, surgery, etc. Read morePublished on June 28, 2014 by Winterpast Rev
Very good inlighing. I felt the book keep my interest .the writer did a great job with her research. Will read it again.Published on June 15, 2014 by ruth seney
No complaints from me. It's just a well written, well researched, well thought out book on the importance of intimacy and how unforeseen life occurrences can (if couples allow it)... Read morePublished on May 28, 2014 by Shenequa
I ordered this book with interest. Unfortunately it was missing several pages. I returned it and received a new copy. This copy again had the same missing pages. Read morePublished on May 10, 2014 by Brian A Thomson