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The Shark-Infested Custard Paperback – December 6, 2005

by Charles Willeford (Author)

11 customer reviews

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From the master of Miami noir comes this tale of four regular guys living in a singles apartment building who experience firsthand that there's more than one type of heat in Miami.

Larry Dolman is a rather literal minded ex-cop who now works private security. Eddie Miller is an airline pilot who's studying to get his real estate license. Don Luchessi is a silver salesman who's separated from his wife but too Catholic to get a divorce. Hank Norton is a drug company rep who gets four times as many dames as any of the other guys. They are all regular guys who like to drink, play cards, meet broads, and shoot a little pool. But when a friendly bet goes horribly awry, they find themselves with two dead bodies on their hands and a homicidal husband in the wings—and acting more like hardened criminals than upstanding citizens.

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Editorial Reviews

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"Nobody writes like Charles Willeford. . . . He is an original—funny, weird and wonderful." —James Crumley

"If you are looking for a master's insight into the humid decadence of South Florida . . . nobody does that as well as Mr. Willeford." —The New York Times Book Review

"Willeford has a marvelously deadpan way with losers on both sides of the law." —The Philadelphia Inquirer

About the Author

Charles Willeford was a highly decorated (Silver Star, Bronze Star, Purple Heart, Luxembourg Croix de Guerre) tank commander with the Third Army in World War II. He was also a professional horse trainer, boxer, radio announcer, and painter. Willeford, the author of twenty novels, created the Miami detective series featuring Hoke Moseley, which includes Miami Blues, Sideswipe, The Way We Die Now, and New Hope for the Dead. He died in 1988.

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Product details

Paperback: 272 pages
Publisher: Vintage Crime/Black Lizard (December 6, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 9781400032518
ISBN-13: 978-1400032518
ASIN: 1400032512
Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8 inches
Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 11 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #797,085 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #2280 in Books > Humor & Entertainment > Humor > Lawyers & Criminals
- #4608 in Books > Mystery, Thriller & Suspense > Mystery > Hard-Boiled
- #8680 in Books > Literature & Fiction > Short Stories & Anthologies > Anthologies

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Classic Willeford

July 20, 2017

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

Fabulous Willeford story. Low key. Noir. Realistic but odd. Classic Willeford.

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Baron Von Cool

Oddly-structured thriller, one of Willeford's weakest

October 29, 2011

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

The Shark-Infested Custard is a mediocre and oddly-structured thriller (although the middle of the book feels more like filler). I bought into the "Tarantino" hype surrounding the novel and wished I hadn't. It was an okay read because I like the author, but I would never suggest anyone new to Charles Willeford begin here (see my list of recommended titles below). The book got off to a good start, but I didn't like how it jumped around in time, switching character POV as it went (and normally I like multiple POV books). Willeford didn't even give proper, full-length POV chapters to a couple of the characters, so I felt short-changed. Parts of it were kind of boring and I have to admit, I struggled to finish it. There were too many "who cares?" subplots that took the book off on weird tangents. The whole thing felt like a few random "slice of life" short stories the author pasted together by making the characters all know each other rather than working as a unified whole. The weird ending reminded me of a sitcom coming full circle, just in time to hit the "reset" button for next week's episode (well, almost!). Did I mention the book's stupid title that has nothing to do with anything in the story? I bought it used and it had some good parts, but was ultimately nothing special.

I've read a lot of Willeford's books. He is a great author with a wonderfully likable style. Unfortunately, this is one of his weakest books, right up there with his last Hoke Mosely novel. You want good Willeford? Try reading his best: The Woman Chaser,Miami Blues,Sideswipe: A Hoke Moseley Detective Thriller, and The Black Mass of Brother Springer.

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Julie Griffin

Doesn't Deliver

August 1, 2015

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

A story about four self-absorbed, completely unlikable guys. Lots of descriptive filler as if the writer was just working to hit his word count. It was a decent set-up, but the story never delivered on what the back cover blurb promised. I'll stick with James Ellroy when I need my noir fix.

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RestlessAssKickingSyndrome

Sort of like Seinfeld with violence!

June 24, 2014

Format: Kindle EditionVerified Purchase

I think my title sums it up pretty good. Four bachelors living the Miami singles scene get involved in awkward situations that need creative solutions. The dialogue is masterful.

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JM Alexandria

Late, weaker entry from a pulp master

April 25, 2010

Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase

Not a unified novel, but interrelated stories. Willeford, like the latter filmmaker Tarrantino, revels in pushing the limit to often comedic effect. Dated details detract a little bit from the story... which weren't intended one thinks thirty some years ago.
Excellent reseller.

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Maori

Garbage

December 19, 2014

Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase

This crap wasn't even realistic in the '70s.

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Dave Wilde

A Slightly Twisted World Of Swinging Seventies Miami

May 9, 2015

Format: Mass Market Paperback

Willeford has long been considered the master of the Miami noir tale. He has a knack for creating some rather twisted characters with human foibles. The "Shark-Infested Custard" is a dip into the swinging singles scene of Miami in the early 1970's. The scene, at least to start, is a giant singles apartment complex - no families allowed. "They won't let two men share an apartment." But, the "rules are relaxed for women, and two women are allowed to share one apartment."

It's the perfect place for men on the prowl and there are so many stewardesses and nurses bunked up there that a guy can't help but score. This story is told from various points of view among four young men who have made their home in this complex- Larry Dolman the ex-cop, Hank Norton the pharmaceutical sales rep, Eddie Miller the pilot, and Don Luchessi, who sells silverware for an old British firm. They work as little as possible, spend hours at the pool, and on martinis. But, this is a Willeford novel, so there is a dark underside that pops up. It pops up when the men make a bet about whether Hank can pick up a broad at the toughest place in Miami- a drive-in theater since what woman would go there except on a date, and he comes out with a drug overdosing fourteen-year-old. And there are other hints that the dating scene might not be what the television shows make it out to be: when one of them finds a woman through a dating service and another walks out of a party with her, what could possibly happen except six frustrating weeks of dating and never getting very far and all of a sudden the irate husband shows up and starts shooting. Meanwhile, Don is locked into a marriage with a woman he can't stand and eventually he tries running off with his daughter and hiding out from the wife.

This isn't anything like the noir novels that made Willeford a cult favorite or the Hoke Mosley crime stories that made him famous towards the latter part of his career. But, there is something a little bit twisted and different about life in a Willeford novel and this isn't just a story about young men on the prowl or coming of age. The writing is smooth and professional and Willeford ropes the reader in pretty deeply before letting out hints that all might not be what it seems on the surface. Being young and single and successful might be something, but you also gotta know how to dispose of bodies, how to deal with sharpshooting irate husbands, and when to leave town.

So are the young men featured in the story the "sharks" swimming around in the custard? Or is their illusion of what life is the sweet sugary custard and the reality that they experience is a pool filled with sharks at every turn? It is easy to find them amoral hedonists, but they really don't go looking for trouble. It just sort of finds them. They are not really that much more predatory or cruel than most other people or are they?

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