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Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage Paperback – Unabridged, September 1, 2003
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About the Author
- Item Weight : 10.4 ounces
- Paperback : 256 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0842360247
- ISBN-13 : 978-0842360241
- Product Dimensions : 5.4 x 0.8 x 8.2 inches
- Publisher : Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.; Unabridged edition (September 1, 2003)
- Language: : English
- Best Sellers Rank: #10,229 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer Reviews:
Top reviews from the United States
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He really could have used a female coauthor. In the section on how the wife benefits from sex, all the reasons are actually how it will make her husband happier. Which is great and all, but he misses the fact that a woman will ALSO be in a better mood, sleep better, feel more loving, etc. If she is having good sex. In the same vein, he gives lots of attention to how hard sexual rejection is for men, but never mentions that rejection is also extremely hard on women. There are many marriages where the woman has the higher libido and this is given scant attention. If this is your situation, you may not find much to help you here.
It also oversimplifies some things. You could easily read this book and think that if you give your husband great sex, he will turn into a perfect man. While it certainly doesn’t hurt, you will still have problems that need work. That’s just life, and hear me on this: if your husband is sinning, sexually or otherwise, it is NOT your fault! While you can help, his choices are ultimately his responsibility and you should never be motivated to have sex because you are afraid he will stray or be grumpy if you don’t.
On the other hand, it tells husbands that if they are helpful around the house, loving, and kind, then their wives will be sexually responsive. Again, it certainly helps, but sometimes there are way deeper issues going on and no amount of dishwashing and foot rubs is going to change it. In those cases some counseling is probably in order.
Finally, if you aren’t yet married and are reading this book, you may get the impression that the husband will always want sex more than the wife. Please don’t set yourself up for that to become a self-fulfilling prophecy. As a counselor I think he has that bias because he sees marriages in trouble. But I think if you go into marriage with realistic expectations (and your husband heeds the advice here!) you just may enjoy and desire sex every bit as much as your man does.
For women that need more help than this book provides, I highly recommend Sheila Gregoire’s blog or her books.
If you're a dude and are close to marriage or within your first few years, you NEED this book. If I would have read this book 5 years ago, I wouldn't have wasted so much time making my wife sad and quite frankly loving her incorrectly. This book gives practical advice on how to live out Song of Songs and Ephesians 5. Let go of your pride, let go of your way, and buy this NOW!
It brought up great topics for conversation that we just didn't think of and was a fun thing to do during "intermissions." ;)
Definitely would recommend for any couple! Can be a little cheesy with mock conversations and nicknames, but those make for funny banter with your spouse later. :)
Top reviews from other countries
Sheet Music is a fantastic book, with 9 days to go until I get married, this has refocused me on what true God honouring sex is and how my attitude towards my bride to be should be now, on the night of our wedding and there after.
We need to have sacrificial love in our hearts that flows from us so that we put our spouse first and ourselves last, only then will be truly happy and living in God's best for our lives and the lives of those around us. This works in all areas of life, but also in the bedroom. We need to love them, honour them, treat them and put our all into helping them enjoy each and every sexual encounter we have, then they will reciprocate that to us and both we will be fulfilled in our sex lives, but more importantly in our lives as a whole.
This is a great book, I read it in 24 hours and just couldn't put it down! Give it a read!
For your information: I asked top leaders from some of the best Churches across Europe and North America for their opinion on what is the top marriage book. After going through their answers the top ones mentioned time and time again are:
1, Love & Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
2, Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married by Gary Chapman
3, The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman
4, His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage by Willard F. Harley
5, Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? by Gary L. Thomas
6, Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage by Kevin Leman (with this one I have been advised to only read it a couple of weeks before I get married!)
A good read for what is often not discussed at the pulpit (for obvious reasons, it’s not everything you can discuss in front of those who are not married.)