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Dina Matos McGreevey

Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage Hardcover – May 1, 2007

by DINA Matos McGREEVEY (Author)

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The truth behind the lies.

It was an unforgettable scene. Dina Matos McGreevey, an attractive woman in her mid-thirties, wife, mother, and First Lady of the state of New Jersey, watched silently as her husband, then New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevey, resigned his office with the revelation that he was a "gay American." The picture of grace and loyalty, perfectly composed in her pale blue suit, Dina Matos McGreevey gave no sign of the tangled mixture of fear, sorrow, and anger she felt that day, no hint of the devastation that was to come. Since then she has been asked repeatedly about the nature of her marriage, about what she knew and when she knew it. Since then, she has remained silent. Until now.

Speaking up at last, Dina Matos McGreevey here recounts the details of her marriage to Jim McGreevey. What emerges is a tale of love and betrayal, of heartbreak and scandal . . . and ultimately, hope.

It all began with so much promise. Dina Matos was a responsible and civic-minded young woman who fell in love with the passion of political action. When Jim McGreevey walked into her life, he appeared to be a kind and loving man, someone with whom she could build a life based on shared ideals, a strong spiritual commitment, and a desire to make a difference in the world. Beyond their initial chemistry, Dina Matos was attracted by Jim McGreevey's principles and his unwavering devotion to his work. She didnt know that his life, and thus their marriage, were built on a foundation of lies; that his past was littered with casual sexual encounters in seedy bookstores and public parks; or that, by his own admission, he began an adulterous affair with another man while she was in the hospital awaiting the birth of their child. "Could I have known," she asks "How could I have known"

With scalding honesty, she tells of her life with the former governor, of the politics and public service that brought them together, and the lies that tore them apart.

Here is a story of a marriage that was anything but happily-ever-after, told by a strong and resilient woman who can, and finally will, speak for herself.

Print length

304 pages
Language

English
Publisher

Hyperion
Publication date

May 1, 2007
Grade level

8 and up
Dimensions

6.13 x 9.25 inches
ISBN-10

1401303641
ISBN-13

978-1401303648
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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dina Matos McGreevey is executive director of the Columbus Foundation at Columbus Hospital in Newark, New Jersey. She lives in New Jersey with her five-year-old daughter, Jacqueline.

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Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Hyperion; First Edition (May 1, 2007)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 304 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1401303641
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1401303648
Grade level ‏ : ‎ 8 and up
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.2 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6.13 x 9.25 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #1,788,116 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #10,112 in Political Leader Biographies
- #21,161 in Women's Biographies
- #60,434 in Memoirs (Books)

Customer Reviews:
59 ratings

Customer reviews

5 star		68%
4 star		12%
3 star		10%
2 star		6%
1 star		4%

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Myrna G.

A beautifully written life tragedy. This is a kindle book.

Reviewed in the United States on April 13, 2014

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The memoir of Dina McGreevey was very well written. She came across as a very polished and together young woman. I had no difficulty in believing that Dina was not "in the know" about her husband's life style. I think she was simply an innocent and believed the best about her husband Jim, from beginning to almost the end. Her shock in finding out what kind man she had married will most likely affect her view of humanity the rest of her life. I believe she wrote this book in all honesty and that she was simply an "innocent" who was stung by a selfish and unkind man. In the end of her book an alarm went off in my head when she wrote that Jim had invited "Jackie" to spend time with him and yet he had his man friend there the whole time, In my view, Jim McGreevy and his men friends should not be allowed to entertain this little innocent child when he has "company". Their behavior together as lovers just might not be appropriate for the eyes of a baby girl. A visit with Daddy is great but not when he has a boyfriend-lover about.

I am tempted to read Jim McGreevey's book. It gives a picture of his difficulty in acceptance as a young man who was gay. It's too bad that he did not resolve his gayness before he married the first time and especially when he married Dina on his second try. I am glad that she and Jim gave life to a wonderful little girl who will one day have her say in all of this mess. I just hope that Dina will marry a kind man who will give her all she deserves and not the selfishness that Jim McGreevey put on Dina. What a stingy human soul Jim McGreevey poured over such a sweet and hard working beautiful lady. She showed the understanding of a saint on so many occasions.

3 people found this helpful

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Donna Hill

Personal Recollections of a Marriage Gone Wrong

Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2014

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I enjoyed this memoir. It was perfect for me because I love it when writers of memoirs tell us in detail what was happening in their homes, with their families, and in their thoughts and feelings. I read Jim Mcgreevey's book and I enjoyed it but I wished that he would have cut out at least a third of it. Way too much political talk for me to digest! Dina could have written more about her career at the hospital or her activities as first lady, but she knew that most of her readers would want to know about the impact of her husband's political and personal crisis on her and on her daughter. I loved all the personal details. The last half of the book reads almost like a journal-- the cell phone conversations, arguments, anxiety attacks--it's all there.

When I reviewed her husband's book, I wrote that after I was finished that I couldn't help liking him. Now I feel the same way about Dina. She comes across simply as a woman who fell in love with a person who couldn't return her love. He was playing a part. I believe that it's easy to miss things in a political marriage because people by the very nature of their roles can become distant from one another. This has happened with many of our presidents. To be honest, I have to admit that I am curious about if and when the Mcgreeveys ever stopped having a sexual relationship. They shared a bed right up until the very last day, but neither of them write about if and when the sexual part of their marriage disappeared.

Other than that one question I would love to ask, Dina answered most of my other questions. Once again, I was reminded of how stressful it is for famous people when the media circus descends upon them. I remember that supposedly Jackie Kennedy married Onassis just to get away from that constant pressure--actually fearing for her children's lives. I have great empathy for people when they are suffering emotionally and have this terrible added pressure.

Reviewed in the United States on May 19, 2012

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I related to this because I had a gay husband, but not one who was in the "limelight" as her husband was. What incredible emotional trials she experienced. I cheered for her all the way through, and still do. Unlike some of the other reviewers, I thought the memoir was very well written and very self-reflective. She did a great job maneuvering through people, places, and events of her brief marriage, not an easy task considering she was not only a wife but a governor's wife as well! I could not put this book down. I stayed up very late and then finished it early in the morning. It was well worth the loss of sleep! The book was published in 2007. Now I want to know how she and her lovely daughter are doing today!

3 people found this helpful

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Bonnie Chung TP

A must read!

Reviewed in the United States on March 31, 2018

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Great descriptive narrative of what went on behind closed doors. A violent, but candid look at the experience lived. Brave, abused partner tells it a all.

2 people found this helpful

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JayefromJersey

Good Read

Reviewed in the United States on October 6, 2013

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This is a very good memoir by McGreevey's second wife..many, many accounts will make you angry that she was treated like this by someone that calls himself a Christian. In addition it helps to understand and accept that people are who they are and no amount of secrets will conceal that. Eventually it all will come out one day. And in this case as has happen in other families, other people are hurt as a result.

One person found this helpful

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Joan Rosenberg

, McGreavy was horrible but typical of gay men who marry women to stay in the closet.

Reviewed in the United States on March 23, 2019

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I like to read memoirs of other straight spouses who were blindsided like Dina was when she discovered her husband was gay.

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Bud/Bits

This woman deserves a medal

Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2014

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What a story. Strong woman. She really handled this with grace. I wish her the best. I would recommend this to any of my friends.

One person found this helpful

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Nancy

Silent Partner

Reviewed in the United States on September 20, 2007

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I bought the book because I was interested to hear Dina's story. How could she be totally blindsided by Jim McGreevy's coming out? The book never really cleared that up for me. No real new relevations. However, it was an interesting look inside politics. A very quick read.

5 people found this helpful

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Minah

Not a growth story...

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 30, 2013

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Dina spends her time feeling sorry for herself and trying to convince everybody of the fact that she could not know about her husband's homosexuality. While it is understandable that she didn't suspect anything during their brief marriage, it seems to me that she is still in denial and wanting everybody to be angry with her...I preferred her husbands version of the story - The Confession by James McGreevey.

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Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage Hardcover – May 1, 2007

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