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The Sociopath Next Door Paperback – March 14, 2006

4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 5,178 ratings

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Who is the devil you know?

Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?

In the pages of
The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.

We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in
The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.

How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.

The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading
The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.

It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and
The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.

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From the Publisher

The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout, Abnormal Psychology, Personality Disorders, Psychopathy books

The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout, Abnormal Psychology, Personality Disorders, Psychopathy books

The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout, Abnormal Psychology, Personality Disorders, Psychopathy books

The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout, Abnormal Psychology, Personality Disorders, Psychopathy books

Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

Who is the devil "you know?
Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?
In the pages of "The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He's a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.
We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in "The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people--one in twenty-five--has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt."
How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They're more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others' suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.
The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading "TheSociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know--someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for--is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.
It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and "The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.

About the Author

Martha Stout, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in private practice, served on the faculty in psychology in the department of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School for twenty-five years. She is also the author of The Myth of Sanity. She lives on Cape Ann in Massachusetts.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 0767915828
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Harmony; 1st edition (March 14, 2006)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 256 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9780767915823
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0767915823
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 7.2 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.16 x 0.55 x 7.96 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 5,178 ratings

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Martha Stout
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Martha Stout, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in private practice, served on the faculty in psychology in the department of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School for twenty-five years. She is also the author of "The Myth of Sanity" and "The Paranoia Switch." She lives on Cape Ann in Massachusetts.

Customer reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
5,178 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book enlightening and comprehensive on the subject. They describe it as an entertaining read with clear writing and a rhythmic tone. The stories are engaging and depict the compelling nature of the subject. Many readers consider the book worth the price. However, opinions differ on the sociopathic mindset and the phenomenon of conscience.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

713 customers mention "Insight"651 positive62 negative

Customers find the book helpful and enlightening. They say it provides a good foundation for understanding sociopaths and how to deal with them. The book is comprehensive and fascinating, providing a good introduction to the subject. Readers mention the lessons are challenging and different from anything they've experienced. Overall, the book is engaging and helps them consider their own past.

"...The scary part is - The Sociopath Next Door is not fiction and very real...." Read more

"...What I Liked This is the true story of a psychologist who has become personally frustrated by the damage done to others by one specific group..." Read more

"...It's everyday reading and is very, very helpful and enlightening. I commend Martha Stout for writing it. It was recommended by a therapist." Read more

"...She provides some great examples, such as "super skip" who fits the prototypical, textbook model to a near T. Then there is "Darlene" I believe the..." Read more

547 customers mention "Readability"547 positive0 negative

Customers find the book engaging and entertaining. They describe it as a valuable read for anyone interested in the subject matter. The book is described as an eye-opening guide for spotting potential sociopaths, and it's a quick read that captures readers' attention.

"...experience also makes The Sociopath Next Door one of the best books on the subject...." Read more

"...It's a fast, crazy read, if I may make light of something so dark." Read more

"...This isn't a technical book that's hard to understand. It's everyday reading and is very, very helpful and enlightening...." Read more

"...personalities, her verbiage and rhythmic writing tone make them fun and terrifying to read about, and if taken as a short read intended to introduce..." Read more

267 customers mention "Readable"205 positive62 negative

Customers find the book readable and well-written. They appreciate the clear writing style and rhythmic tone. The sentences make sense and are complete pages. Readers find the characters easy to identify with and instantly recognizable.

"...Writing appears to come to her naturally as every sentence makes sense, and is a complete page turner even if it was all just fiction...." Read more

"...I've learned a lot from this book which is easy to read and understand...." Read more

"...great examples of psychopathic personalities, her verbiage and rhythmic writing tone make them fun and terrifying to read about, and if taken as a..." Read more

"...The book was written well and reads quickly...." Read more

44 customers mention "Story quality"39 positive5 negative

Customers find the book engaging with personal stories and examples. They appreciate the intelligent study rather than sensational stories, the variety of situational events, and the good conclusion. The author uses anecdotes, although some are not scientifically sound.

"...The book is divided into stories (composites from Dr. Stouts' patient stories) interspersed with Dr. Stouts' theories about the evolutionary,..." Read more

"...The author uses anecdotes, and although such are not considered scientific evidence, they do make for a good "story" element in this book..." Read more

"...The other stories are good too...." Read more

"...The book is maybe seventy percent storytelling and thirty percent pop psychobabble...." Read more

26 customers mention "Look"21 positive5 negative

Customers enjoy the book's appearance. They find it visually appealing and engaging, with a great picture depicting the characters. The dialogue, poetry, and innocence of the characters are described as charming and girlish. Readers appreciate that the book is never dull and never boring, and consider it an impressive and precious read that can save lives.

"Fascinating and enlightening look into the psyche of a Sociopath...." Read more

"...seeps into a cacophony of internal dialogue, waxed poetry and girlish innocence...." Read more

"...of this behavior- meeting someone who is very cheerful, friendly, charming, the list goes on...." Read more

"...In the beginning he was a tall, sexy, joke-telling, never-married, seemingly charming person...." Read more

25 customers mention "Value for money"22 positive3 negative

Customers find the book a good value for money. They say the content is well-written and easy to read.

"...of the human psyche, the composite "case studies" alone are worth the price of admission. The book was written well and reads quickly...." Read more

"...about the origins of sociopathy and --bang!--she had a sexed-up, sellable book." Read more

"...for Dealing with Sociopaths in Everyday Life" alone is worth the price of the book. The concept of everyday sociopaths is very controversial...." Read more

"...Well worth the investment and can save you a lot of trouble and even grief if your life should become entangled with one of these people." Read more

113 customers mention "Sociopathic mindset"55 positive58 negative

Customers have different views on the sociopathic mindset. Some find it interesting and feel empathy for conscienceless people, especially their manipulating emotions. Others find the concept of a soulless being incapable of empathy poorly explained, and the final chapter clunky and bizarre.

"...This book further validated what I'd realized and helped me get past the abuse...." Read more

"...What!?!?! In this case the Pity Play seems eye-poppingly bizarre, but she's no doubt been doing this to get out of trouble her whole life...." Read more

"...-if you can- not having a conscience, none at all, no feelings of guilt or remorse no matter what you do, no limiting sense of concern for the well-..." Read more

"...However, she also takes some inappropriate liberties that nearly stopped me from finishing the book several times; these departures and..." Read more

71 customers mention "Scariness level"41 positive30 negative

Customers have different views on the book's scariness level. Some find it fun and terrifying to read about, with chilling stories that illustrate how conscienceless monsters operate. Others feel it focuses too much on evoking fear and shock instead of providing useful information.

"...I recommend this book highly because of her "warning signs" list and details that will teach you how to spot these individuals...." Read more

"...inconsistency in the model that suggests that these individuals are unfeeling...." Read more

"...her verbiage and rhythmic writing tone make them fun and terrifying to read about, and if taken as a short read intended to introduce one to the..." Read more

"This book is very interesting, but ultimately it was just too creepy! I could only read half of it before putting it away...." Read more

Contact with Dr. Stout
5 out of 5 stars
Contact with Dr. Stout
I've written a novel dealing specifically with sociopaths and the detection thereof. During my research I found Dr. Stout's wonderful book, and it turned out to be the one source that encapsulated the straight-forward message that I was looking for. That is that sociopaths are usually undetected yet abundant. I've yet to publish and would like very much to talk to Dr. Stout about my particular book and the use of her name and material. I can be contacted at muserwood@yahoo.com
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on April 25, 2012
    I love the "The Sociopath Next Door" so much I read it again and again. I have had it several months now on my Kindle. The author Martha Stout is such an excellent writer is one reason that I can read it over and over. Writing appears to come to her naturally as every sentence makes sense, and is a complete page turner even if it was all just fiction. The scary part is - The Sociopath Next Door is not fiction and very real. Her education and clinical experience also makes The Sociopath Next Door one of the best books on the subject. Martha does not "guess," "suspect" or even "vent" - she has seen it time and time again in her practice and "it" has a name. "Sociopathic behavior." Her job has obviously been "janitor" clean up crew behind the lie laden trails of some great sociopaths - who have found a way to her client.

    Martha Stout also has a way of introducing very real descriptions of a Sociopaths behavior right down to the true - but laughable conduct of a Sociopath, who after their first goal of "impression management" is achieved is sitting in your living room, watching your TV and asking you to fetch them a drink!" By then I am thinking "close Martha" but then she gets even more detailed about that particular prototype..." who also feigns depression because everyone will help a depressed person and no one will have the gall to ask them to get off the couch and stop watching a TV they don't even own." By that moment I felt Martha had been over to my house! She even gets deeper than that.

    As you will learn in the book there are a few types of sociopaths and the couch ornament is just one.

    Fairly pathetic a book can completely define every trait of someone in your present or past life - and even suggest what to do [run fast if you can]. It may mean if a person can be defined to a "tee," and each and every sentence in a book such as The Sociopath next Door applies to someone you know, you may be dealing with a non-person. A person with zero conscience. On the other hand, if you cannot be defined within the borders of a book - you may have a life and if you want to live it happily after a post sociopathic run in - read the book.
    7 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on January 21, 2013
    I married a sociopath a few months ago. I thought there was something weird about the way he had a history of hurting others but denying any responsibility. He was so charming to me and pretended to agree with me on pretty much everything, but a few times before the wedding, he became cruel. I blew it off thinking everyone has a bad day sometimes. After the wedding, he escalated into pure monster. He went into angry rages over tiny things several times a day, yelled and called me names, drove recklessly and sometimes ran people off the road, became physically aggressive with me, harassed his co-workers, conned people out of money, "forgot" his wallet EVERY time we went out to eat either alone or with others, and worse. (I don't want to share the x-rated details--but he was just as inconsiderate and cruel there as he was in every other area.) My first clue that something was wrong wasn't because he was being so mean, but was because he always blamed the person he hurt. He verbally attacked at me pretty much non-stop with hateful glaring in between outbursts, but told me I deserved it for getting on his nerves. But the things that were getting on his nerves would never bother normal people--stuff like getting dust on his jacket, (dust that I couldn't even see,) asking to stop to use the bathroom on long car rides, (seven hours with no food or bathroom break,) asking him not to scream at my child, accidentally stepping on the edge of his prized bath mat and getting dirt on it, (must have been invisible dirt,)not being able to read his mind, and more. Sometimes I was screamed at for things that never happened. For example, he had a real fetish about his bath mat and one day went crazy saying I was standing on it. (I definitely wasn't because I'd learned to walk on eggshells to avoid the rages.) He insisted I was on it and I looked down and pointed at my feet showing I was definitely NOT standing on it. He still insisted and I finally gave up and left the room crying with helplessness. Of course, crying really set him off. Every time he drove me to it with his cruel behavior, he'd start screaming at me for crying. I was in a state of fear and shock most of the time. He was insane and there was no hope. I pointed out to him that I didn't treat him that way. I didn't yell, cuss, scream, get in his face, attack him or call him names and he seriously said that's because he never did anything wrong. Actually, I pointed out, it's because healthy people in relationships compromise and don't abuse each other over meaningless things. They discuss the big things and let go of the little stuff. He was intensely cruel--denying me heat on cold days, forcing me and my child to go hungry, changing my cell phone number so friends couldn't find me, putting a keystroke logger on my computer so he could stalk me and get into my accounts, ordering me to give up my friends, etc.... But of course, none of the rules for me applied to him. He had to be right at all costs, even if I could get out a book or web page and show he was not right. He'd scream and go crazy. I finally just let everything go and avoided him as much as possible. He has a way of, (mostly,) avoiding arrest and repercussions, but he definitely has anti-social personality disorder. It took me a while to figure out what was wrong with him and his history of bad behavior, but it slowly came to me. It helped that our therapist saw him in action and validated my theories. This book further validated what I'd realized and helped me get past the abuse. I left the guy after 6 weeks, and even that was too long, but I don't feel bad. I wasn't a person to him. No one is. It wasn't personal; it was just a monster with no conscience using me just like he used everyone else. I can't wait until my divorce is final and I'm intellectually armed now, so I will recognize any other sociopaths that try to charm me!

    One part I really liked about this book was the section discussing how sociopaths in clubs will often charm a couple people to protect themselves. My sociopath had those people. No matter how crazy he acted with me or other people, (I have since received condolence letters from multiple women who experienced the terror before me,) he would impress his cover people at all costs. These two women have zero idea that they are a front for a sociopath. When he acts insane, he swears it isn't him because so-and-so is his good friend and can vouch for him. I had noticed this on my own, but reading about the phenomenon in the book again validated what I was noticing on my own.

    Bottom line: if something feels really wrong about your relationship with someone--it IS really wrong.
    54 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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  • vida cropas
    5.0 out of 5 stars A deep understanding of victims.
    Reviewed in Canada on July 11, 2024
    The study of Antisocial Personalty Disorder is relatively new, and nothing seems written in stone. "Experts" tend to have different opinions. Some think that psychopathy and cluster B personality disorders should be considered as a spectrum disorder, as is autism, for example. Others will state that sociopaths do have a conscience but were brought up in harsh/criminal environments and acquired a callous disregard for anyone outside their own group of family members and cohorts. They will purport that narcissists also have a conscience but suffer from an inflated ego and feel superior to all others, and that psychopaths are the dangerous ones with no conscience at all...

    Hence, all these terms are often used interchangeably...Then the numbers are also argued...Do these disorders represent 4% of the population, or 14%? ( if indeed similar disorders were lumped together with grey areas of assessment charts being included)... I have never found a book to explain and demystify the above. "Experts" seem to have different theories on the subject...

    Ms. Stout is a Psychological Trauma Therapist. Her book is brilliantly written, very interesting, and insightful, and she does have a deep empathy and understanding of what victims go through. She also touches on the history of the disorder, and a number of studies. She points out the pervasive social impacts that predators have on society in general and provides clear examples. I certainly do recommend this book.
  • Amazon Kunde
    5.0 out of 5 stars Gut
    Reviewed in Germany on January 22, 2025
    Mir hat das Buch gefallen und ich empfehle es weiter
  • Bertin Gonzalez
    5.0 out of 5 stars Best book of these Topic
    Reviewed in Mexico on October 15, 2019
    Great reading you can’t stop one time you start reading i ended up in one day
    Highly recommended
    A passionate topic
  • Diana
    5.0 out of 5 stars Perfecto
    Reviewed in Spain on December 31, 2018
    Entretenido y veraz
  • jenesaisrien
    5.0 out of 5 stars Vous connaissez certainement un sociopathe sans savoir qu'il l'est !
    Reviewed in France on December 5, 2018
    Ils sont nombreux autour de nous, et quoiqu'on en souffre au quotidien, beaucoup ignorent comment les appeler et surtout comment s'en préserver... avant qu'il ne soit trop tard. Même scenario avec les pervers narcissiques. L'auteur a bien décrit les comportements de ces prédateurs hautement toxiques.
    Dommage qu'en France on n'y accorde pas l'intérêt mérité, ce qui éviterait à maintes innocentes personnes de bonne volonté de se retrouver intimement désarticulées dans les cabinets médicaux aux "spécialistes" inconscients...