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Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship with an Entrepreneur Hardcover – January 14, 2013
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From the Author: 10 Quick Tips to Incorporate into Your Entrepreneurial Relationship Today
- Never Schedule High Priorities Activities or Deadlines on Fridays: Doing so will likely create a scenario that drifts into Friday night, Saturday, and then Sunday. Always be realistic about the ebb and flow of the work cycle.
- Don't Bring Up Charged Topics at Bedtime: Your bedroom should be a sanctuary and a safe haven from the demands of the world. Never start a conflict when your you and your partner are in bed and dozing off to sleep.
- Laugh and Laugh Often: We believe you can never hug each other enough, say you love each other too much, or laugh too often.
- Apologize and Forgive: Practice apologizing when you hurt your partner's feelings. Offer forgiveness when your partner has been careless with your feelings. Know that you will try to be your best self but that you will often fail and will need to hone your apology skills.
- Have a Life Dinner Once a Month: Make a reservation right now at one of your favorite restaurants. Go out--just the two of you. Buy your significant other a gift. Turn off your cell phones and hand them to the other person. Spend a long slow dinner enjoying each other's company.
- Set Limits on Technology: You do not need to do just one more e-mail right before bedtime. You really don't. You need to sleep well and restore yourself and reset your brain chemistry during a nice night of rest. Those who need to take breaks from technology are often the least likely to do it.
- Live Where You Want to Live: Pick the place where you want to live and build your life around it. Our contributors to the book, Mark and Pam Solon, say "We believe it's important for young people embarking on their lives to realize that geography matters in your happiness quotient and that it can even out--weigh the highest-paying job opportunities."
- Life Is a Marathon, Not a Sprint: Another contributor to the book, Dave Jilk, says "If I could send my younger self a message from the future, it would tell me to treat my career more like a marathon than a sprint."
- Commit to Each Other's Dreams: "Recognizing that one's partner is pursuing their dream, they are satisfied down to their soul and, in so being satisfied, are that much more alive. That level of aliveness is a gift few partners can ever give, and successful couples recognize this," say Tim Enwall and Hillary Hall.
- Always Answer His or Her Calls! While it might seem like a small gesture, the cumulative impact of doing so on a regular basis shows your partner they matter to you.
"There have been many thousands of pages dedicated to successful entrepreneurship, but rarely a word spoken about leading a successful entrepreneurial life until the release of “Startup Life.” In what I consider to be the first must-read book of the year, Amy Batchelor and Brad Feld artfully tackle the subject with an astonishing level of transparency and authenticity. No subject is off-limits, including emotional struggles, sexual intimacy, financial decision-making, and family planning."
“One of the most appealing aspects of Startup Life is that Brad and Amy are not dogmatic. They offer various suggestions from their own lives, as well as vignettes provided by other startup couples, which Brad believes make the book more impactful and balanced…Although the book’s ideal audience is an entrepreneurial couple on the front-end of their relationship, even veteran entrepreneurs can learn something from Startup Life.”
Top Customer Reviews
It feels to me as if there are three life phases you can read this book in:
1 - As a younger entrepreneur with less relationship experience who absorbs some of this material but now has a permanent pointer for when they really need it in the future.
2 - As an entrepreneurial couple in the midst of relationship issues. So many of the things that were pointed out seem obvious now, but in apex of my marital challenges, this book would have been a godsend. Or a smack in the head!
3 - As more mature entrepreneurs who glean tips and reminders to stay on course, plus a desire to pass the book onto fellow entrepreneurs and couples in phases 1 and 2. I'm working hard, as an example, to incorporate shorter Qx vacations for my wife and I. In my limited experience with Qx, they really spur creativity and a remembrance of why life is awesome.
The one phrase from the book I can't get out of my head is "you can always make more money but you can't make more time"
It is ironic that I finished the book traveling on a business trip, but I couldn't wait to get home.
Brad and Amy did something brave in writing this book. They were open and honest.Read more ›
The interesting thing, too, is that the book also gives a lot of insight into the lifestyle and habits of successful entrepreneurs, almost like a "Seven Habits" book would. Stories of spending too many hours at the office, not seeing the kids, working while on vacation, all abound. Anybody who is looking to see what kind of effort it takes to live the startup life would also be wise to pick up this book.
Full disclosure: I am married to an entrepreneur and contributed a short passage to this book. I've lived through having my husband take a business call while riding Thunder Mountain at Disneyland, and amazingly we're still together.
The book also has dozens of short vignettes from friends of Brad and Amy which provides some nice alternative points of view. After reading them you almost feel like you were dropped into the startup world of Boulder.
A much needed reference that spells out potential pitfalls and provides realistic approaches to deal with some of the most difficult issues in an entrepreneur's personal life.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I wish I had read this before my husband and I split. I think it may have helped us survive the intense startup culture in SF.Published 4 months ago by RCorinneSmith
I just started my first project and it has transformed my life and my relaitonship. Had it not been for this book that transformation would have been much rougher. Read morePublished 10 months ago by Kelsey
As husband + wife co-founders, this book has been invaluable for maintaining a healthy perspective, and a bit of sanity in a crazy endeavor. Read morePublished 10 months ago by Andrew Dickson
I highly recommend this book to all my founder friends and their significant others. After reading this book, I immediately passed it off to my spouse and said: "See, it's not... Read morePublished 11 months ago by JLinCA
Essentially a way to share some stories and some common sense lessons in a revenue generating form. Good information but not life changing. Some editing mistakes as well.Published 12 months ago by Jason Wilcox
Brad and Amy deliver a wonderful story about successfully navigating many of the opportunities and challenges associated with being an entrepreneur or being married to one. Read morePublished 14 months ago by Ryan Frankel
I read this book as quickly as I could - Thank you Amy, I thoroughly enjoyed your thoughts, particularly at the beginning of the book. Read morePublished 14 months ago by Anna Z.
As a first time entrepreneur, this book has been critical to balancing startup life and a personal relationship. Read morePublished 15 months ago by Bill's Kindle
This book was a great read for me because, relationship advice aside, it provides a good deal of insight into the personal and social side of life as an entrepreneur. Read morePublished 16 months ago by James Bailey