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Showing 61-70 of 764 reviews(Verified Purchases). See all 996 reviews
on February 3, 2014
This book has been my savior in this horrible situation. The second I started reading it I realized my family member suffers from BPD, and my entire life with her just flashed before me. Every description and every page I would highlight b/c I had experienced this with my family member! I started to understand that it was never me, and also realized I've managed my relationship with her very differently than anyone else in my life, I haven't imagined her behavior! I've struggled my whole life with this person, and this book helps me feel like I can take back control of my life. It also helps me not feel like I'm in the "wrong" all the time…like she's suggested my whole life. I highly recommend this book if you need guidance into this disorder. It's incredible how accurate it is for my family member, and I'm hoping the more I read it the better I'll feel. I don't feel alone or confused anymore.
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VINE VOICEon March 24, 2013
Despite having degrees in Psychology and Sociology and years of work experience with developmental and cognitive disorders AND having a family member with this diagnosis, I really knew nothing about Borderline Personality Disorder.

For years I would often think this about the behavior of a handful of people in my life: "Am I crazy for thinking this is crazy? It's off, but how off is this?"

The one family member with the diagnosis fits the BPD bill to a 'T', but reading through this book allowed me to consider traits that were present in others in my life.

Honestly, I felt ill at times reading this book and thinking about how much I'd been doing 'wrong' when trying to work on these relationships. Wrong for myself, wrong for them. This book provides invaluable information that can provide more purposeful and mindful approaches to handling situations with people you care about who express this disorder or related traits...all the while without losing your head OR questioning your personal worth.

At any rate, finding this book was a serendipitous event and I'm so glad that I had a chance to read it.
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on March 24, 2010
Having been totally bamboozled by someone I loved dearly who showed me most days that he adored me very intensely and then had some moments (usually when there was stress) where he would behave so very badly and coldly I have spent nearly 4 years trying to understand the abrupt end to our relationship - and remembering some of the things I had chosen to forget =from one day being told how much you are loved to coming home to a five year relationship gone - they have gone -all belongings gone including some of yours - and a note that doesn't make the least bit of sense but seems to suggest that it was something you did - and then not to let you actually talk about it - it has been hell - this book helped me a little - some things I have marked in the book to revisit -the key thing for me is the split thing - I was idolised and am now demonised - I was slowly isolated - I was the only person from his planet as far as he was concerned - I was everything and felt I was loved for 'me' for the first time - and then I was nothing - hard to stop yourself from wallowing and second guessing - and still do - but this book will spark one or two thoughts in your head of recognition if you are trying to come to terms with your own situation - and it does help - but be prepared for that sinking feeling that in all probability if that person came back to you (and admit it you want them to) they will do it again and maybe worse the next time - because you let it happen - understanding it is not enough and this book also reminds you not to be the lighthouse that gets out in the water - you can do only what you can do - shine your beacon but you can't wade out...
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on March 18, 2011
This book only escalates the damage done to relationships. Two superior books are Valerie Porr's Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder and When Hope Is Not Enough, by Bon Dobbs. Tough love DOES NOT work.
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on October 6, 2016
The Book I ordered was the latest edition but I received the first edition. It was NOT what I ordered. I am not happy with this because I could have purchased the first edition one much cheaper. It was falsely advertised....the picture of cover and description says it's the LATEST Edition but it was not....BEWARE!
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on September 4, 2015
This book has been VERY helpful for me and the rest of my family. Anyone that has someone with BPD in their lives needs to read this. It's a great first step to reclaiming your life. As the parent of someone with BPD it's helped me to start setting up parameters and safeties for myself and my own sanity.
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on December 27, 2013
Crystal clear that it is not me - it is her. Lays it out, lets you draw your own conclusion, and tells you what you can do (not much, by the way. The bad news was learning the subject does not see themselves as having a problem, you really can't tell them, and they will not agree to get help. But now that I know...)
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on July 16, 2016
Excellent book for working with people with BPD. As a therapist I recommend this to anyone who is looking for answers and wants real solutions that will empower you and help you stay out of an enabling role. Self care is very important when working or living with someone with PBD. Also, consider consulting with a professional who does EMDR to address the trauma in their lives.
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on January 14, 2014
I got this book because of my difficulty dealing with a friend with borderline personality disorder (BPD). After reading the book, I realized that my mother, my sister, and several of my friends have/had this disorder. I feel qualified to make the diagnosis because I am a medical doctor. However, we did not cover this disorder in great depth in medical school-- probably because we did not know that much about it until recently. So, I delved into study of the matter: I read everything I could get my hands on about BPD. Of all the books I read (including one designed specifically for medical personnel), this one is the clearest and best. I would recommend starting with this book, then getting others if needed/wanted.
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on January 3, 2017
This book is really helpful to understand all sides of BPD. Great ideas for how to deal with lots of situations. The quotes from those with BPD and from people with all kinds of relationships with them have helped me in so many ways - invaluable! The resource list is very thorough, and I will be referring to it often. Thank you so much!
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