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on December 9, 2010
I love this book and I was very surprised when I read the chapter about you being your own bully. I realized the information you tell yourself is either helpful or hurtful and if you are just hurting yourself out of habit then realize it and let it go. This book will help you do that.
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on May 3, 2015
Gave this to a friend who was having problems with bully husband. It helped her recognize what he was doing to her. He would bring her flowers and apologize and then repeat bad behavior. This book really shows the different manipulative behaviors of the bully.
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on November 2, 2015
Good useful iinformation
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on February 27, 2015
gift
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on July 21, 2014
One of the best reads ever. I was going through a tough divorce and this book along with much prayer and biblical guidance brought me through. Dr. Testa book provides exercises in the book to help you overcome anger, resentment, and Un forgiveness I needed to move on with my life. Great job Dr.Testa
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on August 31, 2013
Very easy to read. The author noted almost every attribute of my bully/narcissistic husband:) very well written and very helpful for anyone living with an abusive/bully spouse.
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on December 6, 2010
Thank you for the quick delivery. My book was in excellent condition. It arrived quickly what a plus. Will order again. Thank you....
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on December 10, 2012
This book is okay, however it does not give you specific copyideas as to how you can cope when financially stuck in a tortureous abusivie marriage such as a spouce committing identity theft against you while your were ill.
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on August 17, 2007
The Bully in Your Relationship: Stop Emotional Abuse and Get the Love You Deserve by Anne-Renee Testa, Ph.D. is one of the most helpful books about emotional abuse available. This up-to-date guide is easy to read, if sometimes painful to digest, and comes across more like a counseling session than the usual impersonal textbooks on the topic.

Although the first half of The Bully details the types of bullies and the denial abused people employ to stay in damaging relationships, the second half makes it all worthwhile. Dr. Testa states, "This impressive body of knowledge you've gained gives you a solid foundation to stand on as you move forward. You know all about the bullying problem--backward, forward, upside down, and inside out. Now it's time for the solution: my A.R.T. Method."

The A.R.T. method: Acknowledge, Reassess, Take action is based on some of the principles underlying popular 12-step programs and includes workbook activities which will prove a boon to the person who has the suspicion that something may be terribly wrong with their relationship. Dr. Testa's A.R.T. method will help anyone in a bullying relationship take a fresh look at the bully in their lives, tame the bully that lies within them, and begin the slow, rewarding process of change that will ultimately give them the power to overcome their situation.

One important caveat: Dr. Testa does not acknowledge the real, physical danger some women (and men) face in violent relationships, and at one point states "Open up a space in your mind, and affirm the following...'I'm safe and secure...I'm not in any danger--the fear that I'm feeling right now is about the past, not the present.'" Most experts agree that while "doing it scared" is necessary to overcoming abuse, taking safety precautions can be vital: retaliation all too often results in physical attacks, lasting trauma, and sometimes, sadly, even death.
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on June 19, 2014
This book has helped me with my own family and especially with being assertive and saying how I feel on the spot.
Setting boundaries was really hard for me at one time, but this book really helped me with that. It gave me courage to stand up for myself. I do say I DO MATTER
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