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Showing 1-10 of 127 reviews(Verified Purchases). See all 143 reviews
on June 26, 2007
I bought this book, The Enabler, for my mother-in-law because the title and description seem to fit her perfectly. However, as I read the book from cover-to-cover I quickly realized that there were some enabling "issues" that were in my life as well. This book is written in friendly, easy terms; it doesn't use language that is over the average person's head. Since the author, Angelyn Miller, wrote about her personal life, I felt that I could connect with her on a personal level, and I am hoping that my mother-in-law can do the same. If a person who is an enabler would truly take this book to heart, it could literally change that person's life - for the better. The book is very straight-forward, and it even has "worksheets" and exercises to help the reader become the person that he/she would like to be.
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on June 2, 2010
As a true former enabler, I found this book incredibly helpful. Beginning with the opening poem, I was hooked. I studied the book carefully. The worksheets were helpful and I did them all. I had a son in treatment and need to maintain all the skills I have learned during that process (in fact, the book was recommended by the program). Through reading the book, I learned many subtle ways people enable others, and means of overcoming this destructive behavior. I am in a twelve-step recovery program, and the content in this book was a terrific adjunct to the readings and work I have done there. I highly recommend it to people with alcoholic/addicted children, spouses, partners, friends, co-workers. Enabling really does hurt the ones you love. By learning to love yourself more and develop healthy boundaries, you actually nourish the ones you love and set them free to discover who they are.
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on November 14, 2015
The best book for those of us who are co-dependents and enablers. When I read the book it was like reading my life story. Hits home. I am in recovery from being addicted to my children. No kidding. It is the hardest work I've ever done - with the help of a professional - I am facing the fact that I was not doing my adult children a favor by rescuing, saving, and trying to fix their lives in the name of motherly love.
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on October 15, 2013
Excellent read for those struggling with relationships and being an enabler. I am not from any kind of chemical dependent home, but my parents were. Therefore, they raised our family under the same principals and expectations. I see how it has handicapped my adult life in relation to my marriage, with my children and in relation with my siblings. I want to stop now so my children can grow to be very self dependent adults and not see them miserable under the weight of others issues or rather them depend on others to always take care of them.
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on July 22, 2014
Sadly I was quite disappointed in this book.There were very little specific examples of strategies to assist the enabler in creating better boundaries and developing more assertive practices to avoid continuing the enabling patterns.To be fair I could empathise with the writer but found nothing I didn't already know.I didn't really feel it was value for money.
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on July 24, 2016
My mother, a former enabler, got our family into counseling when I was in elementary school. My father was an alcoholic, and she was desperate for help. During the past 40 years since that time, I have joined her on her journey and quest to become as emotionally healthy as possible. This book is one of the very best that I've read on enabling.
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on April 27, 2016
What an eye opener this book has been. If you have trouble with enabling the ones that you love, please purchase this book. Not only will this book help y;I, but also your loved ones will benefit from your reading the book. They will become more independent, and you will has more time for YOU!
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on January 18, 2016
This book is very well written and easy to read. It is a very good book on codependency. I am very pleased with this book and it is very helpful.
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on October 27, 2013
the book is very helpful and makes you look at the truth. You know the truth, but won't face it square in the eye - this book makes you confront what you already know in your head - the heart is more difficult. I am doing better. My child is in recovery and doing well. I am about taking care of my self at this point - not always easy to put yourself first as a mother. Things may continue to get better with my child, they may not - either way I have to stay on the path of non-enabling.
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on December 25, 2016
Very helpful book. I expected the book to go on forever delving into every corner of my existence, and this one was delightfully quick, to the point with helpful guiding changes after having your eyes opened from the poignant story visuals.
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