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Showing 1-10 of 523 reviews(verified purchases). Show all reviews
on March 9, 2004
This book was truly an eye-opener for me. I didn't think Dr. Laura's easy to implement suggestions would work, but they have. It is amazing. I see my husband and marriage in a new light, it feels exciting. I wish I could give this book more than 5 stars. I don't understand the detractors at all. Thank you Dr. Laura for telling us the truth and being a courageous voice in this day and age!
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on January 8, 2004
[...]This book is a wonderful resource for any wife who would like to improve her relationship with her husband. As has been mentioned before, Dr. Laura intersperses her advice with letters, emails, and phone conversations from her radio program to illustrate each chapter's main point. The book's main body consists of eight chapters dealing with a distinct factor on improving the husband-wife relationship.
[...]
These are the main points of Dr. Laura's book. Basically, as one reviewer put it so well, love is indeed a verb, not just a noun. I'm finding that acting on some of the advice given in this book has already caused a definite happier atmosphere in our home.
It's not about being a "doormat", downtrodden, or subservient. It's about loving and respecting the man you chose to marry.
Just because Dr. Laura's past has skeletons, does it really make her advice negligible? It's not as if this book is all just her opinion. There is plenty of advice from people who have emailed and written letters to her--those who are in happy marriages, troubled marriages, and everywhere in between.
The reason I gave the book 4 out of 5 stars: the letter/email/phone call excerpts within the chapters caused information overload at times. The main points could still have been made without getting bogged down in too many real-life examples.
In any case, trying the advice given in this book can only help your marriage. You can't go wrong giving your husband love!
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on January 30, 2016
I buy tons of things on Amazon and this is the first time I feel the urge to write a review. In one word, this book saved my marriage!

I met my husband four years ago and we have been married for three years with a beautiful baby boy. Our relationship started full of passionate love. It was love of the first sight, and then after time passes by, we truly believed we were made for each other and we were each other's soul mates. We both felt the other person satisfied every fantasy we had on every dimension when it comes to the other half that's supposed to complete us. I regarded him as the manly man and my hero and he regarded me as his sweet flower. We were both around 30 years old, so we were not some teenagers who have never seen other men or women.

We got engaged six months after we met and got married six months after the engagement. We can't even wait for a year to plan the wedding! Then we had a baby a year later. The arrival of the baby changed everything. First we started to have different strong opinions regarding how to care for the tiny baby, then it's his family, then my family. All of sudden, before we knew it, we were pretty much fighting about everything, no matter how trivial it is. I felt true despair. If what we had cannot be called true love, then what can? I stepped into marriage with the rosy view that with our true l love, admiration for each other, nothing will stand in the way of our happy ever after life. The reality is the opposite.

And all the conflicts are not there because one of us is slacking off or shirking the responsibilities as a parent. We both work really hard and are terrific parents. I have a career but managed to breastfeed my baby until he is almost two. I clean, do laundry, and cook fresh delicious home-made meal for dinner every day. He works super hard at his job and he provides a great life for the family (a big house, nice cars, etc etc.). Once he gets off work, he comes home right away to take care of the baby. He devotes all his time on the weekend to the baby without me asking for it. And we truly still love each other. When we fight, we both feel deeply hurt and still care about each other. So we make up, but then something will trigger another fight a week later. The cycle continues.

So I searched for answers. I believe in solutions in every problem. Finally I came across this book. Even with all the great reviews, I was skeptical initially. Then I was completely blown away by the truth revealed in the book. For example, I used to believe since we have true love between my husband and me, so I am supposed to "share" whatever is on my mind whenever I want. If his reaction is not what I expected (patient, understanding etc., the stuff depicted in a movie), I get annoyed. So quote this book "Somehow wives have come to believe that with respect to communication, more is better. Wrong. More appropriately selected and times is better." So true! Another example is I love him so much because I think he is such a manly man. As a result, I neglected the fact that he has emotional weakness too. And he actually relies on me more for emotional support that I need him! (As we girls are natural talkers and we talk to everybody.) But I just brushed it off as he is not being himself.

I think the root of the problem is that as an independent career woman, we have been influenced too much by the feminism stuff. When I was growing up, my mom always "work hard and be independent, then you don't have to rely on a man and be his submissive wife." So I equate "a submissive wife" with "a loving understanding wife who respects his husband's opinions". Even though all these are subconscious cuz I always think of myself as a woman with traditional value, who acknowledge the differences between genders, who think some extreme values of feminism are actually hurting women. I didn't know I was influenced subconsciously!

If I ever have a daughter of my own one day, this is what I will tell her: work hard, and be independent, just because you want to be responsible for yourself as a human being, not for any other reasons. Don't have extreme views regarding men, they are not untrustworthy but they are not your savior either. Treat them as a truly equal. Respect them, love them, and they will return in ten folds.

The only negative part of this book, is that the author seems to try sneaking in some religious stuff related to God. You can just ignore it if you are not religious. Doesn't reduce the value of the book.
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on February 19, 2016
Love this book. I highlighted so much of it that was true of my first marriage. Dr. Laura writes in an extremely easy style-it's like her radio show. She's direct and common-sense. She makes the point that husbands need to LOVE their wives and wives need to RESPECT their husbands. She tells the reader that most normal men will do anything to love and please their wives as long as they get RESPECT. Without respect, a man is nothing. So many modern women grew up not knowing how to treat their man and wonder why he's miserable or why he leaves. This book answers those questions.
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on July 29, 2016
I think all married women need to read this, especially independent women like myself. I personally am a recovering feminist and this book has helped my marriage tremendously and has reshaped some of my beliefs. My husband thinks I'm pretty great because I never exploit his vulnerabilities, even in anger. I don't nag, and I recognize that he needs physical affection and affirmation to feel loved. He's my hero, and he treats me like his queen.
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on March 9, 2016
The women who need to read this book the most will certainly not read it -- turned off by the title or the author. However, while far from politically correct, this book has a lot to say to women like me who grew up with poor role models when it came to demonstrating how to be a loving wife. When I think of all my father had to put up with from my mother, I feel so bad for him. He was such a hard worker and a good provider and my mom never let up on him. It was never enough. He'd come home from an exhausting day, and she'd dump on him everything that went wrong in her day. This book made me stop and evaluate how I'm doing as a wife and to see that role as one of extreme importance.
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on January 25, 2004
I have always admired Dr. Laura's radio program, and I would recommend this book to all the couples I know. She gives voice to thoughts and ideas I'm sure most husbands feel but are either unable to clearly identify or too reluctant to share with their wives. Dr. Laura's book is a message of empowerment for wives: women have the inherent power to take the lead in bringing and keeping love, happiness, and intimacy in their marriages, and most husbands will follow and reward their wives many times over.
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on March 22, 2016
I've been married to the same fantastic man for 45 years .... that everyone else adored and bragged on all the time......except me : ( regretfully.
This book taught me many new personality traits of men in general helping me to be more caring, honoring, and loving to my husband, hero and protector. Read and reread it for continued reminders and joys of making your marriage so much more a blessing to you both. The informational insight are so very true. It is so easy when you understand your husband as a man and how he thinks. Thanks a million.
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on February 5, 2016
This book is incredible! Laura is one of the very best and most savvy women on the planet! This book teaches women how to have an excellent marriage by simply understanding their man and taking care of his needs. Its very simple, show him affection, acceptance and admiration and he'll hang the moon for you. Smart women take her advise, dumb women just keep being miserable.
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on July 20, 2016
If you are open to improving your marriage and understanding your spouse, read this book. While many will see the advice as old fashioned and possibly sexist, the principles behind it have helped many people save their relationships. We should all be open to doing whatever it takes to make our marriages strong. And if you are in it to win it, the book explains how your pride must die in order for your marriage to win.
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