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Tweakerworld: A Memoir Hardcover – March 7, 2023

by Jason Yamas (Author)

4.6 50 ratings

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Meet Jason: a college educated documentary film producer, cat parent of two, and one of San Francisco’s top drug dealers.

After Jason’s world falls apart in LA, he moves to Berkeley for a fresh start with his kid brother. Just one problem: his long-closeted Adderall addiction has exploded into an out-of-control crystal meth binge. Within weeks, Jason plunges into the sprawling ParTy n’ ’Play subculture of the Bay Area’s gay community. It is a wildly decadent scene of drugs, group sex, and criminals, and yet it is also filled with surprising characters, people who are continually subverting Jason’s own presumptions of the stereotypical tweaker.

Soon Jason becomes a dealer on the pretense of researching this tweaker world for a project that will carry him, like a life raft, back to the shores of a normal life. But his friendly entrepreneurial spirit and trusting disposition disarm clients and rival dealers alike. The money begins to roll in as demand increases to frightening levels. Suddenly, Jason is in control of the entire crystal meth market for San Francisco’s gay community, even as he finds himself nodding off behind the wheel of his car, or walking down the sidewalk. As friends and family work frantically to steer him towards recovery, Jason resists, chasing something else: a sleepless nirvana fueled by sex, drugs, and the Tweakerworld.

With painful honesty, Jason Yamas has crafted a landmark narrative that is not just a personal account of addiction, but a portrait of a vulnerable, largely undocumented community of people who, for many reasons, have been marginalized to the point of invisibility.

Print length

272 pages
Language

English
Publisher

The Unnamed Press
Publication date

March 7, 2023
Dimensions

5.5 x 1 x 8.5 inches
ISBN-10

195121370X
ISBN-13

978-1951213701
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From the Publisher

Editorial Reviews

Review

“A vibrant, compelling memoir about gay culture and addiction. Brutally honest and thrillingly told, Tweakerworld shines a light on the dark places shame can lead us and demands we do not turn away. It is only through looking at them that we find a way out.” —JACK PARLETT, Author of Fire Island and The Poetics of Cruising

“Jason is an incredibly talented author who is able to do the masterful: take a story so lived in in its specificities and somehow engineer it so that it feels universal. His is a story both painfully unique, yet one that is dripping with humanity.” —EVAN ROSS KATZ, Writer

“Reading Jason Yamas’s memoir of crystal meth addiction—and, yes, of hope, can itself be a redemptive act. but it is also in some odd even troubling way a pleasure, which one realizes is what it feels like to be addicted.” —KEVIN SESSUMS, Bestselling author of Mississippi Sissy and I Left It On The Mountain

“Tweakerworld is many things: a raw confession, a solemn reflection, and a beautifully written page-turner. This intensely candid memoir shines a light on an underrepresented queer community in crisis. With humor, tenderness, and pathos, Yamas explores the connective tissue between addiction, sexuality, trauma, family, and identity.” —EMMA KOENIG, Author of F*ck I’m in My Twenties and Moan: Anonymous Essays on Female Orgasm

“There are few people brave enough to tell this story—and it’s one the world needs to hear—so what Jason Yamas has done with Tweakerworld is both groundbreaking and important. He traces the forces that lead a person into the world of PnP, captures the horror that lies in the wait, and the pathway out... Tweakerworld is a revelation.” —PATRICK STRUDWICK, Journalist

“If Gus Van Sant and Augusten Burroughs had a hot gay son that grew up to be a meth dealer, sex addict and general all-around lovable fuckup, this would be his story. And Jason Yamas tells it with heart and humor without taking out the perversity, insanity, despair and sweaty and erotic late night entanglements of living the PnP lifestyle to the extreme. Like the song that makes you cry in the middle of the dance floor, Tweakerworld gets you hard and breaks your heart at the same time.” —JOHN KROKIDAS, Director of Kill Your Darlings

“Some books are like doors to places so far removed from our experience that we might think they are other worlds: it may be tempting for anyone who has not experienced a crystal meth addiction to view this book this way. Yet this book insists, No, I am in your world… This is Yamas’s story of walking the line of survival and authenticity, grasping with insistent teeth at one of the core questions of queer life for those of us who grew up as the fodder for our culture’s moral panic: how can one bear so much shame and live?” —R/B MERTZ, Author of Burning Butch

“Tweakerworld is a profound examination of our worsening crystal meth crisis, its intersectionality with trauma and gay culture, and how one man fought to define—and love— himself amidst harrowing circumstances. At once heartbreaking and triumphant, Jason Yamas is unflinchingly brave with the lens he points at himself, addiction in its many forms, and the path to healing. From the first page to the last, I was inspired, humbled, and ever grateful for this gift of a memoir.” —REEMA ZAMAN, Author of I Am Yours: A Shared Memoir

About the Author

Jason Yamas is a queer fiction and nonfiction writer making his prose debut as author of Tweakerworld: A Memoir (Unnamed Press, 2023). Prior to his foray into literature, he produced documentary and narrative films such as Jonathan Caouette's Walk Away Renee (SundanceNow) and Stephen Winter's Jason & Shirley (Criterion). He produced charity arts and music projects in Detroit with the late great songwriter Allee Willis ("September", The Friends Theme, The Color Purple.) His self-directed and produced feature Not Me, Murphy premiered at the MIX NYC Film Festival. He's currently writing his first novel and pursuing acting training at the Sanford Meisner Center. He holds a BFA from NYU, Tisch School of the Arts in Drama and has performed in and directed in the experimental downtown New York theatre scene. With the publication of Tweakerworld, he intends to shine a bright light on the worsening epidemic of crystal meth in the LGBTQ+ community.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ The Unnamed Press (March 7, 2023)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 272 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 195121370X
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1951213701
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 14.4 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 1 x 8.5 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #702,080 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #851 in LGBTQ+ Biographies (Books)
- #1,468 in Substance Abuse Recovery
- #18,683 in Memoirs (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.6 50 ratings

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Sky Alexandra

Astounding, moving and expertly written!!

Reviewed in the United States on March 25, 2023

Verified Purchase

Jason Yamas draws you in to a hidden world that no one has the confidence to actually write about or tell I'm the real world. This is an insightful glance into a well known epidemic of drugs and the higher class crowd, especially guys. He speaks in a way that draws you in from the very beginning and it is hard to put down! I feel this is a breakthrough book into a world that we need to hear more about and I believe he will inspire others to follow his path although they won't live up to the adventure and actual realism in his expert story telling! A winner from start to finish!

One person found this helpful

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George V. Neville-Neil

A fast paced read and worth the time

Reviewed in the United States on April 3, 2023

Verified Purchase

If you’re going to write about meth dealing and addiction it helps to write fast and tight prose. An interesting story, well told. Supposedly this is also for those not in the world of addiction and PnP life but I find it hard to fathom a modern, urban, queer who has not been touched by the type of life discussed here. And really, is Mary from Peoria gonna pick this book up?

One person found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

Eye opening

Reviewed in the United States on June 3, 2023

Verified Purchase

The last chapter sums it all up. So good

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BetsyB.

I couldn't stop listening! A important look into an unfamiliar world.

Reviewed in the United States on March 25, 2023

Having known Jason over half his life as a play director (he is a fine actor) and now friend I struggled with exactly what to write. This is a deeply personal, frank, sometimes funny and a dark glimpse into the life he led. He leaves it all on the table and I admire his willingness to do so because it captivates you and it is hard to stop listening. I did so in three days! I chose to listen to him tell his own story, to be able to hear the nuances in his voice and to remember simpler times with he and his friends on a high school stage. As a mother, teacher, play director and human being I struggled with the myriad of emotions as his years in a world I knew nothing of unfolded in a profoundly honest, sometimes shocking way delivering a message that is so important. I'll admit that the book is not for the faint of heart and there are times that I ached for him, times I cried and times I simply shook my head longing for him to pull him away from the dangerous world he had fallen into. I smiled when he appeared to have found love and longed to know that he was happy with someone who truly appreciated him. At the end, I wept for the first time in years. The young man I first met, the seemingly happy-go-lucky extrovert has lived through so much more than any of us can conceive of and he now stands clean and confident in what lies ahead for him. Jason’s memoir leads the reader/listener down a path that is achingly vivid and brings us into his world, his tweaker world. Bravo to this remarkable man! This is a book that should be read, digested and thought about. How we look at others and the struggles they encounter are largely hidden from view. Who knows what any of us could have done to help prevent the hardships and difficulties. I applaud his amazing mother, brother and father for not stopping until he got the help he needed. They have so much to be proud of despite the obvious pain that they encountered. Jason tells us his story in great detail. It is sometimes very uncomfortable to hear, but it is his truth and I him being so vulnerable. The end provides the wrap up that I needed and as the tears rolled down my face my admiration for this fine human being grew even more. “Tweaker World” can be difficult to read, even more difficult to hear, but it is an important book that enlightens the reader.

One person found this helpful

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Marqui Jordan

An incredible journey through a world unknown to many!

Reviewed in the United States on March 30, 2023

Tweakerworld was an incredible dive into the terrifyingly fascinating world of drug use within the gay community. Jason recounts his experience as a drug user and dealer in the San Francisco Bay Area, befriending an interesting group of fellow "tweakers", parTying with a capital T, and hiding his secret drug fueled life from his family and lifelong friends. This story sheds light on what it is like to experience addiction, the dangers involved, and the triumph of making it out of the darkness.

A true must read! I recommend this book to anyone looking for a good story of redemption or looking to understand the difficulties of addiction.

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Greg Mania

A rollicking ride filled with heart and humor

Reviewed in the United States on March 14, 2023

i don't even know where to begin! to say i feel moved is beyond an understand; i feel catapulted, in the best way possible.

right off the bat, i'm beyond blown away by the author's storytelling skills. the mastery he has over tension- building it, releasing it, doing both at the same time! not to be crass, but it truly feels like literary edging. brava!

the other thing i love the most? how tender it is. and how that tenderness transcends the turbulence of that world. i think i might love this aspect of the book the most-that consistent heartbeat. i also see so much of myself in the author, and in many of the decisions he's made. i relate to so much, even though i've never been a part of that specific community. but i've loved people who were, and seeing how he took such good care of them with his words made my heart swell.

2 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

The Best!

Reviewed in the United States on March 19, 2023

Fast, funny, deep, dark, beautiful! A phenomenal book with such an important message. You don’t need to be part of the PnP world to understand or appreciate this book. Jason reveals the inner workings and delivers it a way that everyone can understand, perhaps even relate to at times. A must read!!

One person found this helpful

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Voracious Listener

I can't hit pause

Reviewed in the United States on March 7, 2023

This audiobook is so riveting, shocking, and (surprisingly) endearing that I haven't been able to stop listening. I feel like I've gotten a peak behind the curtain of a world I didn't know was 'walking among me'. I'm still midway through right now...and I need to find out how this tragically hilarious and hilariously tragic rollercoaster ends.

3 people found this helpful

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