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Undressing Infidelity: Why More Wives are Unfaithful Paperback – January 31, 2005

by Diane Shader Smith (Author)

23 customer reviews

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Undressing Infidelity is a fascinating, steamy and compelling book that takes you beyond the cold taboo statistics of divorce and infidelity and into the everyday lives of married women who are having extramarital affairs. Who are these women? They are your neighbours, your friends, your co-workers. They go to your gym. They shop at your supermarket. They are the women you see everyday who seem to have it all. So why are they cheating? Statistics tell us that 65 percent of married women cheat - but what does that really mean? Here the author has uncovered the truth behind the numbers by doing what no one has ever done before - listening to them. She sat down one to one with more than one hundred and fifty women, all of whom shared the intimate secrets of their affairs. What tempts women to cheat? And when they do, how do they keep their marriages intact? Or do they? What about the children? And even if no one finds out, how to they face themselves in the mirror in the morning? In this book the author not only reveals the fascinating results of her research, she also provides an up-close-and-personal look at the most telling stories she encountered. She takes you deep inside the marriages and affairs of 12 fascinating women who chose to cheat. Told in their own words, these stories weave a surprising and compelling tapestry of love, sex and cheating loyalties in today's marriages.

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Sidestepping statistics and sociological analysis in favor of good old-fashioned steamy storytelling, this book offers an insider's perspective on the phenomena of cheating wives. Smith reveals her personal fascination with the subject of female adultery in the opening chapter-a flirtatious relationship with a handsome man she met on a business trip once caused her to risk her comfortable marriage by almost starting an affair. Her cautionary tale reads like the opening of a romance novel, engrossing the reader with the daring of her flirtatious encounters. After her near affair, Smith began interviewing other women who had actually cheated in an attempt to figure out why women stray. These 14 absorbing stories are told through the wives' unique voices. Jennifer, a soccer mom with a bad sex life but a loving husband, found that her affair with a doctor actually raised her self-worth and helped her marriage. Theresa, a teacher in her 40s from the Midwest, with a "prim demeanor" and strict parents who never broached the subject of sex, cheated on her abusive husband with a cowboy she met at a bar. Smith admits that every person she interviewed challenged her assumptions about the type of woman who could be unfaithful, but unfortunately, she does not seem to have reached any more substantial conclusions than that. The book offers insufficient insight into how to prevent a good marriage from going sour, but what it lacks in social significance, it makes up for in intrigue and romance. Readers will be entertained by these real-life accounts of cheating wives, even if the overarching question of why women cheat is ultimately left unanswered.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Diane Shader Smith was a Director of Public Relations, working for such companies as Microsoft.

Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Adam Media Corp. (January 31, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 9781593374815
ISBN-13: 978-1593374815
ASIN: 159337481X
Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 7.5 inches
Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 23 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,850,229 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #2541 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Sociology > Marriage & Family
- #6331 in Books > Self-Help > Relationships > Interpersonal Relations
- #7411 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Marriage & Adult Relationships

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Joyful Shepherd

interesting stories but no real analysis

July 31, 2007

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

I am not sure whether I am more disappointed by the lack of analysis into why the women cheat, especially the ones where they said they loved their husbands and felt their husbands were trying to meet their needs, or the fact the author is so flippant about her own affair. It is good that she eventually told her husband, but the only thing she seemed to truly felt any remorse for was that her sister called her right before she consumated the affair sexually. She already did the emotional affair, but even in her own story, though she expresses relief about not taking that final step, it does not seem that she would not do it in the future or truly understood why she did it in the first place. I would like to see a book where not only the juicy details were shared, but also some analysis into the psychological and emotional aspects, even if there is no moral judgment made. Especially in light of the fact that many of these women acknolwedge that the affairs hurt their relationships with everyone. It seems to me that it would be helpful to explore that aspect of fantasy world meeting reality in deeper way.

5 people found this helpful6 people found this helpful

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Dr. Allen J. Amaro

MUST READ before getting married to that special woman!

August 1, 2017

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

I learned the "HARD WAY"... I would have been better prepared, for the very hard fall I experienced, if I had read this book before getting married the first time to a person I learned later had no moral fiber!..(she was a follower of Nietzsche philosophy) I should have known! Undressing Infidelity: Why More Wives are Unfaithful

One person found this helpful2 people found this helpful

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Trying2BeABetterPerson

Great book with cheating women confessions....

March 27, 2016

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

Wake of Neo the female narcissist matrix has you. This book is about women sharing their stories about their cheating on their husbands. Another good book with just wife cheating confessions is the kindle book Surviving My Infidelity and kindle eBook To Love, Honor, and Betray.. Anyway it was like hearing women in a private conversation about their affairs. I was amazed at how easy it was for the author to find women to share their affair stories as if there is NO SHAME at all in the female world in regards to having affairs. My goal was to try and find a way or method to pick women who will not cheat or at least to avoid women who will cheat. A couple of things that are common among all the women stories I've read in this book and the other women confession books I already recommended is that the women were all self centered, and once a cheater tend to cheat again and they did not know or read the bible because they had no understanding of God and none of the women felt any guilt. Many women admitted to having a great husband who was a great provider and a great father but yet they still cheated just for the excitement of it. See if the women were bible reading women who knew God, they would've had peace and happiness already but they felt empty inside even with all their success and their ideal family lifestyle and the affairs gave them a feeling inside. These married cheating women were often approached by a married cheating man and I believe the reason for this is the married cheating man hopes the cheating wife will not take the affair serious and send a anonymous caring friend letter to the wife of the cheating man in hopes of making the cheating man choose between his wife and the women he's cheating with since exposing the affair would mean she could loose her marriage as well. People who cheat are self centered narcissist who want it all. The family and spouse at home and the exciting carefree dating and sex with the affair You hear that men are only as loyal as their options but I think that applies more to women. Think about it. Out of all the marriages you know...How many of those marriages would you be willing to bet a million dollars that the wife would stay married to the husband if she won the lottery and no longer needed her husbands income or if the husband suddenly had a health problem and he didn't make the money he used to. What happened to.... for richer or poorer.....and sickness or health. And I dont know why people are giving this book bad reviews because the author didn't give a conclusion. Can people not think on their own anymore and draw their own conclusions. In fact Ive learned more in analyzing confessions of different cheating women than reading a book called Tempted Women which was a book by a biased women expert who gives her own biased opinion of why the women she interviewed cheated. And none of these cheating women books dare say that the cheating women are narcissist but I see it as the big white elephant in the room.

One person found this helpful

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The Realist

Undressing Infidelity - Not

April 22, 2011

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

I was looking for more of an analytical approach to infidelity. This book was based on anecdotal evidence. Women gossiping about their sexual indiscretions. Written in the style of a cheap erotica I feel this book will attract a more feminine audience. I was hoping for the author to dissect each interview in an anthropological fashion. This book has nothing to do with with undressing infidelity. Making a book out of interviews with no research or commentaries makes it hard to believe the author put any effort into writing this book. This book belongs in the soft erotica section at best.

2 people found this helpful3 people found this helpful

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Flash G

Great insight.

November 10, 2012

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

This book helped me understand that women are a lot more stealthy than men give credit. A wife can be unfaithful even if she has a great husband, boredom is enough reason. And oftentimes the husband has not a single clue great book.

One person found this helpful2 people found this helpful

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concerned reader

Men, getting married? Then read this!

January 17, 2010

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

Men, if you're getting married, you'll want to read this! (No lie, it's scarier than anything written by Stephen King.) You'll want to have a pre-nup, separate finances and paternity testing lined-up before you say "I do." Why? Because, nowadays, she'll likely get bored with the security and be unfulfilled, cheat on you to feel alive, and develop feelings for the other guy then dump you. And then him too for someone else. Marriage never was constant "romance" forever (passion and fluttery feelings like the first time do wear off), but today everyone expects all "highs" forever and dissatified trouble abounds when that doesn't happen. Be prepared!

6 people found this helpful7 people found this helpful

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jerseyghostgrl

heart felt

July 27, 2015

Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

wow an amazing book... woman who tell the truth about their marriages.

2 people found this helpful3 people found this helpful

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