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Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships Hardcover – January 3, 2012

4.7 out of 5 stars 70 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“Wabi Sabi Love is uplifting and full of the truth about what it takes to keep love alive.” (Christiane Northrup, M.D., ob/gyn physician and author of New York Times bestseller Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom)

“Arielle Ford’s Wabi Sabi Love weds ancient wisdom and modern concerns to create the formula for a sustainable, loving relationship for years to come.” (Deepak Chopra)

“My sister, Arielle, is a master of everlasting love. With this foolproof guide to sustaining relationships beyond ‘I do,’ she shares her hard-won wisdom of keeping love alive and thriving! Wabi Sabi Love is a must read for every couple in search of a happily ever after.” (Debbie Ford, New York Times Bestselling author of The 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse)

“Wabi Sabi Love really works. My husband and I follow Arielle’s wisdom and enjoy a deeply meaningful, totally fulfilling and loving marriage.” (Peggy McColl , Author of New York Times bestseller Your Destiny Switch)

“Wabi Sabi Love shows you how to have a completely fulfilling love relationship. Arielle is a master teacher in guiding others to create deep and lasting love. Listen to her, follow her sage advice, and you’ll experience relationship bliss.” (Marci Shimoff, Author of New York Times bestseller Love For No Reason)

This book is a treasure trove of inspiration that offers an abundance of great ideas and information. I highly recommend it. (Gay Hendricks)

“This book is a revelation. With the Wabi Sabi mind-shift, your relationship will change forever, and you’ll discover that the love, acceptance, and passion you’d always hoped for was there all along. This truly is a portrait of how to develop love that lasts a lifetime.” (Jack Canfield, Co-author of The Success Principles)

“It’s a worthwhile read for anyone in a relationship.” (Library Journal)

“The stories Ford uses to illustrate the Wabi Sabi principles, both from her own relationship and those of other couples, will make you laugh and nod your head and decide to give the ideas a try.” (Retailing Insight)

“Arielle Ford’s Wabi Sabi Love is a compassionate and inspired guide to creating more loving relationships. It’s a book I plan to read again and again, and keep close by for a long time!” (Gloria Loring, singer, actress and author, Coincidence Is God's way of Remaining Anonymous)

From the Back Cover

Love. It’s right up there with air, food, and water as the most necessary of ingredients for existence. And yet it is one of the hardest things to find, and perhaps an even harder thing to hold on to.

The truth is you’re not perfect, and neither is your partner. But you can be perfectly imperfect together. In Wabi Sabi Love, international bestselling author and relationship expert Arielle Ford applies the wisdom of Wabi Sabi—the ancient Japanese idea of illuminating the beauty in imperfection—to love relationships. Wabi Sabi Love is the practice of exploring, embracing, and cherishing the quirks, irritations, and limitations that make you and your partner unique and that form your shared history as a couple.

Wabi Sabi Love provides the tools to see yourself, your partner, and your partnership in an entirely new light, develop a deep and profound appreciation for each other, and experience more balance, harmony, and joy in your relationship than ever before. Wabi Sabi Love teaches you to:

  • turn conflict into connection and differences into mutual passions
  • move from “annoyed” to “enjoyed”
  • establish new beliefs and habits that better serve your relationship
  • cultivate humor, humility, and generosity to diffuse those moments when you would normally retreat or slip into tired judgments, criticisms, or resentments

Using real-life stories of couples who applied Wabi Sabi and found their relationships transformed, Wabi Sabi Love can revolutionize your relationship whether you’re navigating financial challenges, raising children, caring for aging parents, coping with a seemingly insurmountable betrayal, or just facing mundane frustrations and everyday stressors. By shifting the focus from what’s wrong to what’s right, Wabi Sabi Love reveals a pathway to true love and your happily ever after.

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 256 pages
  • Publisher: HarperElixir (January 3, 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0062003755
  • ISBN-13: 978-0062003751
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.9 x 7.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (70 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #999,636 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This is a much-needed book for people who have good relationships that they're eager to make even better. Here are some reasons why I like this book:
* It takes an unflinching look at the 'imperfections' in your partner (and yourself) and how you can learn to embrace them. This is not about the fairy-tale happily-ever-after, folks. It's about the day after Cinderella goes off into the sunset with Prince Charming when that surprise thing called reality hits 'em.
* It has a healthy dose of applied Eastern wisdom and Western science, including the work of John Gottman (who does the best science on what makes relationships work). I have a soft spot for ancient wisdom + modern science, so two thumbs up to that.
* It uses real-world case studies, most liberally from Arielle's own relationship and those of her friends. Arielle couldn't stand sports, and she married a jock who worshipped at the altar of basketball. How did she cope? She'll tell ya how she learned to LOVE basketball -- and it just may work for your situation, too.
* It's for both men AND women. Guys -- can't deal with having to go shopping with your woman? (I can hear the collective uuuunnngh in the background). She recounts how other guys spun that lead into gold by putting that dead time into very creative (and effective) use.
* It has real-world, practical techniques that totally work. The Heart Lock-In Technique alone may be worth the admission price -- and that's just Chapter 1.
* It's written by Arielle Ford. I firmly believe that you should learn from people who practice what they preach, and Arielle is the embodiment of her teachings.
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Format: Hardcover
My husband's most annoying character traits hold the secret to falling back in love with him? It took a bit of willingness on my part (luckily, I was willing), but the results have been unbelievable. I was on the verge of having an affair when a friend gave me this book. Now I feel like I'm having one with my own husband. I literally look at him through different eyes. I'm not sure if his behavior has improved or I'm just seeing him differently, and quite honestly, I don't care. I had never heard of "Wabi Sabi" or anything like it before. This concept, this book, is genuis. And in case you're wondering, it's not just a bunch of theory. Throughout the book are plenty of examples of couples who pitted themselves against "that one character flaw" in their partner, and ended up using it to create a closer, more passionate relationship. 10 stars.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
*****
Wabi Sabi Love is like a breath of fresh air for your marriage. It's a different kind of relationship book, one that is light and a very entertaining read yet at the same time profound. One of the author's previous books focuses on attracting an intimate partner; this one focuses on how to maintain the love once you have found it. It doesn't have all of the standard "marriage advice" but approaches committed relationships from a different perspective--that of imperfection.

The basic idea behind Wabi Sabi Love is that by embracing imperfection (from the Japanese term "wabi sabi") you can enhance your marriage. It sounds paradoxical, and so it is. But this book shows you how it is done, primarily via anecdotal stores of couples who have successfully accomplished this. The stories will each have aspects you can relate to and apply to your own relationship. At the end of the book, the author lists details about who the people are, and I was surprised that many of them are well known personalities who revealed much about their own marriages in order to inspire and help others. I think that the people who shared their stories were brave to admit their vulnerabilities and to share intimate details about how they overcame their problems and embraced the imperfection in each other.

The stories are followed with exercises that are light and fun, many of which can be done with your partner. They can also be saved for later and enjoyed, and the book just be read straight on through.

I found this book to be very inspirational in turning my attitude around to being one of love and gratitude for the very things that irritated me about my husband.
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Format: Hardcover
In the past I have written blogs on the subject of Wabi Sabi. This strange-to-Western-ears
term comes from a Japanese aesthetic philosophy that deals with the concept of impermanence
and imperfection, and its relationship to the qualities/values of beauty or desirability.

The current Western world/society has certain standards relating to beauty. In truth, much
of this beauty perspective has a lot to do with `glamor', and nothing of substance pertaining to
an actual experience of viewed or encountered beauty.

Wabi Sabi has always appealed to me since my first discovery of its charming, serene-based
reflective principles. What some classify as "ravages of time" upon a person or object, those with
a more astute grasp of attractiveness appeal and loveliness, see time-composed imperfections as
a desirable maturing process that illuminates uniqueness and character. In some instances, the
attraction of natural or simple design.

We see Wabi Sabi in everyday life when we come upon a beautiful piece of weathered wood,
or admire a fountain or statue that has succumbed to the elements, creating a wonderful patina
of originality. The quality is found too in people we love - that favorite grandmother whose
care, kindness and affection makes her the most beautiful person in the world. Our mates hold
the "impermanence factor" as well, as time fades one attraction, and creates another feature facet
as fascinating as the previous. When the physical transition is subjective to our adoration and
love, the faults/imperfections, minute or vast, become an exquisitely sculpted appreciation that
wears and shows the character and warmth of their heart.
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