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What Women Want Men to Know Mass Market Paperback – January 1, 1900
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From Publishers Weekly
Like John Gray, relationship expert and motivational speaker DeAngelis (Are You the One for Me?, etc.) highlights recognizable distinctions between the needs and communicating styles of men and women. Based upon the experiences of "tens of thousands of people" and women's responses to a questionnaire, her latest work aspires to offer "simple, practical ways to communicate and make both (sexes) happier." Though arguably bordering on stereotype, her easily digestible truths (women put love first, are creators, have a sacred relationships with time) can help both sexes gain perspective. But treacly writing (e.g., "no beauty treatment... outfit... jewels... can make a woman look as radiant as when she is feeling loved") and heavy-handed admonitions (e.g., to read the book "from start to finish") detract from more helpful observations. However, restraint is not DeAngelis's trademark, nor what fans expect. Though the focus is on interpreting women's behavior (e.g., viewing being "too emotional" as "in touch with feelings"), men's behavior doesn't seem to merit the same consideration. For example, she lists the top-10 male habits that drive women crazy (vagueness, emotional withdrawal, lying to avoid unpleasantness, bossing women around) without further elucidation. Perhaps DeAngelis is saving the interpretations for the sequel, but it's a shame to turn off men who may benefit from her genuine insights in, for example, the small but provocative section on sex. (Aug.)Forecast: Women will flock to this, as they have to her other bestsellers, but the intended male audience may prove difficult to capture.
Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.--This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
From Library Journal
DeAngelis (Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know) here writes for both men and women, aiming to help men understand the women in their lives and to help women understand themselves more clearly. She divides her book into three sections: what women want men to know about them, about love, intimacy, and communication, and about sexual turnoffs and turnons. The material comes from DeAngelis's 25 years of counseling, events in her own life and the lives of her friends, and a questionnaire she sent to hundreds of women. DeAngelis has a frank, to-the-point style, but she is neither profane nor voyeuristic. She hopes that a woman could hand this book to her companion and say "Read this and you will understand me" and it is just that sort of book. It delivers what it promises, is compelling reading, and is easy to grasp, with boxed hints and the use of both boldface and italics to help readers separate her ideas. Her concepts of the "dove pie" and "Love House" are worthy of the price of the book. Great talk-show material, this will be popular in public libraries. Susan E. Burdick, MLS, Reading, PA
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
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Top Customer Reviews
If I could recommend just one book to men all over the world it would be "What Women Want Men To Know." This is such a powerful book as it fully describes everything a woman wishes her partner knew. And for men who read this book and put it into practice - the result is going to be a woman who feels like a goddess of love. This type of woman wants sex more frequently. That reality alone should have men anxious to read the contents of this book.
Many men who read this book probably already think that women are needy and are obsessed with their relationships. I will admit that for part of this book I did feel that maybe the author was making excuses for some women who blame their bitchy attitude on the way men treat them. I think a spiritually mature woman would not act in ways this book describes. But on the other hand if a man is provoking the worst in a woman then this book will help him see the light. He may in fact have total control over how a woman reacts. Like the author explains that a woman who acts jealous all the time may in fact just be overcome with the notion that she has to protect her relationship. I also think that some women are not very trusting and can become jealous more easily. Sometimes women ruin a good thing with a man by being overly emotional and not mature.
As a woman reading this you may feel discouraged (How is my guy going to remember all this?) or encouraged (Wow, Now my man will really understand me!). The trick really is going to be to make a man interested enough in the book to want to read it. The author gives some tips in the book so I suggest that as a woman you read it first. But if you are a man reading this review just know that the chapter on sex is worth the price of the book.
So if you are a man thinking why can't a woman be more like a man or a woman thinking why can't a man be more like a woman know that you are probably both just wishing for an easier time. And relationships are work. I think to be successful in a long-term relationship you have to adapt and grow. Women may need to become a little less emotional and men may need to become a better communicator. A woman who cries all the time and is angry is not going to be attractive. A man who clams up and can't have an intellectual conversation is soon going to become boring and unattractive. A lot of this book deals with these types of issue.
So I'd recommend this book to men and women who are serious about their relationship, are willing to read this book more than a few times and really want to put the information in this book into practice. As a woman I felt I understood myself more so I can also recommend this to women. But this book is really for men who want to take loving to a whole other level. Another title for this book might be: "How to Become the Best Lover in the World." Because really everything this book is really teaching is emotional foreplay. You make a woman happy outside the bedroom and she is going to start making you happy inside the bedroom. That this book guarantees!
~The Rebecca Review
We began reading together.. in bed... over the phone.. whenever a great passage would come up. He was really taken w this book. So, I began thumbing thru it and I just didn't identify with a lot of the descriptions and situations. I suppose I just feel like I'm different from many women because I was raised with brothers only-- and I also didn't think that my boyfriend would get much out of this book. However, we recently purchased it from Amazon (still waiting for it to arrive) after he finished it. He said he wanted to be able to reference it and refresh his memory from time to time. He said the "3 things that women need" really helped him to understand how important it is for women to feel safe. I had to agree w that. I ALWAYS want to feel safe... whether it is where I live... where I park my car or within my relationship. So-- I thought-- score one point for Beverly. The next thing he talked about was filling the "love bank" and now he's always talking about how important it is to keep "my" love bank filled... (it feels so silly saying this)... The Caveman references made me bristle-- I just didn't like it or relate... but, he said it spoke to him... helped him to understand a woman's cellular need to feel "safe"!
The bottom line is this.. when he read the negative reviews from men, he started shaking his head. He said that he prob would have felt the same way, if he would not have approached the book with an open heart and a desire to "make right" our relationship. He said the book taught him some things he never understood about women. This I know... he has been a better partner to me... I credit the reading he's been doing. He is currently reading the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by Gottman-- he bought it-- even though he felt it was geared more for "married" couples/ I just started the Five Love Languages by Chapman.. it captures your attention from the get go!
One last thought... my co-workers watched my boyfriend reading it when he would come see me for my lunch breaks... they've all noted a change in him. One co-worker asked me for the name of the book. I'd say that speaks for itself.
Men... I know it is sometimes tough to read a book that is focused on what YOU should do, (I feel the same way.. smiles) instead of what "she" needs to do... but, if you have a good woman (or want a good relationship), it is worth trying to focus on what you, personally, have power over... and that is always and only ourselves. Perhaps, your partner will respond in kind... and do what I'm doing.. reading book alongside my partner. He has inspired me to do so. Maybe there isn't a book out there that can transform "your" life... but, it is sometimes the small things that do, indeed, have power... even one passage, or one chapter may give you some wisdom that can help to alter your life.