![]({"https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/413SxM6DcOL._SX302_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg":[304,499],"https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/413SxM6DcOL._SY344_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg":[211,346]})
I'll start by saying, I will not sugar-coat this review. This book contains some great techniques for dealing with people who aggressively try to manipulate you. That being said, the book is SO incredibly outdated in its voice and approach that I found it difficult to read it without its context being ironic. For me, the voice of the book overshadows its intent and helpfulness, but doesn't change the fact that I did benefit from reading it.
THE GOOD:
The examples used in the book are lengthy and repetitive. This is good because the redundancy of it programmed my mind to look for examples of those instances in my own life where I could apply the concepts of the book. A light bulb began going off in my mind when I'd experience an opportunity to try out one of the techniques described in the book. Over time, it has helped change my attitude and approach toward aggressive and manipulative people.
The book gives concrete techniques for applying in your everyday conversations: BROKEN RECORD, FOGGING, FREE INFORMATION, NEGATIVE ASSERTION, WORKABLE COMPROMISE, NEGATIVE INQUIRY. I began using them, and they do work! I occasionally go back and re-read chapters because it does take practice... but eventually it becomes more second nature and your confidence level builds as a result.
THE NOT-SO-GOOD
It is painfully obvious that this book was written in the 70s, with the male author using phraseology and examples that are misogynistic, self-congratulatory, racially charged, patriarchal, and bigoted. In a way, it is good to see how far we have come since the Civil Rights movement, but I really wish someone would publish an updated edition of this text that uses relevant, objective examples that do not detract from the overall purpose of the text. Personally, found it very annoying to waste so much time prodding through excessive ego-driven banter to find the nuggets of useful information. I wouldn't have kept going if the nuggets hadn't been so needed and useful. If you want an example, just look at the so-called Table of Contents. It's more like a glossary or appendix that provides a cluttered description of every chapter rather than just a simple chapter name and page number. I can take my own notes, thank you... and I prefer the appendix to be at the end of the book.
Fun fact: The author mentions sex so much in the book that I actually began playing a game to see if I could read through more than two pages with out seeing a reference to sex. The answer is no.
If you can tolerate the author's voice long enough to get through this book, it is admittedly very useful.
- Mass Market Paperback: 352 pages
- Publisher: Bantam; Reissue edition (February 1, 1975)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0553263900
- ISBN-13: 978-0553263909
- Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 1 x 6.9 inches
- Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 286 customer reviews
-
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#29,985 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #221 in Communication & Social Skills
- #338 in Self-Esteem
- #1202 in Motivational Self-Help (Books)
Would you like to tell us about a lower price?
If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support?
If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support?
