- Mass Market Paperback: 352 pages
- Publisher: Bantam; Reissue edition (February 1, 1975)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0553263900
- ISBN-13: 978-0553263909
- Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 1 x 6.9 inches
- Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 279 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #12,646 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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When I Say No, I Feel Guilty Mass Market Paperback – January 1, 1985
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From the Publisher
The best-seller that helps you say: "I just said 'no' and I don't feel guilty!" Are you letting your kids get away with murder? Are you allowing your mother-in-law to impose her will on you? Are you embarrassed by praise or crushed by criticism? Are you having trouble coping with people? Learn the answers in When I Say No, I Feel Guilty, the best-seller with revolutionary new techniques for getting your own way.
From the Inside Flap
The best-seller that helps you say: "I just said 'no' and I don't feel guilty!" Are you letting your kids get away with murder? Are you allowing your mother-in-law to impose her will on you? Are you embarrassed by praise or crushed by criticism? Are you having trouble coping with people? Learn the answers in "When I Say No, I Feel Guilty, the best-seller with revolutionary new techniques for getting your own way.
Top customer reviews
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The examples used in the book are lengthy and repetitive. This is good because the redundancy of it programmed my mind to look for examples of those instances in my own life where I could apply the concepts of the book. A light bulb began going off in my mind when I'd experience an opportunity to try out one of the techniques described in the book. Over time, it has helped change my attitude and approach toward aggressive and manipulative people.
The book gives concrete techniques for applying in your everyday conversations: BROKEN RECORD, FOGGING, FREE INFORMATION, NEGATIVE ASSERTION, WORKABLE COMPROMISE, NEGATIVE INQUIRY. I began using them, and they do work! I occasionally go back and re-read chapters because it does take practice... but eventually it becomes more second nature and your confidence level builds as a result.
It is painfully obvious that this book was written in the 70s, with the male author using phraseology and examples that are misogynistic, self-congratulatory, racially charged, patriarchal, and bigoted. In a way, it is good to see how far we have come since the Civil Rights movement, but I really wish someone would publish an updated edition of this text that uses relevant, objective examples that do not detract from the overall purpose of the text. Personally, found it very annoying to waste so much time prodding through excessive ego-driven banter to find the nuggets of useful information. I wouldn't have kept going if the nuggets hadn't been so needed and useful. If you want an example, just look at the so-called Table of Contents. It's more like a glossary or appendix that provides a cluttered description of every chapter rather than just a simple chapter name and page number. I can take my own notes, thank you... and I prefer the appendix to be at the end of the book.
Fun fact: The author mentions sex so much in the book that I actually began playing a game to see if I could read through more than two pages with out seeing a reference to sex. The answer is no.
If you can tolerate the author's voice long enough to get through this book, it is admittedly very useful.