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When You Eat at the Refrigerator, Pull Up a Chair: 50 Ways to Feel Thin, Gorgeous, and Happy (When You Feel Anything But) Paperback – September 15, 1999
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Roth's advice is simple, but often beyond the realm of thinking of someone obsessed with calorie counting. She recommends that you eat at least one hot meal every day, as a slice of hot pizza will make you feel more full than a cold and cardboardy one will; that you should do one "exquisitely kind" thing for yourself every day, be it buying new underwear or taking a sledgehammer to your scale; and that you should "separate the desire to be thin from the desire to be cherished." She also gives straight diet advice that can't be found in publications along the lines of Cosmo: "Too much fat makes you fat. But too little makes you fat, too, because you usually make up for eating nonfat foods by eating twice as much. I suggest you allow yourself to eat enough fat to feel full. Part of the reason that many of us feel as if we could start eating at one end of our kitchens and chomp our way clear across the United States is that we never give ourselves permission to feel full without feeling guilty, to eat enough fat when it's not on a binge." Amen. --Erica Jorgensen --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Top Customer Reviews
But if it hadn't been a slender volume with a sense of humor, I would have resisted the messages it contains.
This book helped me begin to find answers to these questions:
Why can't I stick to a diet, since being thin is what I want most?
Why do I always come last in my family hierarchy of need (that, incidentally, I'm in control of, hello)?
Am I just doomed to remain fat because of my genes, or my unhappiness? Both?
What's the relationship between self-esteem and my weight?
What does being thin represent to me?
On the strength of this book, I attended a Roth seminar, and that experience is speeding me along, with insights and growth coming thick and fast.
So, if you're ready for something newer and deeper than the latest tips and tricks, or another set of rules, but not quite sold on your own ability to make *anything* work - give this a try. It might be just what you need now.
My one criticism, and maybe Ms. Roth will correct this in future printings, is the Table of Contents. This book is supposed to be 'a take along' to be read in bits and pieces as time allows and mood suggests. But when you want to find a nugget, the Table of Contents is a hindrance, not a help. I'm just a reader, not a book editor but below is an excerpt from the current layout and a recommended, improved Table of Contents:
4.Give Away Clothes that Cut Off Your
Circulation/22 5.Consider Howard Stern and
Live 'As If'/26 6. Learn to Recognize a
Fat-and-Ugly Attack/29 7. Emergency . . .
4.Give Away Clothes that Cut Off Your Circulation___22
5.Consider Howard Stern and Live 'As If'__________26
6.Learn to Recognize a Fat-and-Ugly Attack________29
Having read "Feeding the Hungry Heart" about 10 years ago, I can say that she has outdone herself. Her experiences in the last 10 years are explored and expressed firmly, simply and confidently in these pages. Read it, then read it again to be sure and highlight the parts that hit you like a brick in the head.
Yeah, a brick in the head would most likely hurt, and so might some of what she has to say, but that only means that she is hitting a place inside that you have been unwilling to explore because it IS painful. Let these insights shine into your dark corners, clear your mind, set free your heart and soul so you can soar like the eagle that you are.
"Being kind to yourself is the only solution," she says. "Think self-kindness, not self indulgence." We berate and punish ourselves for not being who we think we could or should be, and that self-loathing compounds and turns into fanatical dieting, then bingeing, or fanatical exercise and starvation. And all the defeating, humiliating, exhausting cycles in between. And where do we end up? Always in the same place. Feeling fat which equals unloved, unworthy, unbelievably depressed and out of control.
Would we let our friends get away with calling us those things? Then why do we tolerate it from ourselves?
All you really need to do is be kind to yourself, and your SELF will return the favor.
May not make sense right now. But read the book. Internalize it. Live it. Then you will see. Again, thanks Geneen, for giving me permission to treat myself the way I deserve to be treated.