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Why I Didn't Rebel: A Twenty-Two-Year-Old Explains Why She Stayed on the Straight and Narrow---and How Your Kids Can Too Paperback – October 3, 2017
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About the Author
Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach is a writer, blogger, and psychology graduate from Ottawa, Canada. The daughter of blogger and author Sheila Wray Gregoire, Lindenbach is an online entrepreneur passionate about challenging common patterns of Christian thought.
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I read this because a popular blogger I follow and respect posted this book on Instagram claiming that it was the best parenting book ever and every parent needed to read it. As a parent, I would caution anyone from believing that this is a fool-proof way of making sure you don't have rebellious children. Yes, it's clear that raising your kids the way the author describes is the best way, however, it ignores the fact that children are children and parenting them is not a clear cut formula. There are many families who were raised and cultivated in the ways she describes as leading to having non-rebellious children, whose children end up all over the map. Not to mention, it totally puts God in a box.
I would possibly recommend this to a new parent friend, with a little disclaimer. I'd love to see an updated version when this young lady has a little more life experience and possibly a couple of kids so she can give actual parenting advice.
The author writes from her reflections on her childhood/teen years and additionally points out themes and patterns through various stories and anecdotes of peers who either landed on the straight and narrow or in rebellion. As one who also "didn't rebel", I can fully attest to the observations she makes and the conclusions she arrives at. I too was not perfect, fought with my sister a lot, was moody and frustrated... but I never rebelled and now am closer than ever with my parents. I give the glory to God but the credit goes to the wisdom of my parents. Now, as someone who has served in youth ministry for 7 years, I wish I could get every parent to read this book. I have spent a lot of time with weepy parents mourning the state of their teens - so often I wonder how much could be prevented if the common pitfalls outlined in this book were avoided. Highly recommend - not as an earth-shattering literary work or holistic guide to parenting, but as a helpful tool in your belt from the kid perspective.
She emphasized that authenticity matters more than strict authority, which accords both with my observations of friends in their family life and with my immediate family. The insights I found most important were that parents can have high expectations for their kids while also providing encouragement, instead of pressure, and that children can learn that Holy Spirit is with them, too.
The book is well-organized and also contains references to research studies and interviews with psychology professionals in addition to personal accounts from various young adults on their family life. My favorite part of the book, though, was Rebecca’s voice, and how she was funny, bold, and truthful all at the same time.
I think this book will be useful to parents who want to learn how to have the best relationship they can with their kids—and to inspire them not to parent out of fear or a desire to control, but to rely on God to raise their kids in love and confidence.
all kids don’t...rebelling is common but not normal, it is not a “right of passage”. This book also challenged me to examine my level of faith in God’s ability grow and mature my kids, rather than my own. There were so many little nuggets of gold in this book. I think every parent should read it. Even though this book is geared towards teenage rebellion, it’s beneficial to read it BEFORE your kids become teens so that you can plan ahead . Loved it, loved it, loved it!!!