- Paperback: 242 pages
- Publisher: New Rise Press (October 26, 2012)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0988443120
- ISBN-13: 978-0988443129
- Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.6 x 9 inches
- Shipping Weight: 15 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 113 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #45,190 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Why Do I Do That?: Psychological Defense Mechanisms and the Hidden Ways They Shape Our Lives Paperback – October 26, 2012
"Maybe You Should Talk to Someone" by Lori Gottlieb
"This is a daring, delightful, and transformative book." ―Arianna Huffington, Founder, Huffington Post Learn more
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"This thought-provoking book explores the psychological defense mechanisms Burgo believes all people harbor. In a congenial tone, the author reiterates that human emotions and their associated defenses [are a] part of everyday life. Exercises at the end of chapters apply techniques for recognizing and defusing oppressive defenses in readers' own lives and bring the book down to a personal level, creating a valuable resource for readers."
About the Author
Joseph Burgo, Ph.D. has practiced psychotherapy for more than 30 years, holding licenses as a marriage and family therapist and clinical psychologist. He earned his undergraduate degree at UCLA and his masters and doctorate at California Graduate Institute in Los Angeles. He is also a graduate psychoanalyst and has served as a board member, officer and instructor at a component society of the International Psychoanalytic Association. He currently writes the popular blog "After Psychotherapy" where he discusses personal growth issues from a psychodynamic perspective.
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This book is aimed at individuals who wish to understand themselves better, but buried inside this topic is the all-important explanation as to why ordinary people with good intentions behave badly, en masse, whilst justifying it to themselves or hiding it from themselves. There are no evil people in this world, there are only people with highly-evolved defence mechanisms. The sooner this is brought to centre stage, the sooner we can change the painful cycle of history.
Having said that, the book is well-written and easy to read and I encourage the author, and everyone else, to continue spreading the message.
Most books on these subjects tend to fall into the "cheer you up" or the "simple directed solutions" categories, but this one does not. It IS less tempting, since it won't promise to solve your problems, and even if it does solve them, it will be through your efforts more than the book information.
So why should I buy it? I think the first fundamental step into better coping with psychological "problems" is to open yourself to them. You may resist it, but this books helps you acknowledge them without putting you down (overwhelming you) on the process. You may be familiar with that feeling after a long sleepness night in which nothing happened outside your own mind, but still, you feel a little different, after hours of hard and painful effort trying to understand what has been going on. And you feel tired, and you feel emotionally drained, but still, it seems you've come to something. It is at the same time a "forgiving" and a "maybe I can't do everything, but I can do something" feeling.
For me, it's what this book is about, and I'll recommend it for friends and loved ones.