As a survivor of emotional abuse, I can respect JJ’s strength to finally leave a relationship with a man who clearly was/is a sociopath. She provided a lot of details about how she stuck around with this man that was dogging her out and admitting to it every time. I won’t lie, I almost put the book down at one point out of frustration from how she stayed with a man who very openly dogged her by cheating on her and telling her. However, I’m glad I stuck through it, because she did finally get the courage to leave.
My reason for not giving this book 5 stars was due to all of the grammatical errors. Otherwise, I’m glad that she shared her story and pray that it blesses someone to know that if she could leave, they can leave as well.
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![Without Bruises by [Jillian Simmons]](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/41Mn3SRsnML._SY346_.jpg)
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It's all stars with the relationship ou had or not with your parents
Reviewed in the United States on November 7, 2016
After the official release of "Without bruises" by Ms. Jillian Simmons, I saw that Taraji P. Henson was also releasing a book on being a victim of domestic violence, I couldn't help wondering what is going on in Black America relationship? Why only black women keep talking about the plight of domestic violence they endured because it touches all kind of people regardless of their background. From the very wealthy to the broke ass ones, but most Black public figures talk about it.* The other communities:, I have white female friends from different all social backgrounds whose reasons to go with non-white men was because they felt protected and loved. Many Caucasians women I have as a friend, were also victims of domestic violence but they simply never reported it and quit their relationship or marriage with what they called a settlement from their domestic partner.* The East-Indians exampleI had a conversation with an east Indians couple. We had this conversation on domestic violence and it's prevalence. The guy told me, in front of his wife: I can beat my wife every day if I want to and she will never call the police on me. What we usually do in our community, is that we call the elders and we meet as a group to fix the issue without our community without having the police or justice involved. The wife, who was an educated and independent women, was supporting her husband on his statement. Not saying violence in the couple is ok but to find solutions within the community before getting the justice and police involved.* A systemic issueWhy some women stay in an abusive relationship sometimes? Based on my conversation with some females friends and I purposely conduct that conversation with some from Europe, the USA and some from South Africa, the ones who were comfortable told me that the reason they stayed in the abusive relationship were for the following:- the lifestyle the man was offering- the house they don't think they can either afford by themselves-... and the majority admitted that: the sex was too good and they were afraid not being able to experience it again... very weird reasons to stay right?I am sure you are wondering where I am going with all these examples, well after reading the introduction and the relationship the author described having with her mother, I already understood why she ended up experiencing some sorts of abuse.Most things we experienced in our romantic relationships are linked with the relationship we had or not with our parents.What I like most about the author writing is how highly she spoke about her relationship with her father . That made me praise the author even more.* A blueprint for love expressionWe also have to recognize that some/many black women don't have a good blueprint of what a loving relationship is because many of them grew up in a violent environment, and this is systemic when I look at a situation from an international perspective.My time spent in the US and talking with ladies, in my situation mostly black ladies, at least 65% of them had experienced rape or molestation before their turn 15. When it comes to black men, at least 30% experienced rape too from either women or men...and sadly it often comes from someone from their families or close surrounding.In conclusion, Without Bruises is an important read and must lead to more talks nationwide on how to spot signs that you are in a domestic abuse situation and teach the youth to never hide what they experience with their partner and very quickly to quit.. because the true expression of love is not to keep your lover prisoner of your whims and insecurities.Let's share our reviews so we can hear from other readers as well. Best.
Reviewed in the United States on November 7, 2016
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