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The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family Paperback – October 1, 2002
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"You will recognize the narcissistic personality disorder so well described by Payson as an all too common affliction among those who wield great political and corporate power in contemporary society. This book is a useful guide to recognizing and confronting the reality, which is a first step toward nullifying the power and influence of the afflicted over our lives." David C. Korten, Ph.D. author of The Great Turning: From Empire to Earth Community and When Corporations Rule the World --David C. Korten, Ph.D. author of The Great Turning: From Empire to Earth Community and When Corporations Rule the World
About the Author
Top Customer Reviews
Mrs. Payson's language is clear, warm-hearted, and exact. She uses examples based on experiences of clients from her practice. All in all, I highly recommend this book to those who suffer from narcissistic co-dependence and those who know someone who does.
1. They are never EVER wrong.
2. They never admit to anything.
3. Nothing is ever a great idea unless it comes from them.
4. You will never get any credit for what you do. Ever.
5. They don't seem to know or care how what they say might impact you.
6. You get hopelessly entangled in their arguments, and it never leads to a resolution.
7. Emotion = Weakness.
And on and on it goes. The closer you get to them, the worse it becomes. Every chapter sent me reeling as all these behaviors are discussed. Probably half the book is highlighted in yellow and I read it twice. It was like this book was written about her. It also helped me confront my part in the whole thing as well.
READ THIS BOOK if you suspect a significant other or parent has these tendencies listed above. If so, this book will blow you away. I wish I had this knowledge DURING the relationship and not after I ended it. Understanding the dynamic has brought me some closure and the wisdom of avoiding anything like it again. The sad (and most painful) part is that the only healthy thing you can do is leave. You cannot help them. You cannot heal them. You will not change them.
She reveals why these "charming" creatures suck you in.....project their behaviors on to you, exploit you, demoralize you, then leave. Reading this book will restore your sanity.
--They are extrordinarily inteligent,charming, manipulative, and "successful."
--Believe they are superior and above reproach.
--Are totally incapable of intimacy,but come across as attentive and sensual.
--Are self-absorbed and completely incapable of empathy.
--Have grandiose ideas and an unquenchable need for recognition and admiration.
--Cannot apologize or be accountable because to admit mistakes would suggest that they are imperfect.
--Have secret lives: addictions, affairs, perversions, and fetishes.
--Have at least two distinctly different personalities and corresponding mood disorders.
--Play mind games,and call you crazy when you react.
--They are emotionally and financially exploitve; when your money is gone, they are gone.
--Once they break you down, they detest you.
--Have a strong need to associate with others whom they perceive to be powerful, wealthy, prominent, or otherwise "special."
--Will replace you before they leave you. Cannot be alone.
--Will circle you like a vulture, find your weak spot, and attack.
If understanding is affirmation, Payson opens the door to healing and the subsequent recapture of the energy and vitaity that defined you before he/she entered your life.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This book is concise and easy to read. Helpful for mental health professional to use as a tool for clients who deal with loved ones with Narcissistic PDDPublished 16 hours ago by Amazon Customer
Wow! Truly brought incredible insight for me personally. As an adult child of Narcissist parents, this helped me see clearly the fallout in my own personal life, and helped me... Read morePublished 23 days ago by Hopeful One
Fabulous and informative for anyone dealing with these relentless behaviours at home or in the workplace.Published 27 days ago by Ally B
Eleanor Payson's knowledge on Narcissistic Personality Disorder was paramount to me. I attract Narcissists like fly paper and I now realize why. Read morePublished 1 month ago by Cathleen LeClerc
Read this book in a morning and it has motivated me to change my life. I will be recommending this book to many.Published 1 month ago by Dawn T.
I am an adult child of two parents and other family members who have NPD. I have been recovering from the primary wounding of my parents for about 3 years now. Read morePublished 1 month ago by Az C.
This was an interesting perspective on narcissism. I liked the way it was written and did not mind the Wizard of Oz comparisons as some other reviewers did. :)Published 1 month ago by Kathi Repka