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Women with Attention Deficit Disorder: Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life Paperback – November 29, 2005
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Top Customer Reviews
People who have ADHD are often extraordinarily bright, high achievers, even "miracle workers" among peers. Common companions to this level of achievement are monumental effort, inability to perform, and huge inconsistencies in application of skills.
What people near an individual with ADHD rarely realize is how well that individual is hiding the tremendous time, effort, and inconsistencies behind their accomplishments. All the public sees is the "magic" the ADHD individual can work. What's hidden is the extreme opposite (the "dark side"): an inability to perform so pronounced that the person with ADHD herself cannot grasp a reliable self-image from the enormous range between the low and high sides of her performance. When she shares her difficulties or others learn of them, her peers often react in disbelief and even mockery of the idea that this extraordinary, highly intelligent person cannot manage an everyday task like clearing clutter, doing the dishes, or paying bills. People with ADHD make life-altering decisions in an effort to avoid the failure, discovery of, or mockery/disbelief from peers: they move, quit their jobs, change majors, quit school, pick up addictive habits (self-medicating) like heavy caffeine usage, and so on (Solden, 2008).
Solden confirms that ADHD results in cognitive and psychological challenges, but it is a physical ailment that is medically identifiable via MRI (2008).Read more ›
Sari Solden's fresh perspectives have helped me hop off the Treadmill of Getting Nowhereness that so many women with ADD seem to be on. Her hefty book is packed with eye-opening comments that seem outside the perspectives of most other writers on the general subject of ADD/ADHD.
Solden's focus is on the impact of ADD behaviors on others and how this distorts the mirror in which we seek our sense of self. That dynamic translates into an array of family, community, and workplace issues. She provides the reader with why/because insights that, while never condescending, make recognizably clear and tenable what others have only skimmed over in their rush to suggest clever coping mechanisms.
These insights have already helped me explain to my own significant others -- those who are still speaking to me, that is! -- how I need to approach life and how they can best accommodate my unique style in return for the many ways in which I go overboard accommodating *them*. This delicate negotiation phase is a tricky one that Solden covers, I believe, too briefly given its importance; this is no mere matter of coping mechanisms. In a future edition, she might want to consider expanding that chapter. While at it, she might make her examples of dialog with significant others a little less stilted -- they're written in classic "Therapese" -- so readers could actually imagine themselves saying such things without dissolving into gales of laughter.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This book says everything you need to hear about women with ADHD.Published 1 month ago by Emily Rain
I see myself in much of what I've read, which is a relief. What has gotten in this readers way is Solden's sometimes melodramatic language.Published 1 month ago by Mb
Excellent explanations of the different aspects of ADD and how it can be so different for women.Published 2 months ago by Lou C.
I got this to better understand a female loved one, and it does it wonderfully. They offer meaningful advice and are both funny yet wise in what they say. Get it.Published 4 months ago by Bob HYN
This one was a REAL YAWNER!!!!! I GOT ABSOLUTELY NOTHING FROM THIS BOOK. I AM SOOO SORRY I WASTED MY MONEY!!Published 7 months ago by Eric, Debbie, Abby Paulson
I've read quite a few books on ADD, and found this one intelligent and useful. It's greatest virtue is that it articulates really nicely the differences in ADD for men and women. Read morePublished 9 months ago by Col. Mustard
This book changed my life. Honestly. After many years of suffering and therapy, I finally realized (by reading this book) that I might have ADHD. Read morePublished 9 months ago by Aliopa