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Marilyn Gardner

Worlds Apart: A Third Culture Kid's Journey Paperback – February 26, 2018

by Marilyn R Gardner (Author), Rachel Pieh Jones (Foreword)

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"I had grown up in Pakistan, was nurtured on her soil, took my first steps and said my first words there. Pakistan was a land that knew me before I had a recollection of 'being;' before I knew I was human."
This sequel to Marilyn Gardner's Between Worlds probes deeply into the journey that forms a third culture kid's identity. Gardner weaves together memories of joy and pain, close friendships and loneliness in a compelling portrait of an international childhood. From the close quarters of boarding school, to the strangeness of furloughs in her parents' native Massachusetts, Worlds Apart is an honest and moving portrayal of a young girl's struggles with faith, friendship, and belonging. The book offers an inspiring model for other third culture kids seeking to make sense of their unique experience, and the final chapter brings together many practical resources to help TCKs navigate their own journey.
"This is a book that shows the complications of a challenging childhood, the healing power of a faithful life, and the precious gifts Third Culture Kids are to the world." Rachel Pieh Jones, from the Foreword
"Part spiritual reflection, part childhood reminiscence and part travelogue, Marilyn's book will be especially welcomed by those trying to make sense of their own personal stories, especially if they involve transitions across multiple cultures and geographic locations." Ambassador Jonathan Addleton, author of The Dust of Kandahar and Some Far and Distant Place
Worlds Apart incorporates material previously published by Doorlight Publications under the title Passages Through Pakistan.

Print length

238 pages
Language

English
Publisher

Doorlight Publications
Publication date

February 26, 2018
Dimensions

6 x 0.5 x 9 inches
ISBN-10

0998223328
ISBN-13

978-0998223322
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Editorial Reviews

Review

[Worlds Apart] tells the captivating story of Marilyn Gardner's childhood as a 'third culture kid', raised by her Christian, American missionary parents in the heart of Pakistan. Gardner's eloquent story of the trials, tribulations, and lessons of growing up as a bridge between these rich cultures serves as an important lens through which Americans and Pakistanis can learn more about one another and their important long-term partnership in a time when the gap between the two nations seems to be growing ever larger.... Ambassador Akbar Ahmed, Ibn Khaldun Chair of Islamic Studies, American University, Washington, D.C

Marilyn Gardner's Worlds Apart - A Third Culture Kid's Journey (previously published under Passages Through Pakistan) is a wonderful book, presenting in both a descriptive and reflective way the wonder of her childhood that took place in the mountains of northern Pakistan, the villages and deserts of southern Pakistan and the small towns of New England, along with some of the places in between.
As the only daughter in a remarkable family that included four brothers, Marilyn emerges as a sensitive observer with an impressive eye for detail as well as a well developed memory for the small anecdote that often reveals a much larger meaning.
Part spiritual reflection, part childhood reminiscence and part travelogue, Marilyn's book will be especially welcomed by those trying to make sense of their own personal stories, especially if they involve transitions across multiple cultures and geographic locations.A deeply moving observer of the places, people and events that have surrounded her, she demonstrates sensitivity and understanding toward an often misunderstood part of the world, presenting the sights, sounds, landscapes and peoples of Pakistan in ways that are largely absent in both newspaper headlines and superficial social media accounts that all too often know little and understand even less.
Americans growing up in Asia and Asians growing up in America will especially gravitate toward this account, capturing as it does the complexity as well as the wonder and astonishment of childhoods spent in unlikely places. It will also resonate strongly with missionary kids and third culture kids everywhere.

~ Jonathan Addleton, former US Ambassador to Mongolia, is the author of several books including The Dust of Kandahar and Some Far and Distant Place

From the Author

While my book Between Worlds - Essays on Culture and Belonging is a series of reflections on growing up overseas and then living overseas as an adult, this new book Worlds Apart - A Third Culture Kid's Journey is a memoir and more chronological account of those years from birth to age 18. There is no single story in the third culture kid narrative, rather we each have our own unique stories, but my hope is that readers can connect with my story and some of the common themes of a third culture identity shaped by many places and events. My hope is also that readers will see the country of Pakistan in a much more nuanced way than the mainstream media portrays. I am ever grateful to Pakistan - Land of the Pure - for her never ending hospitality, her beauty, and her love. It is important to note that the initial part of the book was previously published under the title Passages Through Pakistan. This new edition has a foreword by Rachel Pieh Jones and a section at the end on Writing Your Own Story.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Doorlight Publications; Previously Titled Passages Through Pakistan ed. edition (February 26, 2018)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 238 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0998223328
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0998223322
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 11.4 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 0.5 x 9 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #1,980,282 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #2,843 in Christian Missions & Missionary Work (Books)
- #60,961 in Memoirs (Books)
- #70,049 in Parenting & Relationships (Books)

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Marilyn Gardner

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Marilyn Gardner was raised in Pakistan and went on to raise her own five children in Pakistan and Egypt before moving to the Boston area. She is the author of Between Worlds, (2014 Doorlight Publications) and Worlds Apart: A Third Culture Kid's Journey (2018 Doorlight Publications.) Both books resonate with those both inside and outside their passport countries who know the joys and challenges of living between two or more, often conflicting worlds.

In Worlds Apart, Marilyn traces a journey of growing faith and emerging identity in a small missionary community. From the close quarters of boarding school, to the strangeness of furloughs in her parents' native Massachusetts, this honest portrayal of a young girl's struggles with faith, friendship, and belonging will resonate deeply with a wide range of readers.

Between Worlds is a set of essays that explore the rootlessness and grief as well as the unexpected moments of humor and joy that are a part of living between two worlds. Between Worlds charts a journey between the cultures of East and West, the comfort of being surrounded by loved ones and familiar places, and the loneliness of not belonging. "Every one of us has been at some point between two worlds, be they faith and loss of faith, joy and sorrow, birth and death. Between Worlds is a luminous guide for connecting---and healing---worlds." - Cathy Romeo, co-author, Ended Beginnings: Healing Childbearing Losses

Marilyn's work also appears in What a Woman is Worth (Civitas Press, April 1,2014) Plough Quarterly, Fathom Magazine, and Among Worlds magazine. Marilyn has lived as an adult in Pakistan, Egypt, the United States, and most recently the Kurdish region of Iraq. She is the creator of the popular blog Communicating Across Boundaries and a contributor and administrator for A Life Overseas Blog.

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Dan Elyea

A deeply shared coming-of-age piece mostly set in Pakistan

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on August 21, 2018

Review of Worlds Apart

More than just a set of memoirs or a partial autobiography, this 214-page book [Worlds Apart (A Third Culture Kid's Journey) by Marilyn Gardner] brings important life lessons, insights, and encouragement for the TCK (Third Culture Kid) tribe. Actually, anyone who enjoys reading life stories will appreciate this book.

With bits of family history and memoir vignettes (along with her thoughts on most everything), this book takes us from Marilyn's birth to her graduation from high school. Written particularly for TCKs [a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture], Marilyn writes from first-hand experience. With roots in Massachusetts, before Marilyn's birth her parents moved to Pakistan where they served as missionaries. As a result, most of Marilyn's years through age 18 were spent in Pakistan, a country to which she deeply bonded.

Because I've been reading and appreciating Marilyn's blog for quite some time, I expected to hit a lot of familiar ground while reading her new book. Certainly in style, and possibly in content. In her blog she wrestles with heavy issues, shares deeply from her perspective, and fiercely advocates for the less fortunate. You may not agree with all her conclusions, but she is well worth listening to. A gifted writer, and one who constantly turns real life into focused prose that carries personal insights, Marilyn's foray into her earlier life does not disappoint.

Reading about the experiences of other TCKs—particularly how boarding school went down for them—especially interests me. Additionally, coming-of-age stories rank high in my hierarchy of favorite writings. As I read, I realized that most of the books I've seen in this genre were written by males. So getting the female take made for additional interest.

When I reached the place where Marilyn relates that she took her nurse's training at West Suburban Hospital, I smiled to myself, and thought of the Six Degrees of Separation concept. Quite a few years before Marilyn's time at West Sub, I dated a nurse-in-training there. Made many a trip to Oak Park, spent lots of time in the lounge in the nurses' dorm. Blip-blip-blip. . . around a dozen factors shared with Marilyn immediately came to mind; so much common ground between us. Partly because of this shared background, and mostly because Marilyn shares deeply and expresses herself very well, at times I laughed out loud; some other times I misted up.

I salute Marilyn for courageously letting many of the warts show. Making oneself vulnerable in this way takes a lot of honesty and guts.

Loosely organized by modes of transportation (ships, trains, buses, etcetera), the book is also somewhat chronologically sequenced. The choice of the transportation theme supports the “Journey” aspect in the title.

The book would benefit from a glossary for the many foreign words used (or a more consistent defining as each new word comes up). Not all foreign words were explained in context.

Marilyn closes out the book with supplemental material particularly geared to TCKs: a listing of useful references (briefly reviewed), excerpts from several TCK-oriented books or essays, and some applicable definitions (such as for two of my favorites: hiareth and saudade).

The subtitle sums it up well. Thanks, Marilyn, for sharing your very own Third Culture Kid's Journey. I enjoyed the ride, and hope you're already working on Part 2 of your journey.

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John Evans

Compassionately written reflections on growing up abroad

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on January 2, 2019

Besides being a fun read, Worlds Apart provides a couple valuable services.

First, it offers personal glimpses into a period of time (the post-colonial Indian subcontinent) that no longer exists or is accessible to any but those who experienced it personally. The cultural and physical landscape of Pakistan and India has changed significantly since the 1960s and ‘70s. Marilyn shows us what it looked and felt like to grow up there and in that particular time.

Second, the book gives insights into the lives and work of real missionaries. The Browns were normal people who were called to share the Gospel in a very different culture, and who sought to understand that culture in order to find sensitive and meaningful ways to illuminate the relevance of the Gospel’s message. They cared deeply for those with whom they associated. They accepted the sacrifice of being apart from their children. And they encountered challenges that required of them much faith, reason, and creativity in response.

For the TCKs among us, Marilyn’s book really resonates. Having been born in India shortly after Independence and attending boarding school in north India, my own experiences are remarkably similar to hers. In many ways, she has written my story!

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DSchmidt

If you've been a TCK, or know a TCK...

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 9, 2018

Reading "Worlds Apart" brought back memories of my own time growing up outside the US—my ‘passport country’, to use the author’s phrase. My life was different from Marilyn Gardner’s, but the way she talks about her experiences resonates with what I remember, too. As Gardner explains, that’s typical for third culture kids: the particulars vary, but most TCKs carry a sense of rootlessness, most of them feel like they’re ‘in between’, most of them struggle with answering the question, “where are you from?”.

Gardner writes in a captivating way about being raised in Pakistan—and while this book reads like both a travelogue and a memoir, complete with the sights, sounds, and smells of a ‘foreign’ culture, "Worlds Apart" really wants to reflect on the third culture kid experience. What’s it like to grow up in a place that’s ‘foreign’ to your parents—people who, because they are missionaries, government officials, military personnel, or business people, move overseas and raise their kids in one or more countries outside their ‘passport culture’—but also never fully ‘home’ for you?

"Worlds Apart" joins other similarly-themed books in examining an experience that is both shared by many and misunderstood by many. As such, it offers comfort and clarity: if you’re a TCK, you’ll resonate with Gardner’s descriptions of boarding school, ‘strange’ food, coming to grips with learning new languages and cultures, and a steady stream of ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’; if you’re friends with or related to a TCK, you’ll get a better grip on why they can figure out international travel but not know how to drive, or why they want to go somewhere else or do something different every couple of years.

I came across Gardner’s writing through an article on "saudade"—a Portuguese term for the homesickness people feel even when they’re around those they love. That led me to this book, which I’ll be recommending to TCKs and those in their orbit. "Worlds Apart" is a great resource for appreciating the TCK experience—and a trustworthy companion for jogging memories that have lain dormant for too long.

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