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Showing 1-10 of 186 reviews(Verified Purchases). See all 262 reviews
on September 4, 2017
I am only halfway through this book. I am a mix of fascinated and frustrated with it so far. The author has some very good science regarding the development of a teens brain which i find so very interesting as well as his experience with teens. His writing has, I think, a good mix of humor and seriousness to deliver this important information. My frustration is that this book is copyrighted in 2003 and things have already changed hugely. The influence of smartphones and "social media" (virtual communications) that our teens now have direct access and addiction to is pervasive and brings a whole new level to parents struggle in keeping them safe and on firm ground. I would LOVE to see this book updated to cover this new era of teenage-hood. Like I said, however, I am halfway through. I can update later because maybe somewhere in there there is the information I'm looking for possibly. Regardless, it's a decent book with good information in understanding the teenage mind.
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on June 8, 2012
I have 2 adolescent kids, one in mid teens, one about to enter. We have frustrating times, some minor, some more serious. Talking to other parents, I heard the following: "Oh you'll get them back in 5 years or so", "Fasten your seat belt for the next 8 years" and so on.
Though meant to reassure (this is just a phase, albeit a long one), I was disheartened too that the next years would be rough, I'd be best to just tolerate them, and by the time they snap out of it they'll be in college and gone, so goodbye kids, let's get through it.

I did NOT want the remaining years of my kids at home spent that way! I want a relationship with them. Okay, not the sweet kids that once were, but these teens who are on a great journey into adulthood!

What a relief to find this book! Though my kids aren't near some of the extremes mentioned, I gained a lot from all of it. The book is eye opening, frightening, has made me laugh, cry, examine myself thoroughly, realize a whole boatload of things about myself and my teenagers & wish I'd read this before my oldest hit adolescence. That said, it has some great reassuring messages: this is a passage kids travel and there are great ways to handle it so you can re-establish or maintain a good relationship with your kids.
If you are struggling with a snapping opinionated (or even out of control) teen and you are mourning the loss of you sweet, kind, loving pre-teen, thinking you've lost your child, then don't hesitate. Pick this up.

Be prepared for some scary tales and statistics and to read 'from the couch' notes that will be alarmingly like your situation. They give MORE reason to carry on with the book, to tool you up to be the lighthouse your kids need in these tough years - in an era where been a teenager has more complicated and different challenges than most eras beforehand. Since finishing the book, I have been putting into practice some of what I learned. And wow, instant results on some things, and small progressive steps on others.

The first 1/3 of the book covers kids: what's happening to them, their generation and individually.
The second 1/3 looks at us, the parents. What's changed so we have to change our parenting methods, what baggage we might have, and what we might be doing right or doing wrong, and what are role is and needs to be.
The last 1/3 is the nitty gritty "what to do when..." - covers everything from dealing with teenage tantrums, curfews, drinking & drugs, sex, schoolwork, chores... the lot.

At times, you'd be forgiven for thinking Bradley is about letting kids have their rages and we have to ignore, but it's not at all.
It's more about ~
i) as the parent, don't come over as the bad cop. Be the calm one so you gain more authority and respect

ii) don't sweat the small stuff. Build a bank of respect so when you meet the bigger and harder teen issues, you have far more power over your child

iii) 'fear and control' is not the same as 'respect and authority'. Learn the difference and your teen will behave outside the home, not just when you're around

iv) Gaining respect includes ~
not always having to have the last word; not getting into shouting matches; being the parent not their buddy (a parent is far better and more important than a buddy!); apologizing when you mess up or lose control; forgive them and ask them to forgive you; being strong and calm; listening listening listening; ask questions, don't lecture; letting go of your emotional need to have your sweet little pre-teen back

v) Inoculate don't control. You know the saying "Integrity is how you behave when no-one is watching" - well, this teaches you how to teach that to your kids.

Great book and one I will be re-reading over and over. I bought on Kindle then bought a paper copy to share.
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on September 21, 2017
I turn to this book whenever my teenage son pushes me too far. Rather than react to him, I retreat to my room and thumb through the book looking for the chapter or passage that is relevant to the circumstance at the moment. The mantra I say to myself is "He's Crazy, I'm not. This too shall pass and my lovable son will soon return." I know this to be true because my older son has come full circle after a couple of years of the silent treatment, rolling/evil eyes, shaking the head and passive defiance. I wish I had this book while I was going through the "crazy teens" with him. The anecdotal stories are useful, and in some cases calming.
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on July 18, 2016
Michael Bradley was able to provide insight into why we may react to our teens like we do and then shows us a much healthier way. I can see the positive effects of my new-found awareness in how I interact with my teenager. This book made me remember that I too was a crazy teenager and her priorities, though totally out of order, are just like mine were at her age. Wisdom that I have at 40 came with experience, not from what my mother told me to be true. I have to let her make her own choices, good or poor. That's how she'll grow, learning from mistakes I let her make on her own.
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on June 7, 2013
Before my two kids turned into teenagers, I thought I would be the most empathetic parent. I would understand my teens in a way my parents never did. I would be the cool mom. My kids would share everything with me and hang on my every word. My advice would be welcomed with open arms. (OK. Go ahead and laugh.)

Then, seemingly overnight, my kids grew. And I had teenagers. Beautiful, terrific, brilliant teenagers, yet infuriating, vexing, and consuming - at times to the point of physical and mental exhaustion. Michael Bradley's book has helped me put all this teenage drama in perspective and made me realize that their "crazy" behavior during these formative years is "perfectly normal" and that this too shall pass.

This parenting book is an invaluable source of information, filled with good humor and great guidance. I already took Michael Bradley's advice and tried a couple of his tips with my teenagers. Lo and behold - it worked! I cannot recommend this book highly enough! And after you've read it, you may feel compelled to buy a copy for all of the parents with teenage kids in your life...
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on February 21, 2014
This is a great book that has really given me a guide on dealing with teenagers - I do wish it were updated to help parents deal with the complexities of social media.
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on December 16, 2014
Pretty good general book on teenage behavior for today's society. Most of it I have encountered in one way or another (personally or working with adolescents in a group home); if you have experience with young adults, there's not much he's going to tell you that you probably don't already know or have tried. There are a few things I did pick up, some fine details of understanding their development. Not a blow you out of the water book, but good enough to help you to understand that yes your teen is crazy but they will live through it. Unless you have more extreme situations the definitely seek out further help.
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on February 16, 2016
As the mother of 2 teens, I keep this book by my bedside. This book explains teenagers behavior which can be strange at times! Gives very good suggestions on how to deal with certain situations. I love the book and would recommend it for any parents with teenagers
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on January 2, 2017
Excellent. Let's you understand what is inside your teenager's head and let's you think before reacting.
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on July 4, 2016
I really am enjoying this book. I got it a while back and read part of it and I just get busy. My son is 16 and I often call him an alien because I just do not even know who he is most days. This book is helping me to understand things a little more and that in a way they are crazy but that is okay and that I am not alone.
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