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You Can't Have Him, He's Mine: A Woman's Guide to Affair-Proofing Her Relationship Paperback – April 2, 2007
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About the Author
Marie H. Browne, R.N., Ph.D., a licensed marriage and family therapist and professor of psychiatric nursing for thirty-four years, maintains a thriving private practice providing therapy for individuals, couples, and families. Marlene M. Browne, Esq., member of the American Bar Association and New Jersey State Bar Association, is a family law attorney licensed in New Jersey, Massachusetts, and Colorado, and the author of several books.
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This merging is of a mother whose knowledge and experience comes from being a licenced family therapist and psychiatric nurse, with the understanding of legalities involved in divorce from a daughter who practices family law. They make a perfect team with just the right information to arm a wife in advance of an affair so that she can protect herself and her family.
This is not a book that concentrates on telling you what to do after the fact, though there is some advice given on that, it is more a guide with valuable information and tips on keeping the love alive and the family together. Ultimately that is their goal in writing this book.
I was particularly pleased with the fact that this book looked deeper into what personality traits a man may possess that may make him more susceptible to having an affair, instead of placing the blame on a wife who was neglecting him. In fact, it was because of this approach I would not hesitate giving this book to a young woman before she is contemplating marriage. Before love-blindness overcomes her and her ability to look at the men she dates not just as future husbands, but as future husbands who will be faithful.
The book also shares a lot of input about the "other woman", again providing the various motivating forces that create a woman on the prowl. The book provides an excellent profile of various types of women and why they are likely to become some man's "other woman".
Still, the wife is not left completely off the hook. Without laying blame on the wives with cheating husbands the writers are able to describe things a woman can do to affair-proof their marriage. They do this in such a way that a reader can't help but take a closer look at herself and see that she could already be paving the road to heartache.
This book also details many of the legal ramifications that result because of an affair. They provide an interesting outlook for the wife whose husband has already been feeding on the greener grass away from home. What a wife does is up to her, but the book clearly explains that divorce does not always have to be the outcome and that many marriages not only survive an affair, but seem to discover a rebirth of love.