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If You Don't Die to Self, I May Have to Kill You: An Extreme Marriage Makeover Paperback – May 1, 2006
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About the Author
Karen Long and her husband, Paul, own and operate Kappa Studios, Inc., a television production/postproduction facility in Los Angeles . Having graduated as class valedictorian from Pepperdine University with a B.A. in journalism and an M.A. in broadcast communications, Karen went on to become an award-winning reporter and producer in the number two media market in the nation. She also anchored for Good Morning America at the ABC affiliate in Palm Springs and has written articles published in the Los Angeles Times and Reader’s Digest . She and Paul have three children.
Top customer reviews
Author Karen Long uses an autobiographical style to share her growing pains, both in her marriage and with the Lord. Not only could I relate to many of her stories but she had me laughing out loud multiple times as she gently delivered solid, biblically based, marriage-changing truths. From high-needs children and career driven husbands to learning to let go of personal dreams in exchange for God's desires, Karen's writing was easy to read and easy to digest. I found myself picking up the book wanting to read more, and wanting to share what I was reading with others.
Whether you are looking for some marriage help or just some refreshing encouragement in spiritual growth, this is a great place to start. I highly recommend this book to all married (or want-to-be) women and will likely be in the arsenal I recommend to my own daughter when she's ready to look for her Prince Charming.
ONE WARNING: This book is not for the faint of heart. Karen challenges you to go more than skin deep and start by looking into your own heart for the changes you want to see in your life and in your marriage.
Hilarious and an excellent page turner is the only way to describe this wonderful book by Karen Long. At first glance you may not think that this is a Christian woman or a Christian book about marriage, but it is. The title itself gives you a hint about what lies in the pages.
Mrs. Long writes a tell all book about her marriage and the hardships that she and husband Paul endure. When they married neither one of them were Christians and were saved about two years into the marriage. This salvation of their souls does not even start to save the marriage, that slowly starts it downward spiral as soon as the vows are said.
The wordsy author was once a television journalist. She is now a mother of three and a stay at home mom. Her husband is an editor and a workaholic, which she views as him not being a part of their marriage and children's lives. She describes in detail some of the fights and issues that they have in their home.
She then goes on to tell about how both she and her husband are changed by God, and that all the trials and problems that they endured in their marriage were for a purpose. They went to Christian counseling, churches, and learned to love and respect each other. They learned to pray together, and confess sins while praying. They learned to communicate and not to blame. There are even ten points that Mrs. Long lists at the end of the book and she talks about them in detail, not just points. They are:
1. Divorce is not an option.
2. Be brutally honest about yourself.
3. Don't deny emotions.
4. Don't be demanding.
5. Find joy in sorrow.
6. Get to know God.
7. Make your partner your friend.
8. Pray together.
9. Live with ambivalence.
10. Die to self!
I absolutely loved this book. It has humor, and still a very important message. It takes courage and strength to air your dirty laundry out there for the world. I feel that this is a wonderful tool that God can use for all of us who read it. I know that it made me feel better to know that life is life, and marriage is hard, even for seemingly "perfect" people. I will be taking the lessons that I learned and applying them to my life. I am also going to share this book with all of my friends and family.
As Karen Long explains in her book If You Don't Die to Self, I May Have to Kill You, you're in good company if your marriage is a struggle. Long shares her marital history, the good, the bad and the ugly in a candid manner mixing the serious with humor.
Lest you think Long's book is a mere regurgitation of her personal struggles, it's not. Yes, she shares the struggles but it is done with a message. That message is a resounding command to take your troubles to God and lay them at His feet. And along the way it would be beneficial to carefully examine your own behaviors, attitudes, and willingness to forgive and even suffer at times. She challenges us biblically to work toward marital harmony.
I laughed, I shed a tear or two and far too often recognized my own behavior in Long's story. She gives the reader much to think about and act upon. I applaud her courage as she's given women permission to admit they are hurting and need help.
Armchair Interviews says: This is a must read for anyone who is married or is contemplating marriage.
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