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You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan Hardcover – February 16, 2010

by Janine Driver (Author), Mariska van Aalst (Author)

4.5 536 ratings

See all formats and editions

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Now You’re Talking!
Do you want to be bulletproof at work, secure in your relationship, and content in your own skin? If so, it’s more important than ever to be aware of what your body is saying to the outside world. Unfortunately, most of what you’ve heard from other body language experts is wrong, and, as a result, your actions may be hurting, not helping, you.

With sass and a keen eye, media favorite Janine Driver teaches you the skills she used every day to stay alive during her fifteen years as a body-language expert at the ATF. Janine’s 7-day plan and her 7-second solutions teach you dozens of body language fixes to turn any interpersonal situation to your advantage. She reveals methods here that other experts refuse to share with the public, and she debunks major myths other experts swear are fact:

Giving more eye contact is key when you’re trying to impress someone. Not necessarily true. It’s actually more important where you point your belly button. This small body shift communicates true interest more powerfully than constant eye contact.

The “steeple” hand gesture will give you the upper hand during negotiations and business meetings. Wrong. Driver has seen this overbearing gesture backfire more often than not. Instead, she suggests two new steeples that give you power without making you seem overly aggressive: the Basketball Steeple and the A-OK Two-Fingered Steeple.

Happy people command power and attention by smiling just before they meet new people. Studies have shown that people who do this are viewed as Beta Leaders. Alpha leaders smile once they shake your hand and hear your name.

At a time when every advantage counts—and first impressions matter more than ever—this is the book to help you really get your message across.

Print length

240 pages
Language

English
Publisher

Crown Publishers
Publication date

February 16, 2010
Dimensions

6.4 x 0.9 x 9.55 inches
ISBN-10

0307453979
ISBN-13

978-0307453976
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. A former body-language specialist with the Department of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Driver has put her life on the line more times than she can count, depending on her understanding of body language-how to read it and how to use it-to survive. Now a professional body-language trainer, Driver puts her lessons to paper with straightforward prose and easy-to-use methodology, intended to help readers break bad habits, overcome misleading assumptions, avoid blind spots, and project the kind of confidence they need for successful communication and/or negotiation. Offering a number of tips across a range of settings (business, romance, courtroom, etc.), Driver's advice will give readers immediate, effective results, such as a step-by-step guide to "Active Listening Head Moves": "Now try the head tilt with the double nod. Did the person speed up the conversation?" Sound examples (many drawn from her professional adventures), revealing exercises and self-tests, and a game sense of humor keep Driver's considerable expertise from overwhelming readers, making this an enjoyable and highly practical self-help.

About the Author

JANINE DRIVER is the founder and president of the Body Language Institute, located in Washington, DC. She is also a body language and deception detection expert and certified business coach who has appeared on NBC’s Today, ABC’s Good Morning America, The Rachael Ray Show, and Larry King Live. Janine travels the globe speaking to the corporate world on the fastest way to save time and grow business. Visit her online at lyintamer.com.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Crown Publishers; 1st edition (February 16, 2010)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 240 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0307453979
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0307453976
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 15.4 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6.4 x 0.9 x 9.55 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #571,507 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #1,425 in Popular Social Psychology & Interactions
- #4,001 in Self-Esteem (Books)
- #43,384 in Reference (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.5 536 ratings

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Mariska van Aalst
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Janine Driver
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Janine Driver, aka ''The Lyin' Tamer,'' is ready to take you on an exhilarating journey.
Janine is a NY Times Bestselling author, speaker and body language expert. Her innate ability to read between the lines and detect deception is transferable—she will utilize cutting–edge scientific discoveries and the secrets of body language to help any company or individual get what they desire in almost any situation.
Janine's style is simsultaneously engaging, humorous, and interactive. She instinctively combine education with motivation and comedy (don't forget, she's previously shared the stage with Chris Rock, Robin Williams, and Ray Romano). She consistently brings high energy, laughter, and boatloads of easily mastered content everywhere she goes.
Use Janine's knowledge to help you gain the edge you need to influence employees, clients, or business associates with ease.
With her in the driver's seat, you will learn to establish a natural rapport with a tough critic, unlock the hidden nonverbal cues to get others to embrace change, and become a proficient deception detective—use these new skills to investigate fraud, negotiate business deals, or sell more widgets. Her standing ovation keynote speeches are designed to increase interpersonal understanding and boost the outward impact of nonverbal communication. You will discover YOUR innate ability to decipher the hidden emotions of others and build better, more satisfying relationships by implementing the New Body Language communication secrets.
Janine is the founder and president of the internationally recognized Body Language Institute, located in Washington, DC. For over a decade she worked for the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives (ATF) training thousands of the world's most elite law enforcement officers (including the FBI, CIA, and Scotland Yard Police) how to decipher fact from fiction using proven body language interpretation methods. She then compiled her expertise into The New York Times and international best seller, You Say More Than You Think: A 7-Day Plan for Using the New Body Language to Get What You Want (now translated into 10 languages).
Janine has appeared on NBC's Today Show, ABC's Good Morning America<, CNN, TRUTV, E!, EXTRA, ESPN, The Doctor Oz Show, Rachael Ray Show, and Larry King Live. She has been quoted in The Washington Post, The New York Times, and The New Yorker magazine. Additionally, Janine is a regular contributor to Psychology Today, Men's Health, and Cosmopolitan magazines.
Janine's client list includes Proctor & Gamble, Coca-Cola, AOL, Hard Rock Hotels & Casinos, ASAE, Meeting Professionals International, Booz Allen Hamilton, Lockheed Martin, Wyndham Vacation Ownership, the National Association of Catering Executives (NACE), the Center for Association Leadership, and the International Association of Chiefs of Police.
See more on the author's page

Customer reviews

536 global ratings

How customer reviews and ratings work

Customers say

Customers find the book wonderful, interesting, and worth the time to read. They appreciate the valuable knowledge, practical tips, and revelant information. Readers also describe the book as easy to read and follow, saying it breaks it down well and makes corrections easy to make.

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Information quality Readability Ease of reading Value for money

40 customers mention "Information quality"35 positive5 negative

Customers find the book's information valuable, practical, and revelant. They say it makes concepts easier to understand. Readers also appreciate the good exercises and points. The core of the book highlights important information about body language and ties all the other information out there on the subject.

"...In a most engaging and informative "7-Day Action Plan", Janine Driver (with help from Mariska van Aalst) takes the reader through the process of..." Read more

"...like 'The Belly Button Rule' and the 'Right Side Rule' - some very practical and powerful tools I didn't read about elsewhere...." Read more

"...This book has been well written and made to learn from over 7 days which is better than becoming overwhelmed and giving up...." Read more

"...I really have gathered a lot of great points from her, and her experiences are the best. Enjoying this Book." Read more

40 customers mention "Readability"39 positive1 negative

Customers find the book wonderful, interesting, and worth the time to read and learn from. They say it's a great book for individuals looking to get a better understanding of body language and make better decisions. Readers also mention the content is good and helpful for growing professionally.

"...In a most engaging and informative "7-Day Action Plan", Janine Driver (with help from Mariska van Aalst) takes the reader through the process of..." Read more

"...It was very well written and fun." Read more

"Really good book but the binder quality is bad. Pages kept falling out of the book." Read more

"...Many of the author's suggestion make a great deal of sense and are worth following, but in one instance she makes a great faux pas in stating that..." Read more

13 customers mention "Ease of reading"13 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and follow. They say it's well-written and breaks it down pretty well. Readers also mention the author makes good points and makes corrections easy to make.

"Great in case you need to know who to trust. It was very well written and fun." Read more

"...The book is full of easy and quick fixes for you to make that will help your success and correct the myths that you have heard over the years, now..." Read more

"...The author makes many good points and the book is easy to read and follow with a fair number of black and white photos showing the before and after..." Read more

"...The Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes idea is great. She really breaks it down pretty well...." Read more

5 customers mention "Value for money"5 positive0 negative

Customers say the book is worth the money and will help with sales.

"...Worth every cent." Read more

"Shipping and all that was good, though the product itself is really worth the 20 bucks...." Read more

"Perfect condition, arrived before anticipated date, excellent price...." Read more

"...A book every law official should read. It will help me with sales." Read more

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Larry Underwood

Putting Yourself in Control

Reviewed in the United States on March 20, 2010

Verified Purchase

We all want to be in control of our careers; we especially want to be in control of our lives. The challenge of putting ourselves in control of our destiny can be a very tricky proposition; so much of our success depends on how well we interact with other people, by (ideally) creating a mutual "win-win" scenario.

Of course, in order to create the right environment for mutual collaboration, it's crucial to understand not only what other people are saying, with their words; we also need to be able to understand that tricky "non-verbal" communication, as well; aka "body language".

In a most engaging and informative "7-Day Action Plan", Janine Driver (with help from Mariska van Aalst) takes the reader through the process of understanding the language our bodies use when we're keeping our mouths shut, as well as preparing us for using that language "to get what we want"; usually, that entails a rewarding career, a fulfilling love life, and maybe even getting those surly teenage kids to understand we're on their side; really.

Driver begins the "body language course" by quickly debunking some of the myths from "The Old Body Language" (mind reading, erroneously judging, for example); she then quickly reveals the secrets to really understanding this stuff, which not only entails the direction our belly buttons are facing when we're interacting with someone, but even includes our "naughty bits" and other lower extremities. As Johnny Carson might've said..."That...I did not know!"

There's of course, much much more; but this is only a review; not a rehash of what's in store for the reader. I don't want to give too much away; if "naughty bits" doesn't peak the reader's interest, I give up.

Suffice to say, I thoroughly enjoyed this book; most importantly, I snagged a great deal of very useful information which will help me navigate my way through all sorts of tricky social/business encounters going forward. I'm pretty sure it could help even you!

15 people found this helpful

Helpful

Marley

Love learning how to read people

Reviewed in the United States on November 4, 2023

Verified Purchase

Great in case you need to know who to trust. It was very well written and fun.

3 people found this helpful

Helpful

Deiric McCann

The best I've read on body langauge and nonverbal cues

Reviewed in the United States on June 19, 2011

Verified Purchase

In writing Leadership Charisma I studied a lot about body language and how it impacts one's charisma.

I was so fascinated by the power of this topic that a short while ago I decided that I'd aim to become an expert - and I've been focused upon body language and nonverbal communication as applied to business.

So far I've read several tomes on the topic - by Allan Pease, Mark Bowden, Joe Navarro - and just recently this one by Janine Driver and Mariska van Aalst.

All of these books have their merits - but this is definitely the best one I've read to date.

What I liked about it is how the authors put their lessons into a real-world content - so, instead of providing a dictionary of various body language and gestures they provide a way of applying what they present in everyday situations.

For example, whereas many other books provide hard and fast defintions of what various body language forms and gestures mean, these authors continually point out just how important it is view any body language in the context of the normal body language of the person you're observing: the importance of observing people with a view to 'norming' their body language, so that you can then interpret any departure from their norms and only then consider the implications of the nonverbal signals they're sending.

They introduce a couple of critical concepts like 'The Belly Button Rule' and the 'Right Side Rule' - some very practical and powerful tools I didn't read about elsewhere.

However, with books like these the question is always: is what they teach practically implementable in real-life situations? Well, I have applied both of these principles daily over the last few weeks - and they work extremely well in helping to build trust and enhance communication. I'm sold.

Janine Driver is a former body language expert with the ATF and her expertise screams out from the book's chapters. The only problem I had, and one that made me squirm at times, was the way the authors occasionally seemed to lose the plot when it came to some of the exercises they suggest: take Salsa Dancing lessons, go skydiving, buy a Nintendo, and go belly dancing. (Seriously ladies - what were you thinking?!).

Worth every cent.

46 people found this helpful

Helpful

Chilove Lovesica5

Good

Reviewed in the United States on July 12, 2024

Good

Reviewed in the United States on October 30, 2023

Verified Purchase

Really good book but the binder quality is bad. Pages kept falling out of the book.

Helpful

Scott Sylvan Bell

Is your body language betraying you?

Reviewed in the United States on February 16, 2010

Verified Purchase

From the moment I heard Janine announce that this book was coming out in June of last year I knew I had to have it. I have read just about every book written on body language, some leave much to be desired while others are phenomenal. This book falls into the second category. There are many things about body language that are misconceptions the main issue is if that you believe them they are costing you, this books helps you determine those problems and fix them. This book helps dispel those myths and makes the corrections easy to make.

As you become aware of your actions you will recognize how to fix those issues you have the ability of becoming more dynamic and better with interpersonal skills. These all help no matter what field you are in but especially if you are in any type of sales.

As you learn to base line people you will pick up on those uncomfortable moments where you know that the person is either telling the truth or lying, great for you bad for them. This can give you the upper leg in everything from negotiating to raising kids.

This book has been well written and made to learn from over 7 days which is better than becoming overwhelmed and giving up. The book is full of easy and quick fixes for you to make that will help your success and correct the myths that you have heard over the years, now you will know them and how to correct them.

I must admit I do own 2 of Janine Drivers Body language DVD sets that were quite costly. Many of the lessons in one way or another are in this book you would have had to pay thousands for but they have been neatly packaged into a book for you.

14 people found this helpful

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Top reviews from other countries

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Kanchan Chaudhari

Not upto the mark

Reviewed in India on November 11, 2019

Verified Purchase

Results not good which the author mentioned in add.

José G.

Oportunista más que científico

Reviewed in Spain on February 1, 2016

Verified Purchase

En la línea de otros ex-agentes federales que intentan aprovechar su experiencia profesional para vender libros. Con escasímas referencias científicas, todo "batallitas" y supuestas "recetas" para interpretar el lenguaje corporal. Tan ameno como insustancial.

One person found this helpful

Translate review to English

M. D.

Great book on body language focusing on the whole body

Reviewed in Canada on May 6, 2011

Verified Purchase

Well written, concise, well organised book detailing body language in seven sections with some exercises and personal anecdotes added in.

This book has a section on facial body language but mainly focuses on whole-body language. There are other books out there that focus on facial expressions more thoroughly but don't focus on whole-body language much or at all on.

For those interested in body language this is one of the must-have books, along with perhaps something from Paul Ekman who focuses more on facial expressions (Emotions Revealed or Unmasking the Face are good suggestions). The author of this book is less academic and perhaps covers less overall ground than Ekman but is arguably more readable for beginners, given how information is presented in a clear, easy to understand manner.

Michele

Excellent

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 24, 2011

Verified Purchase

A very informative book and enjoyable read.You do need a video camera to do the 7 day plan.Can't use video on your mobile as you need to film yourself and your actions. Certainly worth buying for those interested in body language and is one of the more informative books on the market. I highly recommend this book.

One person found this helpful

thomasarmstrong

Great

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 20, 2020

Verified Purchase

Great

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