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You Will Not Have My Hate Hardcover – October 25, 2016

by Antoine Leiris (Author)

4.5 540 ratings

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INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER - "On Friday night you stole the life of an exceptional person, the love of my life, the mother of my son, but you will not have my hate."

On November 13, 2015, Antoine Leiris’s wife, Hélène Muyal-Leiris, was killed by terrorists while attending a rock concert at the Bataclan Theater in Paris, in the deadliest attack on France since World War II. Three days later, Leiris wrote an open letter addressed directly to his wife’s killers, which he posted on Facebook. He refused to be cowed or to let his seventeen-month-old son’s life be defined by Hélène’s murder. He refused to let the killers have their way: “For as long as he lives, this little boy will insult you with his happiness and freedom.” Instantly, that short Facebook post caught fire, and was reported on by newspapers and television stations all over the world. In his determination to honor the memory of his wife, he became an international hero to everyone searching desperately for a way to deal with the horror of the Paris attacks and the grim shadow cast today by the threat of terrorism.

Now Leiris tells the full story of his grief and struggle. You Will Not Have My Hate is a remarkable, heartbreaking, and, indeed, beautiful memoir of how he and his baby son, Melvil, endured in the days and weeks after Hélène’s murder. With absolute emotional courage and openness, he somehow finds a way to answer that impossible question: how can I go on? He visits Hélène’s body at the morgue, has to tell Melvil that Mommy will not be coming home, and buries the woman he had planned to spend the rest of his life with.

Leiris’s grief is terrible, but his love for his family is indomitable. This is the rare and unforgettable testimony of a survivor, and a universal message of hope and resilience. Leiris confronts an incomprehensible pain with a humbling generosity and grandeur of spirit. He is a guiding star for us all in these perilous times. His message—hate will be vanquished by love—is eternal.

Amazon.com Review

An Amazon Best Book of November 2016: You Will Not Have My Hate is luminescent and devastating. It made my skin grow tingly and pricked my eyes with tears. But it also filled me with hope. A slim book, even with extra space on the page, Antoine Leiris has written an achingly beautiful memoir about the death of his wife, Hélène, in the 2015 Paris terror attacks. Told during the immediate days after his wife’s murder—“with a burst of machine gun fire, they shattered our puzzle”—Leiris, together with his seventeen month old son, grapples with how they must “go on living alone, without the aid of the star whom they swore allegiance.” Leiris writes with intimacy and galvanizing affection. But what makes this memoir soar is Leiris’s refusal to surrender to hatred and anger towards those that murdered his wife: “So, no, I will not give you the satisfaction of hating you,” he writes “…all his life this little boy will defy you by being happy and free.” Humming with humanity, grace and intelligence, You Will Not Have My Hate will alter the ground below you and the sky above. Buy this book and then buy it for the ones you love—for in it Leiris has reminded us of what it is to live. --Al Woodworth, The Amazon Book Review

Review

"An extraordinary read, honest, intimate and lightly poetic. It is a testament of love, loss and grief and also the often untold story of those who are left behind and must find a way to go on"—Irish Independent

"A book of exceptional grace... the most extraordinary account of an emotional journey" – Observer

“All about love and loss…. An astonishing feat… I defy anyone not to shed tears at least once when reading this book.” – Sunday Times

“You Will Not Have My Hate is a courageous and profoundly life affirming manifesto that will live beyond any momentary victory of terrorism. How indestructible these beautiful words are… A heartbreaking eulogy.” –New York Journal of Books

“In a world of anodyne literature, Antoine Leiris's You Will Not Have My Hate stands out like a flare in the night… A work of pure grace… Ultimately a book about language and its necessity as a means not just of making sense of unspeakable tragedy, but of surviving it.” — Interview Magazine

“Courageous and inspirational, without a wasted word.” – Kirkus, starred review

“One of the most enduring and memorable messages after the deadly attack on Paris's Bataclan theater was written by journalist Antoine Leiris… This bracing, courageous, and utterly beautiful book shows us that he had much more to say.” – 21 Must-Read Books for Fall, Elle.com

“This powerful one-sitting read speaks of a very specific grief to which many in the world feel connected.”—Booklist

About the Author

Antoine Leiris is a journalist in Paris, and a former cultural commentator for France Info and France Bleu. You Will Not Have My Hate is his first book.

Translated from French by Sam Taylor, the author of The Republic of Trees, The Amnesiac and The Island at the End of the World. He has translated more than a dozen novels from the French, including Laurent Binet’s HHhH and Maylis de Kerangal's The Heart.

Print length

144 pages
Language

English
Publisher

Penguin Press
Publication date

October 25, 2016
Dimensions

5.5 x 0.75 x 9 inches
ISBN-10

0735222118
ISBN-13

978-0735222113
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Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Penguin Press; First Edition (October 25, 2016)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 144 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0735222118
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0735222113
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 7.2 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.75 x 9 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #1,812,572 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #4,330 in Grief & Bereavement
- #8,398 in Political Leader Biographies
- #51,186 in Memoirs (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.5 540 ratings

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4.5 out of 5

540 global ratings

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Jessica

A true story of a father & son standing in grief

Reviewed in the United States on January 31, 2021

Verified Purchase

This is a heartbreaking, poignant story of a wife & mother, Helene, who is a victim of the terrorist attack in Paris.

The story starts with her husband learning of the senseless, violent incident and continues as father and son process their way through grief.

This should be a required reading.

He speaks of grief with such raw accuracy.

This was one of my favorite passages from the book.

“no, I will not give you the satisfaction of hating you. That is what you want, but to respond to your hate with anger would be to yield to the same ignorance that made you what you are. You want me to be scared, to see my fellow citizens through suspicious eyes, to sacrifice my freedom for security. You have failed. I will not change.”

One person found this helpful

Helpful

C PAPPERT

An Amazing Tale

Reviewed in the United States on November 30, 2022

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Short story (120 pages). Poignant, gut-grabbing. Could not put it down. Doubt I could share the author's sentiment towards those who murdered his wife, but I do thank him for putting it in writing.

Helpful

carilynp

so sad, and yet so beautiful

Reviewed in the United States on November 3, 2016

Verified Purchase

This memoir is incredibly moving, so sad, and yet so beautiful. Leiris details, in almost a diary like way, exactly how he got the news of his wife’s death. She was at the concert hall, where the massacre occurred. He could not believe it was happening. That she was gone. He had every hope that she was going to come home. Until he got the call. How was he going to tell his 17-month-old son that his mother was not coming back. In nothing but a sweet and poignant way. It is hard to read this book without shedding a tear. Yet, it gives you hope that you can carry on and keep someone whom you love in your heart. His view is striking and I can only imagine that he is one amazing parent who will raise a kind and loving son who is able to know a mother who loved him through his father’s eyes.

18 people found this helpful

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Keiera

I literally read this book in two days and I ...

Reviewed in the United States on July 31, 2018

Verified Purchase

I literally read this book in two days and I cried a lot. I mean a lot. It was touching in so many ways and I appreciated the rawness and truth that was being told after enduring such an incredible loss. The emotion behind it was touching and also necessary for us as human to understand. Especially in this day-in-age where terrorists attacks are read about on a daily bases. It allows you to see the aftermath that it has on families, on individuals and on countries as a whole.

One person found this helpful

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BBRemmes

Poignant

Reviewed in the United States on August 1, 2017

Verified Purchase

Beautiful. Soul Searching. I was deeply touched. Someone suggested that I read this because I've experience such grief since the elections in the USA. They thought it might help me. In that aspect it did not. It did awaken me to the difference between the magnitude of personal life-changing loss vs. having to reorient my understanding of the political word I live in. I have realized for several months now that "hating" does more to destroy who I am than anyone else.

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Ali

Not what I expected but nice book

Reviewed in the United States on November 21, 2016

Verified Purchase

It's more of dairies of the fist few weeks or so after the attacks that what the title represents. I was expecting the author to speak out his philosophy of "not hating" I mean I was really interested in reading about how he faced the need to hate the criminal as the title represents to me but actually the author was focused in his grief writing this book. However I enjoyed it.

2 people found this helpful

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monica barbeito

Very intimate peek into a grieving soul

Reviewed in the United States on January 14, 2022

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I found this book very moving, it was so real the emotions that you have while grieving. It is beautifully written

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Star

Short but author has allowed us into his thoughts...

Reviewed in the United States on June 25, 2017

Verified Purchase

Short but author has allowed us to enter his vulnerable world after the death of his wife. Heartbreaking but filled with raw honesty, Leiris describes how a terrible tragedy broke him and tore his family a part. Yet, he finds a way to survive and thrive, as well as maintain his clarity and still be compassionate toward those who took his wife from his world.

One person found this helpful

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Top reviews from other countries

Shirley Henderson

Heartbreakingly beautiful

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 21, 2023

Verified Purchase

How is it possible to describe grief with such poignancy and beauty? I feel humbled that Antoine Leiris is able and willing to articulate the oh so personal depth of pain in such a moving manner. It’s a book I will read and reread over and over again.

Debbie Pokornik

Honest, Inspiring, Revealing

Reviewed in Canada on January 3, 2017

Verified Purchase

A beautifully written memoir of a mans shattered life as he tries to make sense of a situation where sense does not apply. You will not have my hate is raw, unapologetically real and somehow manages to warm the heart while sharing a horrific and heart wrenching story. Definitely worth the read

Matthew

Inspirational

Reviewed in Australia on September 28, 2018

Verified Purchase

Such an inspirational story I couldn’t put it down

witchsinger

Five Stars

Reviewed in Canada on November 17, 2016

Verified Purchase

the most beautiful book I have read in decades - moving and poetic and I recommend it to everyone.

Mrs A Hunt

Emotional but it should be read

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on November 16, 2016

Verified Purchase

This book had me in tears.
At first, the authors name doesn't seem familiar - but the events definitely do.

When Antoine Leiris kissed his wife Helene as she left on a night out, he had no idea he would never see her alive again.
She was going into Paris to watch the band Eagles of Death Metal at the Bataclan theatre.while Antoine stayed home to look after their baby son Melvil.
In a matter of seconds Antoine would be left a widower and Melvil motherless at the hands of a gunman/gunmen who stormed the theatre and fired indiscriminately.

You will not have my hate is the result of an open letter which was written by Antoine via facebook. telling the terrorists they will not have his hate.
That no matter how evil the deeds are they do, that acts of atrocity will not define the life of his son'

This memoir shows the strength of this man.
His journalistic background shows in his writing, which it tight and full of emotion but no self pity.
Every word counts and is important.

This evil act was unnecessary and indiscriminate.
They set out to kill as many people and they didn't care who.
The title of the book says it all really.
A truly heart wrenching read and even though at times, it was difficult to read, I am happy I did.
A beautifully written memoir of the worst day of Leirise's life.
A difficult read but highly recommended.

2 people found this helpful

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