on September 21, 2009
This is the first review I have ever written for a book. Never have I ever been so compelled to try and get the word out on an issue. This book MUST be read by every parent in the United States. Sex Ed in our schools must be updated. IT is false.
I heard Dr. Grossman interviewed on the radio. I was so compelled by her intellect and knowledge of the subject of Sexual Education in the public schools, that I purchased her book. This was a first for me. You see, I have three teenage children, two in college, and one in high school. I thought that it was high time I took a look at what their peers are being taught.
Dr. Grossman lays out, systematically and thoroughly in this book, the inaccuracies and outright lies of what is being taught by SIECUS (The Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States), Planned Parenthood, and Advocates for Youth in our schools, and on websites that are recommended by our schools in the Sex Ed programs and accompanying pamphlets and brochures handed out in the nurses office or during the class.
This book starts with showing who is exactly teaching your children. She then covers the topic of the differences between boys and girls, and the false information taught in the SE classes. Next, she talks about the abstinence/protection/do it if it feels right issue, the doctor's responsibility, the plagues of incurable sexually transmitted infections, gender identity and homosexual/heterosexual/transgender/etc. issues. All of these topics are taught to our children in the public schools. If a child doesn't go to a public school, not to worry, most of this information is also available on line from the three above mentioned organizations and their websites, plus the sites that they link from within their sites. No child in the United States is truly exempt from this teaching.
The text is 188 pages with 48 pages of footnotes in much smaller font than the text. She amazed me with the research, and study that went into this book. In the introduction, I began to verify each footnote sited. By the end of the introduction, which contained 31 footnotes for 14 pages of text, I was convinced that she had done her homework and had completely studied and verified her claims. She makes a statement, and then shows you with easy to verify footnotes that prove what she is saying is true. Many footnotes are easily found online.
The book is filled with personal stories of her medical practice at university medical centers, as well as others that she has gleaned elsewhere.
She convinced me that the SE classes are being taught with faulty, outdated data, and sometimes even unscientific data. She presents in this book, the most up to date data and research available. One table that she presents as an appendix at the end of the book is dated June 19, 2009. This is current information. This is valid information.
Our children are not being given the most up to date, accurate information in their sex ed classes. They are being misled about things such as condom failure rates, percentages of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), the fact that the younger you begin sexual activity, the more likely you are to become infected with an STI. This book needs to be read by you and your children if you deem it appropriate for their age. I would never recommend a parent give this book to your children to read before you have pre-viewed it. It is a book that we have discussed at great length in our home, but I would not allow younger children near it. It is graphic when it needs to be. We are talking about sex here, so a parent must use their own discretion when teaching the facts in this book to their children.
If you think that contemporary sex education is good for our children, reduces teen sex, and reduces the risk of infection and disease, you had better think again. The sex ed crowd is not interested in actually helping kids, but in pushing radical agendas.
They will not tell our children about abstinence and moral values; instead they will push every amoral and immoral agenda item there is, be it cross-dressing, sadomasochism, androgyny and "diversity". Instead of helping our children, this group of radical social engineers is in fact harming our kids.
Miriam Grossman, M.D., knows all about this. She has been working with young people for decades in this area, and she has seen firsthand the tremendous damage being done to our young people by the very powerful and very insidious sex ed lobby.
Says Grossman, "Sex education is not about health - it's a social movement, a vehicle for changing the world. It happens one child at a time, and it goes on right under your nose." One simply has to look at the sex ed curricula to see the truth of this.
Armed with big bucks and harmful ideologies, the militant sex education industry has been doing inestimable damage to our young people, and is using our schools to push their relativistic, anything-goes ideology. Based on the lies and perverted agendas of sexologists like Alfred Kinsey, the sex ed lobby is working overtime to indoctrinate our young, break down their moral values, and turn them into hyper-sexualised individuals.
But despite this avalanche of sex education, there has been a huge rise in sexually transmitted infections, teen pregnancies, abortions, and promiscuity. All this tsunami of sex ed has done is compound the problems, not reduce them.
In the US today a quarter of all adolescent girls have a STI. The sex ed industry is directly responsible for this pandemic. Says Grossman, "they are dedicated to promoting radical social ideologies, not preventing disease." Instead of following good science, these educators are instead following radical and flawed agendas.
The mega-rich groups like SIECUS and Planned Parenthood simply ignore the data and evidence which argues for gender differences, the case for abstinence, and the dangers of early sexual activity. Instead their message is: `the more sex ed the better, and the earlier the better'.
As Grossman documents, the main concern of these groups is not the health and safety of young people, but complete sexual freedom. They want kids to experience sexuality in any and every form, and ignore the values and beliefs of their parents and communities.
Our impressionable and innocent children will learn all about sex play, threesomes, gender-bending, adult products, sado-masochism, and every type of kinky and bizarre sex acts. That is what is being pumped into our kids' hearts and minds.
The mantra of the sex ed lobby is that sex is always only good, and any and every expression of it should be embraced. Nothing is taboo, and everything goes. The only vice according to the sex ed lobby is the narrow and restrictive values of parents and church groups.
Indeed, the worst thing that can be done is to offer any moral framework about sex. No judgment is allowed. In fact, Planned Parenthood insists that "the most important lesson we can share with our kids is, `Being different is normal'." There you have it. Is your thing homosexuality, S/M, group sex, or incest? No probs, it is all fully normal, and the main thing is to give free rein to all your sexual urges, and make sure no one judges you for your particular tastes.
These groups insist that children are sexual from the womb, and the only real damage to them comes from those who say they should wait, abstain, and be monogamous. These are the dangers the sexperts want to keep our kids from. They want to turn our kids into sexual dynamos who will try everything and say no to nothing.
"The experts do not provide teens with all they need to know to make informed decisions, nor is their information medically accurate. They dismiss fundamentals of child development, and omit critical findings in neurobiology, gynecology, and infectious disease."
With tonnes of detail and evidence, Grossman backs up these claims, and then some. Indeed, it is the detail that really makes for depressing reading. She mentions one former SIECUS president who is now a minister. She is so committed to pre-marital sex that she refuses to marry couples who are not already sexually active!
These groups are not so much interested in science or medicine, safety or protection, as they are in pushing their sexual libertarian agendas. And even if they do tell kids the cold, dry facts on STIs, they are not telling them about the emotional consequences, or telling them that these are fully avoidable.
"For many people, especially teens, the diagnosis is a devastating, life-changing event - the worst thing that's ever happened to them. To pretend that such an event is unavoidable is nothing short of irresponsible.... The medically accurate message is that all sexually transmitted infections, and the anguish that accompanies them, are 100 percent avoidable."
She continues, "A life free of herpes, warts, chlamydia, and others is possible. One simply has to delay sexual behaviour, find someone who also waited, and then be faithful to one another." But that of course is the last message the sex ed lobby wants to present. That runs counter to their doctrinaire sexual license philosophy.
Grossman looks at various other agenda items of the sex ed brigade: the push for androgyny and a genderless society; the push for homosexuality and related alternative lifestyles; the promotion of abortion as the chief solution to the "problem" of pregnancy; and so on.
Every chapter in this well-documented book makes for scary reading. This is nothing less than a war, and it has been declared on our children. Adult social-sexual agendas are trumping the well-being of our children. Indeed, the concern is not for our children at all, but for the promotion of a radical worldview.
It is time to resist all this. Just as we have declared war on smoking and drink driving, so too we need to declare a war on teen sexual behaviour - all three are equally serious and equally deadly. Above all else kids need to be taught how to say no to sexual pressure, and learn how to control sexual appetites, rather than inflame them.
The truth is, not all sexualities and sexual activities are equal. Many are downright dangerous, and we have a responsibility to our children to let them know these truths. Lying to them to push a radical agenda helps no one. Indeed, it is killing our kids.
Our young people need to be told the truth about sexuality. They are certainly not getting it from the sex ed crowd. This book offers a wealth of fact, evidence, truth and sexual sanity. Our kids desperately need this. Every concerned parent should grab this book, master its contents, and spread the word.
on September 23, 2009
I work as an Executive Director of a Women's Resource Center, so every day I see the results of what are kids have been taught about sexuality through educators, organizations such as Planned Parenthood and the media. I see the heartbreak of seeing a (very) young woman who has had one encounter after another and she wonders what went wrong. Why, after everything she's been told is she left with the aftermath that includes not just an unplanned pregnancy and an STD or two, but a heart that's been broken over and over again.
Our kids have been taught it is possible to have sex "just for fun" with no consequences. This has now been proven to be untrue because no matter how one goes into an encounter our bodies/brains respond to that encounter in a way that ties us to the other person--whether we like it or not. Whether we like that person or not.
I applaud Dr Grossman for speaking the unpopular truth and using facts to reveal the lies both parents and their children have believed. This is a must read for EVERY parent and for everyone who loves kids and wants to do something to expose the lies
on September 22, 2015
I like to see that there is variety of opinions in any major issue affecting children and youth....and I love when ultimately parents and individuals have the right to choose by themselves whichever view they want to apply in their lives. If as a parent you are considering the spiritual and emotional implications of sexuality, then, this is a wonderful book to read. If your views are only based on physiological effects of health such as pleasure and infectious disease transmission and the current agenda of sex ed, you may not like this book. My first experience with this book was that even without reviewing the current research in either side of this issue, this book spoke truth to my heart.... and I felt that its contents are aligned with my conscience and Lincoln's motto: "when I do good I feel good, when I do wrong I feel bad". I completely support Abstinence. I am quite familiar as an educator for many years (both in secondary and college settings) of the dreadful implications of premarital sex. I wish more scholars and educators would also raise their voices so children and youth in schools are not forced to be taught only one side of the coin...which may open doors to much regret. Thanks a lot Dr. Grossman for speaking up based on your extensive experiences with students and your personal conclusions from data, research, and developmental psychology. High five to you!! Joaquin Fenollar, PhD
on August 8, 2009
Wow! Just as the subtitle of the book states, Dr. Grossman exposes lies - sex education lies - and that they harm our children. She asserts that the health of our youth are in a `911 emergency' state and explains how the sex education industry priorities are detrimental to our children. She counters with the biological and neurological truths that should be part of sex education messages they receive.
"You're Teaching My Child What?" is a must read for any adults who care about and are involved in the lives of young people. Check out the references Dr. Grossman has highlighted as examples of teen `health' sites - ones that are endorsing risky, bizarre and fringe behaviors. Learn why she believes sexuality educators "send these kids into a minefield". Don't assume her message is simply about abstaining from sex, as her approach focuses on biological truths and hard science.
Most importantly, Dr. Grossman guides parents, educators and health providers as to the message we should be conveying to our youth. She includes practical suggestions for parents "to optimize your child's chance for a life of healthy sexuality". One can gain knowledge to counter destructive messages your child is receiving and be encouraged to provide the truths they deserve to hear.
As a mother who has checked things out enough to be alarmed and shocked at the sexuality indoctrination, I am grateful to Dr. Grossman for her commitment and boldness. I highly recommend "You're Teaching My Child What? A Physician Exposes the Lies of Sex Education and How They Harm Your Child".
Miriam Grossman wrote the terrific and important "Unprotected" to talk about the hostility college health programs have towards chastity and religious scruples towards sexual relations. This book is for parents of kids going to schools (mostly public schools) where the agenda is almost universally to teach kids that sex is fun, fine, safe, and to ignore their parents and churches. She arms you with up to date science on brain development, body maturation, and how sexual relations affect males and females differently. Her argument that the present agenda towards breaking down any and all sexual inhibitions or rules is not only an affront to you as a parent, it is a terrible disservice to the kids.
She writes (on page 82), "Teens are not small versions of adults. They need us along with our rules and limit setting - even though they'll rarely say so. About sex, they must be told: of course you're interested, your urges are natural and healthy, but now is not the time. Trust us, this is not like cigarettes or fast food: one poor choice, just one, can affect the rest of your life. Be smart, we expect it of you, and we know you can do it. Anything less than that is an awful disservice to our kids."
Grossman does a great job in exposing the agenda, who is behind it, and how they have gained control of the public school classroom. With this information you can band together with like minded parents and put pressure on your school and your school board to bring sanity back into the classroom and what is being said to our children.
Besides the introduction and conclusion, the book has seven chapters. You will learn about what is being taught to your kids, why it is being taught, and who is behind it. I think the chapters on why girls and boys are different and why sexual behavior must have limits are important and will arm you in talking to your kids and your school.
She also provides a chapter that spells out how the current propaganda being used in the name of educating our kids actually violates the oath doctors take to care for patients. The chapter on the costs and damage caused by the current STD plague will probably upset you. We spend billions of dollars each year dealing with diseases caused by behavior our schools are encouraging. No, condoms are not enough.
You will also get two chapters discussing the ideas surrounding gender and the politics backing the effort to break down the traditional views of men and women. And why those efforts are not only wrong but toxic to society and individuals.
Her conclusion is a short wrap-up of what she thinks a sound sex education program would be and what you can do about it including how to defeat the "hicks versus Harvard" defense that will be used against you. The book also includes a helpful table of sex education by state so you can get a starting point in your efforts.
A solid and important book for parents who do not think the current approach to sexual information and morality being taught in our k-12 programs are sound or healthy for our children.
Reviewed by Craig Matteson, Ann Arbor, MI
on September 3, 2009
I applaud Dr Grossman for having the courage to write this book! Every parent should read about the ideology of sexuality education being promoted in schools across the country to younger and younger children. As a registered nurse and a health educator I was finding my experience of advocating for optimal health messages in communities outlined in Dr Grossman's book. The tactics of intimidation of the so called "Sexuality Education Experts" such as Planned Parenthood, SIECUS and Advocates For Youth read like a playbook. These groups use words to intimidate anyone who happens to disagree with their ideology of sex with anyone, at anytime, with any age for any reason. In fact one of the SIECUS flyers states, "When it comes to sex, there is no such thing as too much information". I wonder if parents and child psychologists agree with that?? To describe curricula that advocate healthy relationship building, healthy family formation, advocating and imparting skills to delay sex, and to wait and prepare for marriage with intentionality and dignity for themselves, they use words such as "unrealistic", "not medically accurate", "withholding life saving information", "fear and shame based", "religious", "homophobic", "not research or evidenced based" and the list goes on. Dr Grossman calls this the Hicks vs. Harvard phenomenon!
Additionally she lays out the hard data regarding teen brain development, true prevention and the risks of too early sex especially given the biology of a young girl's body which makes her more susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases and infections. As a mother of 4 and a medical professional, I say: This is a MUST READ for every parent!
on March 17, 2010
I found this book in the bookstore and picked it up when my eldest daughter started middle school in 5th grade and started coming home with book after book from the school library containing extremely violent material, graphic sexual content and some strong profanity, which she as well as her dad and I found disturbing. I began doing some investigating and was shocked at what I was discovering. My husband and I sat down and read this book together. We were appalled at what has been going on in the public schools for some time now. We read the book next to our computer so we could check out the information being given by Dr. Grossman and found that we could verify almost everything she wrote. The insidious sexualization of our children has been going on right under our noses for a long time. And even us parents who have worked very hard to raise our children with good values and who have carefully monitored their T.V., video and computer activity and followed movie ratings guidelines have been undermined by an institution that we have trusted our children to - Public Education. Thank you, Dr. Grossman! You have helped us make the final decision that our two precious daughters will NOT be returning to the public schools next year.
on October 25, 2015
Great book, lots of facts, full of purpose to protect our children rather than push a social movement. Had my kids watch her youtube video so they can know when they are being conned and manipulated out of their health and livelihood from a movement and culture that doesn't care about them or their future families.
on August 7, 2009
Dr. Grossman's book is outstanding. She reveals the extreme bias endemic in much of the purported sex education offered our children and teens. The strength of her analysis is that it is based not on moralizing, but rather on hard scientific and medical facts. Facts that are untaught by the Sex Education Industry because they contradict the social agenda advocated by many of the so-called experts.
The greatest impact of her book may be on parents and their kids, who will probably respond with comments like, "I didn't know" and "Why didn't anyone ever tell me these things?"
Dr. Grossman explains complex neurological and medical matters in a straightforward way, while taking head on, by name, the self-proclaimed experts who lie to our children.
Yes, boys and girls are not the same. Yes, their reactions differ, their biology differ, their vulnerabilities differ.
Parents should read this book carefully and remain very involved in setting meaningful limits on the sexual conduct of their children.
As a concerned father, I applaud and thank Dr. Miriam Grossman.