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Present Perfect: A Mindfulness Approach to Letting Go of Perfectionism and the Need for Control Paperback – June 3, 2010
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While there's no doubt that setting high standards for yourself is a good thing, you've probably already noticed that perfectionism can come at a high price. And when you take steps to try to change, it's easy to be too hard on yourself and fall into the same traps that keep you feeling stressed and disappointed. This book presents a revolutionary approach to overcoming perfectionism—a way to transform your need for precision into self-acceptance, compassion, and love for each perfectly imperfect passing moment in our lives.
In Present Perfect, you'll use the Buddhist psychology of mindfulness to learn to accept the present moment in all of its ordinary perfection. This book is filled with over 150 exercises and meditations that you can practice to become more flexible toward yourself and others without losing your love of a job well done. With this compassionate approach, you'll soon be able not only to accept life as it is, but also become more accepting and forgiving of yourself and others.
- Print length208 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherNew Harbinger Publications
- Publication dateJune 3, 2010
- Dimensions6.2 x 0.5 x 9.2 inches
- ISBN-101572247568
- ISBN-13978-1572247567
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Editorial Reviews
Review
“This brilliant and practical new book is designed to help alleviate the excess stress and dissatisfaction of perfectionism, one of the main practices of the extremely popular, if unheralded, religion I lovingly call Control Freakism. Pavel Somov gives us numerous helpful awareness exercises, conscious inquiries, insights, mindfulness practices, original perspectives, and penetrating ideas, all conducive to helping us free ourselves from this tyrannical inner demon and experience the radiant reality of things just as they are. Acceptance has its own transformative magic, and I heartily recommend this work to all who want to transform, awaken, and edify.”
— Lama Surya Das, founder of Dzogchen Meditation Centers and author of Awakening the Buddha Within
“Rarely does a work of art like Present Perfect fall upon one’s desk. This book allows us to transform existential pain caused by our need to be perfect. This book is abundant with tools and ideas that equip the reader to resolve guilt, shame, and perfectionism. Once you accept and surrender your perfectionism, the magical paradox of mindfulness as a healer will unfold.”
— Ronald A. Alexander, Ph.D., executive director of the Open Mind Training Institute and author of Wise Mind, Open Mind
“Even those of us with a lot of self-help reading under our belts will experience many a-ha moments while immersed in Present Perfect. Somov’s approach is highly logical, creative, resourceful, and compassionate. Never once will you feel judged; instead, you’ll feel understood. I highly recommend this valuable resource to therapists and anyone with perfectionist tendencies.”
— Dina Cheney, author of Tasting Cluband Williams-Sonoma’s New Flavors for Salads
“Present Perfect takes a wholly fresh look at an age-old problem by applying a generous dose of the healing salve of mindfulness. Filled with fascinating references and down-to-earth examples, this book skillfully guides the reader through exercises and strategies that can transform the paralyzing and demoralizing pattern of perfectionism. Present Perfect is the perfect way to liberate yourself from the guilt, shame, and blame of perfectionism and rediscover the freedom of living in the ‘what is.’”
— Donald Altman, psychotherapist, former Buddhist monk, and author of The Mindfulness Code
“Pavel Somov offers an intelligent, witty, and compassionate critique of perfectionism and makes a compelling case that life is already perfect. I found this book to be thoroughly enjoyable and personally and professionally useful from the first page. I feel as comfortable recommending this book to my colleagues as I do to my patients and am confident that both will find it of tremendous value in their lives. Since perfectionism is often the other side of compulsive and addictive behavior, this book will be relevant to all who seek more moderation and balance in their lives.”
— Andrew Tatarsky, Ph.D., clinical psychologist in New York City specializing in treating addictive behavior and author of Harm Reduction Psychotherapy
“In this book, Somov not only provides a plethora of highly accessible and instantly applicable ways to connect with mindful awareness, but also provides lucid and rational ways to dethrone the inner tyrant of perfectionism and fully live in the completeness of each moment.”
— Cassandra Vieten, Ph.D., director of research at the Institute of Noetic Sciences and author of Mindful Motherhood
“Licensed psychologist Somov has found that clients can make progress in the areas of tolerating uncertainty, refraining from harsh self-judgment, and reducing anxious feelings by doing mindfulness exercises. Essentially, the more they accept the moment, thhe more they can accept themselves.
Verdict: Present Perfect, one of the most helpful in the OCPD self-help arena.”
— Deborah Bigelow, Leonia P.L., NJ
From the Publisher
About the Author
Product details
- Publisher : New Harbinger Publications; 1st edition (June 3, 2010)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 208 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1572247568
- ISBN-13 : 978-1572247567
- Item Weight : 10.6 ounces
- Dimensions : 6.2 x 0.5 x 9.2 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #409,299 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #307 in Mood Disorders (Books)
- #938 in Popular Psychology Personality Study
- #42,438 in Self-Help (Books)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

Pavel G. Somov, Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist in private practice.
Publications:
Somov, P. G. (2008)
A Psychodrama Group for Substance Use Relapse Prevention Training. The Arts in Psychotherapy, 38, 151-161.
Somov, P.G. (2007).
Meaning of Life Group: Group Application of Logotherapy for Substance Use Treatment.
Journal for Specialists in Group Work, 32 (4), 316 - 345.
Somov, P.G. (2000)
Time Perception as a Measure of Pain Intensity and Pain Type. Journal of Back & Musculoskeletal Rehabilitation, 14 (3), 111-121.
Education:
State University of New York at Buffalo: Ph.D., Counseling Psychology
Professional Affiliations:
Member of the American Psychological Association (APA)
Member of the Greater Pittsburgh Psychological Association (GPPA)
Member of the Pennsylvania Psychological Association (PPA)
Military Service:
Independent Special Purpose Motorized Rifle Brigade (OMSBON) of the Ministry of Interior of the Soviet Union (1987-1989)
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Before going further, I must say something about "mindfulness" in its title. If you're interested in self-work, you have likely almost started to become drowned in mentions of mindfulness. Here is where this book differs big time. Rather than just an emphasis on focusing on *noticing* and letting things be and breath meditations, Somov's book does something amazing that I had not even realized I was missing in previous forays into mindfulness: he helps you become mindful through concrete behavioral exercises. Now wait! Before you run away, I need you to know that these exercises are not difficult but rather simple and render often immediate awareness, sometimes gradual awareness. I concretely still am aware of some of the realizations.
Beyond the excellent exercises themselves, Somov's style of writing is excellent and concise, explaining seemingly obvious assumptions in ways that show that they are only assumptions. He never forces, only encourages.
Present Perfect has really helped me with the suffering I was feeling due to my perfectionism. I have helped create a space now between the urge to succeed at an ill-defined but overly stressful level, now seeing that (as much as I am disliking this saying lately) _it is what it is_. It's okay if I fall short. I want to do well and sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, sometimes I don't even try, sometimes I make special effort to do especially well, and it's all ok. Now I know WHY I want to excel at a certain thing rather than just having do everything at an unrealistic level. I can choose and it's my own standard, not the voices of people long uninterested with whether I succeed at high levels all the time. In fact, they probably never really cared that much, they only wanted me to do well so I'd feel safe in the world.
This and his other books (The Lotus Effect, Eating the Moment, among many) are true gems in a field full of often repetitive and unhelpful duds.
The premise of the book, in a nut shell, is learning to accept each moment as it is, and understanding that no moment can be more than what it is. In essence, each moment is already perfect. Somov demonstrates this concept through many small exercises throughout the book. I will admit that I did pick and choose the exercises I completed because there were so many.
I really appreciated this book because I found it so applicable. You know it's a good book when you feel like the author is describing you in the text! The author's lessons stuck with me, I found myself being able to apply his wisdom throughout the day (yet another sign of a good book!). I wish I could be less vague in my description; however, I found that the lessons were so deep and meaningful, I don't think I could do them justice in this review. This book has brought new perspective into my life and I highly recommend that anyone struggling with control and perfection to give it a read.







