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Lisa Manterfield
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Life Without Baby: Surviving and Thriving When Motherhood Doesn't Happen Kindle Edition

by Lisa Manterfield (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 75 ratings
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“What if I never get to be a mother?” When this doubt first takes hold, it can knock you completely off your feet. You feel cheated, frustrated, and no longer sure of your place in society, your family, or your circle of friends. Now…imagine you could spend time with someone who really understands how you feel, who lets you express all the things that once seemed whiny, self-indulgent, or just plain crazy, and who confides that she once felt that way too. Life Without Baby founder, Lisa Manterfield, once stood where you are and not only survived, but thrived. Now she shares what she learned from her own experiences and from the women of the community she created. She’ll help you: – Know when it’s time to cut your losses and let go of your dream – Give yourself permission to grieve the loss that few others can truly understand – Learn some emotional aikido moves to handle social challenges, such as baby showers, Mother’s Day, and the dreaded “Do you have kids?” question – Rediscover your passion and find joy again, without enduring a complete life makeover – Get pragmatic about aging without children and building a new kind of family Based on her small-group workshops and popular ebook series, this book offers a combination of hard-won lessons, gentle queries, and real-world suggestions. Manterfield is a comforting and supportive companion who will guide you gently down your own path to making peace with being childfree-not-by-choice and thriving in a new happily ever after.
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  1. Print length
    247 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    March 7, 2016
  4. File size
    3307 KB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
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  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Page by page, Lisa holds your hand with gentle, unflinching support, openly sharing her story with you, and giving you permission, guidance, and gentle queries that help in your journey of healing."
~ Tracey Cleantis, author of The Next Happy: Let Go of the Life You Planned and Find a New Way Forward

"I wish Manterfield's book had been available a decade ago. It would have been a valuable lifeline, a tremendous support at a time there was nothing available for women lost in a maze of fertility treatment promises and murky what ifs."
~ Pamela Mahoney Tsigdinos, author of Silent Sorority

"A comforting book, full of practical help for women who wanted to have children and are trying to move past the overwhelming panic and grief that comes with realizing it's not going to happen. I wish I'd had a book like this when I was 40."
~ Sue Fagalde Lick, author of Childless by Marriage

"If you're newly coming to terms with this, or if you've been living this life for a decade or more, or if you have a friend or family member you want to help, you will find belonging, food for thought, and further hope for a future, wonderful life without baby."
~ Linda Rooney, Founder of No Kidding in NZ

About the Author

Lisa Manterfield is the creator of LifeWithoutBaby.com, the online community that gives a voice to women without children. Her writing has been featured in a broad range of publications, including Huffington Post, Los Angeles Times, and Psychology Today. She has also taken her work to the stage at venues such as Spark Off Rose and Expressing Motherhood. Lisa is the author of the award-winning memoir I'm Taking My Eggs and Going Home: How One Woman Dared to Say No to Motherhood and the novel A Strange Companion. She lives in Southern California with her wonderful husband ("Mr. Fab") and overindulged cat.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B01925VC1O
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Steel Rose Press (March 7, 2016)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ March 7, 2016
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 3307 KB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 247 pages
  • Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ 0983012539
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 4.4 out of 5 stars 75 ratings

About the author

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Lisa Manterfield

Lisa Manterfield

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Lisa Manterfield is the award-winning author of The Smallest Thing and A Strange Companion. Her work has appeared in The Saturday Evening Post, Los Angeles Times, and Psychology Today. Originally from northern England, she now lives in Southern California with her husband and over-indulged cat. Learn more at LisaManterfield.com.

Customer reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
75 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Morgan
5.0 out of 5 stars Healing
Reviewed in the United States on February 7, 2024
Verified Purchase
Buy this book if you are looking for healing, somewhere to turn or looking for someone who has been in your shoes. I really connected with what she said throughout the book and cannot recommend it enough if you are feeling lost.
One person found this helpful
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Mary
5.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful
Reviewed in the United States on February 8, 2021
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Nobody tells you about the unsuccessful IVF stories... I just hoped for a positive outcome, and although I was the ‘ideal candidate’ on paper (under 40, healthy etc) it didn't happen for us. After multiple failed attempts we’ve come to the point where we need to draw the line. We are emotionally, physically and financially drained. I find it very difficult to accept and this book really helps me coping. I would highly recommend this book to anyone dealing with similar issues.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE ❤️
22 people found this helpful
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Rachel
5.0 out of 5 stars Made Me Feel Like I Wasn't The Only One
Reviewed in the United States on August 25, 2020
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This was very timely for me! Read it in a few days! Very much made me feel like I wasn't alone with what I'm going through. I look forwaed to visiting the blog as well. Thankyou Lisa!
5 people found this helpful
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Karen J.
5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended
Reviewed in the United States on January 11, 2020
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Awesome for anyone struggling with this. Basic principals of grief apply, but it is coming from a fresh perspective of someone who has been through this first hand.
6 people found this helpful
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lindsey
5.0 out of 5 stars I wish I read this 3 years ago
Reviewed in the United States on October 8, 2017
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Read this if you have any fertility problems, not a story about how a miracle baby came about, or what strange new diet will improve your chances- read about what to do with yourself if it never happens!
16 people found this helpful
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Kristina Free
5.0 out of 5 stars Much needed
Reviewed in the United States on September 11, 2016
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Thank you, I'm days away from drawing my line in the sand and needed to know there is a way through this.
13 people found this helpful
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CK
5.0 out of 5 stars Really spoke to me.
Reviewed in the United States on November 10, 2017
Verified Purchase
This book made such a difference for me. I can't recommend it highly enough.
4 people found this helpful
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Sarah J Chamberlin
5.0 out of 5 stars A thorough and encouraging guide for a little talked about life altering experience
Reviewed in the United States on December 14, 2018
Surviving and Thriving when Motherhood Doesn’t Happen is chock full of perspectives and ideas for making the rarely spoken of transition from expecting to have children to non parenthood. It is extraordinarily comprehensive.

Grief, self - care, moving away from the dream of motherhood, validation of our losses, social landmines, aging without children and reconnecting with yourself are just some of the things that are covered in detail and with useful pragmatism. Ms. Manterfield’s presentation of the things we wrestle with - hope and other people’s children, for example, are healthy and undeniably grounded.

I was especially touched by her assertion that “You are not broken. You do not need to fix your flaws. You don’t have to compensate for not being a mother.”

The balance Ms. Manterfield strikes when addressing aspects of this experience is commendable. Her realistic view remains consistent throughout as she gently encourages the reader to move forward, but in small steps, while reassuring periodically that the process is far from linear. This book somehow succeeds in walking the artful line of being thoroughly practical but not at all prescriptive.

Intertwined with the transition from infertility to non parenthood’s multiple phases and suggested journal prompts are Lisa’s own personal vignettes. She share her struggles with insightful hindsight, facilitating the reader to more clearly perceive their own behaviors and the possible motivations that underly them.

Surviving and Thriving when Motherhood Doesn’t Happen is written on the subject of a life altering, grueling and soul testing transition that is most often seen by the outside world as a mere technicality (You couldn’t have kids? Yeah, hey oh well!). This thoughtful “how to” book is crucial and much needed.
12 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Marianne Mesch
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Reviewed in Canada on September 7, 2018
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Miriam
5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome
Reviewed in Brazil on February 25, 2017
Verified Purchase
I've chosen this book by chance. Actually I deal with secondary infertility for over 10 years and it's been quite a bumpy road. I could relate to most issues presented, specially with acknowledging loss and grief, but mostly coming to terms with the fact that I will not have children again.
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Amazon Customer
1.0 out of 5 stars Bad books for women who cannot be mothers
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on June 18, 2017
Verified Purchase
Very weird book. The author mentions burying something that would represent an unborn baby...in a cemetary! She also mentions having used Wicca,a form of witchcraft to 'cleanse' her home...
One person found this helpful
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