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355 of 364 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Important topic that most people don't know about., April 25, 2017
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This review is from: Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy (Hardcover)
I'm not finished but I wanted to chime in right away. I'm a Licensed Professional Counselor, part-time teacher at Colorado Christian University, and published author. I live in the Columbine neighborhood and worked with police and firefighters at Ground Zero so healing from trauma is of huge interest to me.

I've spent the last four years researching and writing about the powerful topic of Posttraumatic Growth. (I wish I could tell you the title of my book but it remains in the hands of agents and publishers. I hope it gets to be born someday.)

In the meantime I want to shout hurray and yeehaw on almost every single page of this book.

The smashing point of this book: All people can heal, and some people are even launched to a more meaningful place after experiencing trauma; clinical research shows how.

Growth is actually more common than the much better known and far better studied posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The challenge is to see the opportunity presented by seismic events. After trauma, people need hope. In the aftermath of the tragedy, people need to know there is something better.

Following a traumatic experience, most people experience a range of problems: Trouble sleeping, nightmares, agitation, flashbacks, emotional numbness, avoiding reminders of the traumatic event, anxiety, anger, guilt, hyper-vigilance, depression, isolation, suicidal tendencies, etc. Until recently the entire discussion of the human response to trauma ended with a summation of the hardships incurred by trauma. But as it turns out, a traumatic event is not simply a hardship to be overcome.

Instead, it is transformative.

Trauma survivors and their family and friends need to know there is another side to trauma. Strange as it may sound, half of all sufferers emerge from the trauma stronger, more focused, and with a new perspective on their future. In numerous studies, about half of all trauma survivors report positive changes as a result of their experience. Sometimes the changes are small (life has more meaning, or the survivor feels closer to loved ones) and other times they are massive, sending people on new career paths. The worst things that happen to us might put us on a path to the best things that will ever happen to us. A brush with trauma often pushes trauma survivors to face their own mortality and to find a more meaningful and fulfilling understanding of who they are and how they want to live.

To be clear, growth does not undo loss, and it does not eliminate adversity. Posttraumatic growth is not the same as an increase in well-being or a decrease in distress. And even for those who do experience growth, suffering is not mitigated in the aftermath of tragedy. Growth may make the pain meaningful and bearable, but it does not deny the hurt.

For decades, nearly all the psychological research into trauma and recovery has focused on the debilitating problems that people face, but Option B speaks of the paths people can take to heal from their experiences and discover new meaning in their lives.

Just this morning a blog reader wrote to me and said she feels stuck because of her father's suicide many years ago. The first thing I did was tell her about your book.

I have been, and will be, recommending this book to friends and clients.

Thank you Sheryl and Adam.
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Showing 1-6 of 6 posts in this discussion
Initial post: Apr 25, 2017, 7:02:17 PM PDT
Excellent post and good luck with your new book. For some reason, a phoenix kept coming to mind as I read through your words. Since this growth-after-loss is somewhat the flip side of PTSD, maybe you could coin it "Phoenix Syndrome" (although "syndrome" might sound like it describes something negative...)

In reply to an earlier post on Apr 26, 2017, 12:55:35 PM PDT
Thank you. Your posts were helpful as well. I never thought about the phoenix imagery but it works, doesn't it?

Posted on Apr 28, 2017, 3:44:05 AM PDT
Opus1 says:
Wow well said. An amazing perspective- best of luck with your book

In reply to an earlier post on Apr 28, 2017, 6:01:13 AM PDT
Thank you. I'm passionate about the subject.

Posted on May 4, 2017, 4:51:29 PM PDT
Trasformative-so well put-I loved this review and cannot wait to read this book-losing my husband nearly 13 yrs ago did transform me into a stronger better person.

Posted on May 8, 2017, 7:27:33 AM PDT
Last edited by the author on May 8, 2017, 7:30:23 AM PDT
Mom2Fab5 says:
Lucille,

Your review was thorough and spot on! I am a firm believer in growth following traumatic experiences. My mother died suddenly in her sleep when I was 17 years old. I was just starting college and she left behind my younger brother, sister and my dad who was completely hopeless and lost without her. I literally had to pick up where she left off and I mean EVERYTHING (except for wife part obviously). It was difficult to grieve/mourn her death when I was so busy taking care of everyone and everything (cooking, cleaning, kids to/from school, therapy, appointments, shopping, homework, etc) in addition to trying to continue with school and hold a couple of part-time jobs to help supplement my dads income. It was truly an experience I will never forget and one that I know has prepared me for motherhood and life today (I'm a single, working mother of twins and triplets). My life could have taken so many different directions, but I chose to stay on a path of determination and believed that I was not going to go down like others would at such a tumultuous time. During that time I also lost my maternal grandmother and aunt, and a few years later married and divorced abusive husband. As crazy as my life has been, I would not change the fact that it made me who I am today. I am strong, bold, and fearless and my children are incredibly smart, compassionate and talented young ones. I have managed to continue my education and work despite all that has transpired. Do I miss my mother, grandmother and aunt, sure I do, but they left behind a legacy I will continue to carry on and pass along to my children. I cannot wait to read this book. Your review has made me look forward to reading even more!! Thank you.
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