Customer Reviews: Sexperiment: 7 Days to Lasting Intimacy with Your Spouse
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on March 20, 2012
Sexperiment: 7 Days to Lasting Intimacy with Your Spouse

The Sexperiment is about a challenge for married couples in the church where Ed Young serves as lead pastor to make love for seven consecutive days. The quotes used by co-authors Ed and Lisa Young in this book would lead a reader to believe that the sexperiment has revolutionized some marriages.

When I first began reading about the sexperiment I was immediately drawn to the question, "What would make this sexperiment so beneficial (beyond the obvious)?" In other words, I wanted to know if this whole thing was just a gimmick used to draw in the curious crowd. If it's more than a gimmick, why did the sexperiment have such a big impact. And throughout the book those questions stayed at the forefront of my mind.

Eventually I found myself satisfied when I realized that gradually my questions were answered. I believe the Youngs' answer to this question is that the arrangements a couple has to make in order to make love for seven consecutive days set possible precedents for the immediate future for that couple.

For example, in order to make love seven consecutive days, a married couple would have to prioritize making their sex life above all the other items of life that take our time. When a married couple gets so busy that they don't have time for one another, the sexperiment can help them re-order their lives.

Another example: by the third (or possibly fourth!) day, the husband is not likely making love to satisfy his sexual energy (at least this would be true for most men). So now he can focus on making love to serve her needs, which at that point are not likely sexual in nature by then, either. He may focus on her need for emotional intimacy, using the physical closeness to enhance emotional intimacy.

By the end of the book I was convinced that for some couples, the sexperiment could be a very valid exercise. It was an enjoyable read and Ed and Lisa Young managed to get me past my skepticism.
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on May 20, 2012
When I saw that this book was available for review I thought it sounded like an interesting twist on your typical marriage help books and I was eager to read it. While I sincerely believe that my husband and I have a very good marriage, I figured that there would still be something that we could gain from this book. I started reading the book and it did not disappoint. While yes, the book does definitely focus on having an intimacy with your spouse - it goes beyond that! It covers so many excuses that we let crop into our lives that lead us away from "becoming one" in our marriages.

One of my favorite chapters was actually the first chapter because it covered the differences between men and women and how we think. I couldn't believe how accurate it was! I guess I shouldn't have been too surprised since this is written from a husband and wife team that have been married for over 30 years, but it still amazed me.

I think that this book would be very helpful for any marriage. Even if you have a solid marriage - it will help to solidify your marriage. If your marriage seems to be shaky - it can help you to get it back on track. This book even has a section at the end of each chapter called "Action Steps" for couples that are reading this together and are getting ready to embark on the "Sexperiment". While this book is written for married couples, it also has a section at the end of the chapter called "Before You Do" for engaged couples and "The Yoke is Not a Joke" for those that are still dating. I really appreciated the fact that over and over in these sections they made a point to say that this experiment is only for you once you are married, but there are things that you can consider before you are in that situation.

I received this book for free from FaithWords in exchange for an honest review. I was not required to give a positive review. All words and thoughts in this review are my own.
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on August 15, 2013
Felt that it was too wordy, seemed to focus a lot on why not having sex will cause you to have an affair. talks a lot about why we should and how its a good thing as a christian family but did not feel that it was extremely helpful.
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on May 25, 2016
When I was a newish Christian in 2013, my old church had a young adults ministry and they did a discipleship group based on this book for newly wed couples. They ended up giving me a copy of this book despite the fact I wasn't married and said I wouldn't fit into the group. I only read Pastor Young's book this year because several of my close friends were getting married and I was honestly curious how marital intimacy could help create biblical marriages. Not being married, I took a lot of what I've read to my pastors so they could explain it to me. I'm a conservative confessional Lutheran and none of my pastors had anything nice to say about what Pastor Young wrote in these pages.

Lutherans are generally very pro-marriage (Luther himself especially) but our theology of building stronger marriages is rooted in the law and the gospel. The law is applied to spouses to be better towards each other in addressing faults which prohibit intimacy and the gospel gives grace and reconciliation in the midst of resolved conflict.

After what I've read, Pastor Young doesn't apply any of that (then again he's not a Lutheran). I just think he is sexualizing marital intimacy to an extreme. Sex is one of God's gifts for married couples yes, but there's more to intimacy in marriage than that. I can't help but feel this book is the Christian version of those fad diets. Seven days worth of sexual intimacy isn't going to fix deep marital intimacy issues. In the end, only Christ's gospel can change hearts between spouses to become more loving and intimate. The law does the convicting and the gospel does the healing.

Anyway that's just a confessional Lutheran perspective. This book is very typical of what comes out of non-denominational mega-churches (like my old church). I feel like confessional Christianity offers a more healthful alternative to building more intimate marriages than Pastor Young's book does. I wouldn't recommend it.
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on December 6, 2013
This is a very straight forward book on relationship development. It's not just about sex, but more about how to enhance, develop, kindle, and rekindle a relationship for the long-haul. It is biblically based and easy to read. It flows very smoothly from one aspect of relationship development to the next. Of course the whole premise is based on the fact that God created Sex to be a good thing and not the distorted view that is often associated with it. I definitely suggest it for couples developing a relationship or trying to enhance a marraige.
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on February 11, 2015
I thought this would be more of a 7 day devotional but it wasn't. Ed and Lisa I think you should make a 7 day devotional with scriptures and little Honey do list for the couples. Anyways we loved this book. It broke sex down in ways we never saw before. I would suggest reading this book before you start your sexperiment. I think it is a must read for couples getting married and newlyweds
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on May 12, 2014
I really liked this book and will forever keep it to share with my future husband. I considered myself pretty well-informed when it comes to marriage but I've never really seen it from a thorough bible perspective. It's mind-blowing to know how amazing marriage could be if you prioritize it before anything else under the sun. Highly recommended!
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on January 6, 2013
Just some practical truths on keeping marriage intimate and loving. There are a lot of books on this and this one will give another angle to why it is vital to keep the heart of your sex life beating strong.
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on June 1, 2013
My daughter told me about this book so I thought why not...It is an awsome book and I would tell anybody this is a must have for any marriage. If you are already close this book will just bring you closer, if you are drifting away from each other this book is a for sure think to read.
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on April 14, 2013
This book is amazing for married couples as well as singles looking to narrow down the search for a mate. Great biblical examples. wonderful humorous real life examples. Great wisdom is in this book if your willing to try it out....Are you up for the challange?
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