Fifty Shades of Grey: Book One of the Fifty Shades Trilogy (Fifty Shades of Grey Series) Paperback – April 3, 2012

I really don't like writing bad reviews. I admire people who have the courage to put pen to paper and expose themselves to the whole world, especially those writing erotica. Having just finished this book, however, I feel compelled to write a review.

About half way through the book, I looked up the author to see if she was a teenager. I really did because the characters are out of a 16 year old's fantasy. The main male character is a billionaire (not a millionaire but a billionaire) who speaks fluent French, is basically a concert level pianist, is a fully trained pilot, is athletic, drop dead gorgeous, tall, built perfectly with an enormous penis, and the best lover on the planet. In addition, he's not only self made but is using his money to combat world hunger. Oh yeah, and all of this at the ripe old age of 26! And on top of that, he's never working. Every second is spent having sex or texting and emailing the female character. His billions seem to have just come about by magic. It seriously feels like 2 teenage girls got together and decided to create their "dream man" and came up with Christian Grey.

Then come the sex scenes. The first one is tolerable but as she goes on, they become so unbelievable that it becomes more laughable than erotic. She orgasms at the drop of a hat. He says her name and she orgasms. He simply touches her and she orgasms. It seems that she's climaxing on every page.

Then there's the writing. If you take out the parts where the female character is blushing or chewing her lips, the book will be down to about 50 pages. Almost on every single page, there is a whole section devoted to her blushing, chewing her lips or wondering "Jeez" about something or another. Then there's the use of "shades of". He's "fifty shades of @#$%% up," "she turned 7 shades of crimson," "he's ten shades of x,y, and z." Seriously?

The writing is just not up to par, the characters are unbelievable, and the sex verges on the comical. I don't know what happens in the remaining books and I do not intend to read them to find out. But given the maturity level of the first book, I imagine that they get married, have 2 perfect children, cure world hunger, and live happily ever after while riding into the sunset, as the female character climaxes on her horse causing her to chew her bottom lip and blush fifty shades of crimson. Jeez!

I read this 2nd book in the series and watched the movie as well. Truth be told, I thought the movie was done well. The pacing was good, but the thing that struck me the most was that Anastasia had grown stronger dealing with Christian, which was a good thing. She starts out as this young virgin I had a tough time buying but her growth as a human being was great in the second book. I love erotica and while this isn't quite what I generally read, I have to admit I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the book and the movie.

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY: When college student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly Ana realizes she wants this man, and Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian’s secrets and explores her own desires.

FIFTY SHADES DARKER: Daunted by Christian’s dark secrets and singular tastes, Ana has broken off their relationship to start a new career. But desire for Christian still dominates her every waking thought. They rekindle their searing sensual affair, and while Christian wrestles with his inner demons, Ana is forced to make the most important decision of her life.

FIFTY SHADES FREED: Now, Ana and Christian have it all—love, passion, intimacy, wealth, and a world of possibilities for their future. But Ana knows that loving her Fifty Shades will not be easy, and that being together will pose challenges that neither of them would anticipate. Just when it seems that their strength together will eclipse any obstacle, misfortune, malice, and fate conspire to turn Ana’s deepest fears into reality.

THE ABOVE IS FROM THE BOOK COVERS, and I copied them to give readers of this review a brief synopsis of each book in the trilogy.

First, these books are for adults. They have a lot of explicit content. This does not bother me, but some may not be comfortable reading some of the scenes.

Overall, I think I enjoyed the books. I read them quickly, and read all three, and found them hard to put down. Not sure my inability to put the books down were for the reasons the author would appreciate. Let me explain.

First the graphic sex scenes captured my attention in a "passing a car accident" sort of way. There are toys, several apparatus, and an entire room in this series devoted to BDSM. BDSM is not my preferred genre of books or sex, so this was a new world for me, and it had a hold of my attention, much the same way that passing a terrible car accident might. I wanted to see what had happened to cause the accident, completely out of morbid curiosity, all the while I hoped that no one died and that I didn't see blood as I passed.

There was a story hidden in all of the gratuitous sex though. The story did not seem like the focal point of of the story, so it seemed mildly lacking, as it appeared the sex scenes had more effort put into them than the rest of the story. The plot/story, if read on its own and skipping the sex scenes, may not have been able to stand on its own, or may be completely empty and boring. I would not suggest that the reader skip the scenes, no matter how gratuitous, as they are an integral part of the story.

I gave this series three out of five. I enjoyed it. I learned things that I was not looking to learn. There is whole other lifestyle out there that I have zero experiences in, and these books showed that love can exist even in these lifestyles, despite what so many believe. I could not give this book a four or a five star rating though because the story line was so empty when the sex scenes were removed. The story should have still been good with or without the BDSM, but this one, in my opinion, could not have stood on its own.