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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living: Time-Tested Methods for Conquering Worry (Dale Carnegie Books) Paperback – October 5, 2004

4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 25,273 ratings

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With Dale Carnegie’s expert advice, you’ll learn the proven, time-tested principles to breaking free of worry and anxiety so that you can start living your best life today.

Thanks to Dale Carnegie’s classic work of practical advice, more than six million people have already discovered happier, more fulfilling lives.
How to Stop Worrying and Start Living has also never been more relevant—particularly since it has been updated for the first time in forty years.

In this indispensable guide, you’ll discover how to:

- Quickly pinpoint solutions to any problem that can be put into action right away
- Worry less about business and finances
- Sleep better and feel refreshed each day
- Gain appreciation and gratitude
- Stop getting stuck on criticism

Fascinating to read and easy to apply, this brilliant book cuts to the heart of your most fundamental emotions and provides lasting relief to your worry and anxiety. As millions of others have done, use it to discover your own prosperous, complete, and happy life.

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dale Carnegie (1888–1955) described himself as a “simple country boy” from Missouri but was also a pioneer of the self-improvement genre. Since the 1936 publication of his first book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, he has touched millions of readers and his classic works continue to impact lives to this day. Visit DaleCarnegie.com for more information.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

How This Book Was Written

-- and Why

In 1909, I was one of the unhappiest lads in New York. I was selling motor trucks for a living. I didn't know what made a motor truck run. That wasn't all: I didn't want to know. I despised my job. I despised living in a cheap furnished room on West Fifty-sixth Street -- a room infested with cockroaches. I still remember that I had a bunch of neckties hanging on the walls; and when I reached out of a morning to get a fresh necktie, the cockroaches scattered in all directions. I despised having to eat in cheap, dirty restaurants that were also probably infested with cockroaches.

I came home to my lonely room each night with a sick headache -- a headache bred and fed by disappointment, worry, bitterness, and rebellion. I was rebelling because the dreams I had nourished back in my college days had turned into nightmares. Was this life? Was this the vital adventure to which I had looked forward so eagerly? Was this all life would ever mean to me -- working at a job I despised, living with cockroaches, eating vile food -- and with no hope for the future?...I longed for leisure to read, and to write the books I had dreamed of writing back in my college days.

I knew I had everything to gain and nothing to lose by giving up the job I despised. I wasn't interested in making a lot of money, but I was interested in making a lot of living. In short, I had come to the Rubicon -- to that moment of decision which faces most young people when they start out in life. So I made my decision -- and that decision completely altered my future. It has made the rest of my life happy and rewarding beyond my most Utopian aspirations.

My decision was this: I would give up the work I loathed; and, since I had spent four years studying in the State Teachers College at Warrensburg, Missouri, preparing to teach, I would make my living teaching adult classes in night schools. Then I would have my days free to read books, prepare lectures, write novels and short stories. I wanted "to live to write and write to live."

What subject should I teach to adults at night? As I looked back and evaluated my own college training, I saw that the training and experience I had had in public speaking had been of more practical value to me in business -- and in life -- than everything else I had studied in college all put together. Why? Because it had wiped out my timidity and lack of self-confidence and given me the courage and assurance to deal with people. It had also made clear that leadership usually gravitates to the man who can get up and say what he thinks.

I applied for a position teaching public speaking in the night extension courses both at Columbia University and New York University, but these universities decided they could struggle along somehow without my help.

I was disappointed then -- but now I thank God that they did turn me down, because I started teaching in YMCA night schools, where I had to show concrete results and show them quickly. What a challenge that was! These adults didn't come to my classes because they wanted college credits or social prestige. They came for one reason only: they wanted to solve their problems. They wanted to be able to stand up on their feet and say a few words at a business meeting without fainting from fright. Salesmen wanted to be able to call on a tough customer without having to walk around the block three times to get up courage. They wanted to develop poise and self-confidence. They wanted to get ahead in business. They wanted to have more money for their families. And since they were paying their tuition on an installment basis -- and they stopped paying if they didn't get results -- and since I was being paid, not a salary, but a percentage of the profits, I had to be practical if I wanted to eat.

I felt at the time that I was teaching under a handicap, but I realize now that I was getting priceless training. I had to motivate my students. I had to help them solve their problems. I had to make each session so inspiring that they wanted to continue coming.

It was exciting work. I loved it. I was astounded at how quickly these businessmen developed self-confidence and how quickly many of them secured promotions and increased pay. The classes were succeeding far beyond my most optimistic hopes. Within three seasons, the YMCAs, which had refused to pay me five dollars a night in salary, were paying me thirty dollars a night on a percentage basis. At first, I taught only public speaking, but, as the years went by, I saw that these adults also needed the ability to win friends and influence people. Since I couldn't find an adequate textbook on human relations, I wrote one myself. It was written -- no, it wasn't written in the usual way. It grew and evolved out of the experiences of the adults in these classes. I called it How to Win Friends and Influence People.

Since it was written solely as a textbook for my own adult classes, and since I had written four other books that no one had ever heard of, I never dreamed that it would have a large sale: I am probably one of the most astonished authors now living.

As the years went by, I realized that another one of the biggest problems of these adults was worry. A large majority of my students were businessmen -- executives, salesmen, engineers, accountants: a cross section of all the trades and professions -- and most of them had problems! There were women in the classes -- businesswomen and housewives. They, too, had problems! Clearly, what I needed was a textbook on how to conquer worry -- so again I tried to find one. I went to New York's great public library at Fifth Avenue and Forty-second Street and discovered to my astonishment that this library had only twenty-two books listed under the title WORRY. I also noticed, to my amusement, that it had one hundred eighty-nine books listed under WORMS. Almost nine times as many books about worms as about worry! Astounding, isn't it? Since worry is one of the biggest problems facing mankind, you would think, wouldn't you, that every high school and college in the land would give a course on "How to Stop Worrying"? Yet, if there is even one course on that subject in any college in the land, I have never heard of it. No wonder David Seabury said in his book How to Worry Successfully: "We come to maturity with as little preparation for the pressures of experience as a bookworm asked to do a ballet."

The result? More than half of our hospital beds are occupied by people with nervous and emotional troubles.

I looked over these twenty-two books on worry reposing on the shelves of the New York Public Library. In addition, I purchased all the books on worry I could find; yet I couldn't discover even one that I could use as a text in my course for adults. So I resolved to write one myself.

I began preparing myself to write this book seven years ago. How? By reading what the philosophers of all ages have said about worry. I also read hundreds of biographies, all the way from Confucius to Churchill. I also interviewed scores of prominent people in many walks of life, such as Jack Dempsey, General Omar Bradley, General Mark Clark, Henry Ford, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Dorothy Dix. But that was only a beginning.

I also did something else that was far more important than the interviews and the reading. I worked for five years in a laboratory for conquering worry -- a laboratory conducted in our own adult classes. As far as I know, it was the first and only laboratory of its kind in the world. This is what we did. We gave students a set of rules on how to stop worrying and asked them to apply these rules in their own lives and then talk to the class on the results they had obtained. Others reported on techniques they had used in the past.

As a result of this experience, I presume I have listened to more talks on "How I Conquered Worry" than has any other individual who ever walked this earth. In addition, I read hundreds of other talks on "How I Conquered Worry" -- talks that were sent to me by mail -- talks that had won prizes in our classes that are held throughout the world. So this book didn't come out of an ivory tower. Neither is it an academic preachment on how worry might be conquered. Instead, I have tried to write a fast-moving, concise, documented report on how worry has been conquered by thousands of adults. One thing is certain: this book is practical. You can set your teeth in it.

"Science," said the French philosopher Valéry, "is a collection of successful recipes." That is what this book is: a collection of successful and time-tested recipes to rid our lives of worry. However, let me warn you: you won't find anything new in it, but you will find much that is not generally applied. And when it comes to that, you and I don't need to be told anything new. We already know enough to lead perfect lives. We have all read the golden rule and the Sermon on the Mount. Our trouble is not ignorance, but inaction. The purpose of this book is to restate, illustrate, streamline, air-condition, and glorify a lot of ancient and basic truths -- and kick you in the shins and make you do something about applying them.

You didn't pick up this book to read about how it was written. You are looking for action. All right, let's go. Please read Parts One and Two of this book -- and if by that time you don't feel that you have acquired a new power and a new inspiration to stop worry and enjoy life -- then toss this book away. It is no good for you.

Dale Carnegie

Copyright 1944, 1945, 1946, 1947, 1948 by Dale Carnegie. Copyright renewed.

Copyright © 1984 by Donna Dale Carnegie and Dorothy Carnegie

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Gallery Books; Revised edition (October 5, 2004)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 320 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0671035975
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0671035976
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 9.6 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.31 x 0.8 x 8.25 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 25,273 ratings

About the author

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Dale Carnegie
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Dale Carnegie (1888-1955) described himself as a "simple country boy" from Missouri but was also a pioneer of the self-improvement genre. Since the 1936 publication of his first book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, he has touched millions of readers and his classic works continue to impact lives to this day.

Image by Dale Carnegie Created in vector format by Scewing (Heritage Auctions) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
25,273 global ratings

Customers say

Customers find the book easy to read and useful. They appreciate the solid practical advice and reminders. Readers mention the book references many stories from people's lives. They say it's unique in several ways and worth the money.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

360 customers mention "Readability"322 positive38 negative

Customers find the book to be a great, useful, and relaxing read. They appreciate the author's ability to tell short anecdotes that relate precisely. Readers also mention the principles are simple yet timeless and revolve around a traditional Judeo-Christian faith.

"...don't get a well grounded common sense education.. this book is worth checking out...." Read more

"This book was easy to read and apply. Although it was written many decades ago it is applicable to today." Read more

"...Definitely, it is a good read! Of course, some chapters were dull, and had to be re-read to get the point cross...." Read more

"...this book is a very relaxing read, going through common experiences and how they have led him to find these affirmations...." Read more

309 customers mention "Advice level"305 positive4 negative

Customers find the advice in the book solid, practical, and helpful. They say it helps them bring some things into perspective about their own thought patterns and habits. Readers also mention the principles in the book are timeless and provide great techniques to combat and deal with worry.

"...Anyways, the book offers a lot of sound basic advice...." Read more

"...Although it was written many decades ago it is applicable to today." Read more

"...Make the best situation out of any situation, even if it is the worst case...." Read more

"...This book has helped me really crack down on stressful situations and deal with them calm and at ease...." Read more

55 customers mention "Brevity"48 positive7 negative

Customers find the book brevity. They say it references many stories from people's lives and is unique in several ways. Readers also mention the book has thoughtful examples and ideas on how to cope with worry. They appreciate the great premise and interesting practices for use in life.

"This is such a unique book in several ways...." Read more

"...To be blatently honest, its a great bathroom reader. Each chapter is independent enough so that you do not have to really read them in any order...." Read more

"...He also relates a number of interesting (maybe incredible and inspiring) stories about individuals that have conquered worry, one story about Earl P..." Read more

"...You really get a fascinating look at this time period...." Read more

25 customers mention "Value for money"25 positive0 negative

Customers find the book worth the money. They say it contains practical advice. Readers also appreciate the great and wonderful services.

"...Check this out. Definitely worth the money." Read more

"...books are still bestsellers today ought to tell you that they are valuable, worthwhile reading, and worth their weight in 24k gold." Read more

"..." but I've always felt this book is just as powerful and valuable...." Read more

"Well worth it , opens your eyes to overthinking and tips and tricks to try to help you get your mind back from constant stress and overthinking...." Read more

21 customers mention "Story quality"21 positive0 negative

Customers find the stories in the book entertaining, thrilling, and interesting. They say the practical approach makes good sense. Readers also mention the book will open their eyes and make them laugh.

"...think a book might help on my success but this is very helpful and interesting" Read more

"...The writing style is easy to read and comprehend and at times humerous...." Read more

"...what's important and what's not in your life, then this book will open your eyes and make you laugh at some of the things you've been so worried..." Read more

"...across such a book as this that is cram packed full of true & interesting stories, well-researched, and contains the wisdom I need...." Read more

19 customers mention "Dated content"3 positive16 negative

Customers find the content dated. They say some of the anecdotes are outdated.

"Although the book is dated and the references to men and women are arguably sexist, the advice Dale Carnegie gives is just as relevant today as it..." Read more

"...This books is SO old-fashioned, especially when referring to women, but that's because it was written decades ago...." Read more

"...When I opened the book, I sort of rolled my eyes. Looked old, didn’t seem interesting at all...." Read more

"You might think this book is old and outdated - what it shows is there is nothing new under the sun...." Read more

Extremely Poor Quality
1 out of 5 stars
Extremely Poor Quality
The worst copy of a book I have ever seen. Pages missing, pages out of sequence, and faded print throughout the book. Unfortunately, I didn’t start readingy it until after the return period. If you order, make sure to check quality immediately. Definitely don’t give as a gift. But best solution is to buy a completely different version.
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Top reviews from the United States

Reviewed in the United States on September 28, 2024
This is such a unique book in several ways. First Dale Carnegie presents stories; second, he gives facts and statistics to prove his points, and third, he gives us practical action steps to implement. I was going to give this book away to a friend, but ended up ordering another one because I wanted to keep it so I could reference all the practical steps.
Reviewed in the United States on August 12, 2015
This book, in the inner cover it has a copyright of '1944'. As of today this book is 71 Years old. That's crazy...
None the less, 90 pages in, I have underlined quite a bit of the book as I make my way through it. I am using "How to stop worrying and start living" as a work book like the author suggested.
Most of the advice, is golden if you don't get too caught up in the context. And it seems that some particular advice is re-iterated in another way, to add emphasis. Then on top of this, the author interviewed a ton of people.. and from today's point of view, some of the individuals that the author talked to.. are markers in history. They all did something profound.

If your like myself, curious, and trying to improve your lot in life.. especially in today's climate. Everywhere you turn there is a fear monger.. from our own government to, the local associated press. They are trying to sell you "fear" by the truck loads.. Nothing wrong with being informed of the dangers that exist, but it's also very good to have the context of the situation, some hard numbers to go by. Other wise your imagination just runs off with you. And quite frankly I think that's the whole point.

What's that famous quote by Rahm Emanuel.

"You never let a serious crisis go to waste. And what I mean by that it's an opportunity to do things you think you could not do before."

Source: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/r/rahm_emanuel.html

Quote basically is getting at the fact, that you don't think at all when your worrying.. your more likely to take action in the heat of the moment and do something stupid, or do something stupid and help someone else out..

Anyways, the book offers a lot of sound basic advice. So if your like me and you didn't get a well grounded common sense type of upbringing, no guidance really at all.. because your parents didn't know any better.. and public school is definitely the kind of place you don't get a well grounded common sense education.. this book is worth checking out. Because the truly smart person knows, that there is always something around the next corner, as far as little nuggets of wisdom go. Always something worth learning. Always ways to improve your odds.

I'll leave this review with one of my favorite quotes from the book:

'I keep six honest serving-men
(They taught me all I knew);
Their names are What and Why and When
And How and Where and Who.' -Rudyard kipling

If you find yourself overwhelmed by worry..your mind tends to drift toward the negatives too much. Check this out. Definitely worth the money.
22 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on August 10, 2024
I’ve read a lot of self help books and I’m very picky about them. This one was one of my favorites. I learned a lot from this book and truly feel like my life has changed for the better since reading it.
2 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on December 22, 2023
I recommend this book to anyone who has a problem dealing with stress and need to take a step back and come back to reality. This book has helped me really crack down on stressful situations and deal with them calm and at ease. this book is a very relaxing read, going through common experiences and how they have led him to find these affirmations. If you have a problem with stressful situations like i did this book is for you!!
7 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on July 14, 2024
This book was easy to read and apply. Although it was written many decades ago it is applicable to today.
2 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on July 18, 2024
Great ideas and otions to apply in life to help or stop worrying an live a beter lif. Ler the pasr go, focus on the present an not get axious about tomrrow
2 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on August 25, 2015
One of my biggest problems with this book is that I didn't really need it in the first place. I don't worry very much, at least not in the sense that this book addresses. This book is for people who are paralyzed by fear, either due to a destructive mental attitude or some unintended external factors. Since I am generally confident in myself, am mostly concerned with school or other work that I am intrinsically motivated to handle, and have thankfully never had to deal with anything I would call a real tragedy or highly traumatic experience, I don't find myself in the desperate situations that plague the many subjects of "How to Stop Worrying". Similarly, most of the advice on "How to break the Worry Habit Before it Breaks You" (Part 3 of the book) is not particularly useful for me.

That being said, for people who do need to stop worrying (as I wish my parents would), Carnegie's advice is mostly sound. True, it's nothing we all haven't heard before (e.g. "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade"; "count your blessings"; etc.), but it's nevertheless worth internalizing and practicing in our daily lives. Some of Carnegie's tips are more practical. When you're faced with a tough decision, he suggests writing out your problem and logically evaluating your options for how to proceed. Carnegie also recommends putting a "stop-loss order on your worries," exercising to alleviate stress, and not expecting gratitude from people, all solid methods to reduce worry and frustration. I found the section on "Six Ways to Prevent Worry and Fatigue and Keep Your Energy and Spirits High" (Part 7) especially useful.

Many of Carnegie's suggestions, however, are too abstract and idealized to be useful to highly rational, analytical-type people. (It's worth noting that scientists and engineers seemed to make up a very small percentage of Carnegie's examples; he mostly focused on businessmen and housewives.) For example, Chapter 16, "Find Yourself and Be Yourself" warns against emulating role models, but this is an essential part of the path to success for many great people. Chapter 18 outright claims that one can "cure depression in fourteen days" by simply doing good deeds for other people, which is ridiculous to anyone with even a partial understanding of the complex disease that is depression.

But undoubtedly the worst offense is the unrelenting promotion of Christianity (despite some failed attempts to seem liberal and open to all faiths). I was able to ignore these references, chalking them up to the book's age, until I got to Part 5, "The Perfect Way to Conquer Worry". The entire section is literally a sermon proclaiming that the ultimate solution to all of life's misery is to resign all our worries to God and trust His judgement on how things should turn out. What if God is too busy to heal your dying child? What if you're forced to turn to a medical doctor? Or worse, what if you yourself have to take responsibility for your own life? Carnegie even recommends going to church on weekday afternoons to pray, as if the rest of us have nothing better to do. He goes as far as asserting that even people who don't follow the Christian faith are Christians simply by virtue of being decent people. This is both infuriating and absurd. All Christians are supposed to be good people, but not all good people are Christians. After forcing myself to read through the whole section, I quickly lost my patience with the constant Jesus references. If you're already devoutly Christian, Jewish, or Muslim, or are looking to be converted, none of this will be a problem for you. If you fancy yourself the more open-minded, self-reliant type, you've been warned.

In the final analysis, this book deserves at least an "okay" rating for offering some sound advice and helping millions of people in the many, many decades since it was written. As much as Carnegie's religious vitriol angered me, I will have to keep some of his more practical suggestions in mind. If nothing else, the book is a quick and easy read, even when rereading and marking up each chapter. If you find yourself worrying frequently or severely, this book is absolutely for you. If you consider yourself more legitimately concerned than irrationally worried, I would recommend turning instead to books on productivity.
84 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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GT
5.0 out of 5 stars Transform Your Life with 'How to Stop Worrying and Start Living'
Reviewed in Canada on March 29, 2023
I loved this book! "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" offers practical and insightful advice on how to manage and overcome worry in our lives. The author, Dale Carnegie, presents a wide range of strategies and techniques that are easy to understand and apply, regardless of your background or situation.

One of the things I appreciated most about this book was how it opened my eyes to different ways of looking at things and helped me let go of worries that were beyond my control. By focusing on what we can do instead of what we can't, we can reduce stress and anxiety and live a more fulfilling life. The book is full of inspiring examples and stories of people who have successfully overcome worry and achieved great things.

Overall, I highly recommend "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" to anyone who wants to improve their mental health and wellbeing. Whether you're dealing with a specific problem or just want to feel more calm and centered in your daily life, this book has something to offer. It's a timeless classic that deserves a place on everyone's bookshelf!
Gabriel
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical Teachings
Reviewed in Brazil on November 2, 2021
Excellent book, it tells how to solve things in a practical way. I really recommend that!
Amrutraj Patil
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing Book
Reviewed in India on September 26, 2024
Very effective and amazing book in the current times. A must read for all who want a stress free life.
abra
5.0 out of 5 stars tekrar okunacak bir kitap
Reviewed in Turkey on August 20, 2024
çok eski yazılmış olmasına rağmen okuması kolay ve feğerli yorumları var
Kindle Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars If you are a worrier, you need to read this.
Reviewed in Spain on April 16, 2024
It's definitely a book that has helped me immediately. I can't find words to express how necessary this book is for people who worry too much.